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The Importance of Loving Yourself

Updated on January 2, 2019

How to fix your heart today!

This article is for everyone. But is more likely for the younger people.

We are in an age that we fall in love instantly, every thing that a man or a woman do to us, we tend to like that. If they are nice to us, if they compliment us, if they say that we deserve love, we should not be alone, and all that staff....what we do?

We start feeling things for that person.

And why that happen?

We feel lonely and we need love.

I'm gonna tell you something, most of the time we create expectations, dreams, even if we don't like too much this person, we just create that thoughs, because they said that we are pretty. And that's our problem. We start to become more controller, we act like if we own that person, we make planes for the future and imagine our kids name. And yet, that person didn't say that love us, that want's us for something serious...but we forget that and make plans.

Then, we get disappointed.

Things are not going so well, we try to make an effort. But damn, he didn't say that he loves me. And then we think, well he is afraid of commitment, I should wait. We wait and we start to have bad feeling about us. We think that the problem is with us. Maybe I'm fatter, maybe I'm boring, maybe I don't give to him freedom, maybe II should make him jealous. And that perfect romance start to become a problem.

To be honest, this is really our problem. We accept the love that we think that we deserve. Oh! We deserve much more than that!! And we just realize when we wake up to reality and we saw that that person is not in love with us, that person just like to be with us. And we suffer. We cry. We believe that no one will love us. We believe that we are going to have 5 cats and 2 dogs, because we are lonely (by the way, there's nothing wrong with that. Animals need love).

Wait,

the light appears in our head, and we start to take care of ourselves, we don't want anything more with that person. We said goodbye and started to enjoy life. We go out, we dance and you kiss the first guy that tells you that want to meet to better and that you are pretty and that pays you drink. And you do this over and over again. Until you realize, that you are in the same cycle again, you have low expectations and you fall in love again. Also, again, things don't go well and to realize that there is something wrong with you.

In the middle of that, the boy that you love before send you a message with just a “hello”, with exclamation point, without smile, just an easy “hello, how are you?”. And it happens again, we look at that sentence like if it was written “Hey! I really miss you, I can't stop thinking about you”. One more heart broken. That's what happen next.

Well, we start to get tired. And we try to focus on other things. Suddenly we discover a new hobby, a new passion, a new song that doesn't remind us anyone. We start to do more exercise, we laugh more, we try new lipsticks, we take a haircut, we start loving ourselves and believing that the right person will appear when you less expect.


But we believe that person will appear maybe in one week or two, and that didn't happen. We start to getting sad, we see romantic movies, we cry again.

Time passes, we forget about that. And then, suddenly, you notice, maybe I should wait. You will stop thinking about getting a boyfriend. Looks right? But you know what happen? You stop thinking that and start thinking that love is an illusion. You start to think with your body, you become more sexy, more seductive, you want to be all the girl that a man dreams.

You get tired. You just want someone to love you like you deserve.

Let me know

How many times you fell lonely?

See results

How many times your heart was broken?

See results

Do you love yourself?

See results

The Solution

Well, now you have two options.
Or
you decide that love is really, love happens and that you will love our self so much, that you will know who is the right person for you.

Or you stay in the same, having bad thoughs, getting in awful relationships.

It's your choice.

I know it's hard to move one. But you really need to do that in order to organize your heart and your life.

Are you going to take care of you now?

See results

Girl You'II Be a Woman Soon

© 2019 Cristiana Marques

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    • Cristianasmarques profile imageAUTHOR

      Cristiana Marques 

      15 months ago from Portugal

      Amazing ! I think that you said it all!

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      15 months ago from Chicago

      The biggest flow with being young is immaturity and lacking wisdom which can only come through life experience.

      Simply put we didn't know {what we didn't know} while all the while acting as if we knew it all. Our parents couldn't tell us crap.

      The reality is very few people find their "soulmate" at age 16!

      Most of us began pursuing relationships before we took the time to figure out who (we) are let alone know what we wanted or needed in a mate for life.

      It's the equivalent of going shopping without a list!

      We allowed "impulsive connections" and "happenstance" to dictate our relationship choices. We truly believed we "knew it all".

      High school sweethearts going away to different colleges with the belief they are going to maintain a long-distance relationship for the next 4-6 years while getting their degrees are in for a shock.

      After one or two semesters of going to class and quietly studying in one's dorm room eventually students make new friends on campus, go to sporting events, concerts, parties, and possibly pledge a sorority or fraternity. At some point there is an urge to date someone who is actually on the same campus with you nine months out of the year as opposed to waiting for long holidays or summer to see your mate.

      Are there "exceptions"? Sure, but not many!

      Having "unrealistic expectations" can lead to major heartache.

      Young people oftentimes live with "the urgency of now" and believe that is all that matters. They can't conceive of life as being a marathon instead of a sprint. This also leads to major mistakes.

      Whatever you feel makes for an "ideal mate" at age 17 or 20 will not be enough for you at age 25, 30 or beyond.

      Truth be told when it comes to love and relationships most us (fail our way) to success. Very few people hit a homerun their first, second, third, or fourth time up at bat. If this were not the case we would all be married to our high school sweethearts!

      It is after experiencing breakups and heartaches that we start to craft our own mate selection/screening process and "must haves list. Essentially we learn to "date smarter".

      With age and life experience we gain wisdom and accept the fact most new relationships begin with an "infatuation phase". We learn not to overly commit or emotionally invest in those we barely know.

      We do not ignore "red flags" and we learn to look out for ourselves.

      "Knowledge is being aware that fire can burn; wisdom is remembering the blister." - Leo Tolstoy

      In a world with over 7 Billion people rejection just means: Next!

      In order for your (ex) to have been "the one" he/she would have had to see (you) as being "the one". At the very least a "soulmate" is someone who actually wants to be with you!

      "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."

      - Oscar Wilde

      Know yourself, Love yourself, Trust yourself. The world may not owe you anything but (you) owe yourself the world!

    • Eurofile profile image

      Liz Westwood 

      15 months ago from UK

      When I saw the title, I assumed this was going to be medical tips for a healthy heart. Maybe that shows my age.

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