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How to Meet Men? - IN BARS!

Updated on July 28, 2011

Rediscover the Bar Scene

I've seen a few good HUBS and blogs regarding how to meet potential partners, however all of them slammed the bar scene. Everyone is very quick to say, "Oh, I don't want to meet anyone in a bar."

I'm telling you, the bar is back. And the "bar" is set a lot higher than it used to be.

There are absolutely meat market bars out there, and if that's what you're looking for, go for it.

But not all bars are like that.

Bars have become as specific as anything else. Alvin Toffler predicted that society would reflect in this way in his book Future Shock.

Nightclubs, venues, pubs and bars can be as unique and as individual as we are. There are champagne bars, martini bars, cigar rooms, jazz joints, open mic nights, places geared toward sexual preference, musical preference and sports preference.

There are areas that have lots of terrific unique bars, like Long Island where you can take your choice of Bartini, Croxley, or Ultrasound on any given weekend.

In areas that do not have a large choice of venues, there are central bars that have specific nights to accommodate many different tastes. They may host a live band Saturday night, an open mic Sunday night, line dancing once a month, and dart tournaments annually. Theme nights or parties are always fun too, like luaus or St Patrick's Day celebrations. When it's warm outside, bars that feature patios, volleyball, or outside service are a lot of fun.

When there is a common thread in the room, it is easy to fit in. You can strike up a conversation in a Sports Bar about the game on the big screen quite easily. You can meet guys into the same things you're into if you go to a wine bar hosting a slient auction or a charity event.

Never under estimate the power of the Happy Hour. I still say this is one of the safest and easiest bar scenes to enter. Ask your coworkers if they want to pick a night and a place where Happy Hour could be a regular thing. Maybe every payday, or every Thursday. This is also a great way to keep in touch with friends and coworkers from your prior places of employment: keep going to their happy hours.

This doesn't have to be an evening - long commitment. You can do an hour. This may not even change your car pool or day care schedule. If your workplace enjoys flexhours, you may even go in early or work through part of your lunch to leave a bit earlier to hit a certain happy hour and still be home at exactly the same time. Or if you work out at the gym 4 nights a week, set your Happy Hour for that one night you take off from the gym.

Houlihan's in Austin Texas features Happy Hour every day from 4:00PM - 8:00PM. That's perfect for the after work crowd. It's daylight, it's convenient to swing in when the office closes, before you go to the gym or before you go home. Beers are a buck and appetizers are half price.

Check with your local Chamber of Commerce or Jaycees for business card exchanges, happy hours, and office mixers in your area. These are usually Happy Hours with name tags. These events are a great way to socialize and meet other professionals in your town. Happy Hours can be classy, upscale, and inviting.

There are gatherings going on around you for all price ranges, for all age ranges, and for all kinds of working folk.

There's a bar not far from me where the police seem to congregate off duty. There's also a bar I know of that the UPS guys infiltrate when they get off. (And some of them are freaking HOT.) The Ruby Tuesdays in a mall not far from me is the place for mall employees to gather. Those cute Aeropostale, Abercrombie & Fitch, and Gap guys are in there almost every night for their breaks or after their stores close.

These are also opportunities to network. Maybe you bump into a cute guy from the Gap at Macaroni Grille every Thursday night. And maybe it winds up that he already has a partner. But you meet him and his partner... you hang out and chat and have a couple of Mojitos with them ... and in a few weeks, as it turns out, that cute Gap boy has a friend or a brother that's just perfect for you. Maybe he suggests it, or maybe the brother just pops in one night. You never know.

I'm not saying you have to put on your "fuck-me" heels and slither around in the dives and holes at midnight. (Unless you want to. By all means.) I'm not even saying you have to drink. I'm saying that bars have changed rearranged and cultivated over the years. It's not a scene to be dismissed especially if you've never even tried it.

If you like this HUB please click the “Thumbs-Up” below just before the comments.


All text is original content by Veronica.

All photos are used with permission.

All videos are used courtesy of Youtube.


Submit a Comment

  • profile image


    9 years ago

    I agree with the article. Most of us work and then hang out with friends in bars. Unless we want to date our friends, chances are, we'll meet our partners in bars. Sure most people we won't fall in love with but that's life; most people we'll meet won't be the one but then they might be and even if they're not, they could be a great story to tell our friends over a drink.

  • profile image

    Ancient Prince 

    10 years ago

    A"jazz joint" is most certainly a bar. This article is all about the many different types of bars and bar crowds. (And every bar other than upscale bars are meat markets? Are you kidding??)

    I love the article, I love all your articles. I dislike some of the dumbass comments, but I always love your articles.

  • profile image


    11 years ago

    I have been working in corporate America for 16 years and I can tell you for a fact that happy hours are great. They bring people together in all different ways. I have made business associations and found out about new companies nd their new projects by socializing at different happy hours. I have made lots of friends that share my kind of lifestyle juggling an executive job and a family. Yes, many of the ladies I know have met male colleagues at happy hours. It is a great way to meet dates and friends and to network.

  • barryrutherford profile image

    Barry Rutherford 

    11 years ago from Queensland Australia

    good post I like this one youve cleared up a few things about them...

  • Isabella Snow profile image

    Isabella Snow 

    11 years ago

    I like the idea of meeting someone in a "jazz joint" but to me, that's a club and not a bar. A jazz club, blues club, what have you. Upscale bars are nice place to meet upscale men - every other kind of bar I've ever been in screams meatmarket though. In the US, anyway.

    Over here, people are serious about beer and go out really primarily to drink! God help the woman who interrupts a man and his beer!!!

  • Veronica profile imageAUTHOR


    11 years ago from NY

    Woohoo! Goodwitch, that's awesome!

  • Goodwitch profile image


    11 years ago

    Excellent article!  It goes to prove the point...if you're doing something for YOURSELF (like going to a theme bar or club that is hosting something you're genuinely interested in), chances are you'll meet someone of like mind!   Although I didn't meet my husband in a bar, I had just come from a bar and was absolutely plastered (I had a business meeting scheduled with him that I showed up for very early.  I wound up killing time at a local bar drinking strawberry daquires until it was time for our meeting).   Yes...I got the job, and the man! LOL!

  • Veronica profile imageAUTHOR


    11 years ago from NY

    Thanks Katrina!

    And congratulations on a healthy happy marriage! You're living proof that the bar scene can work.

    I applaud your openness about go-go bars, too. I love 'em myself ;)

  • profile image


    11 years ago

    I totally agree..

    I met my husband in a bar.... in a strip club no less... I don't feel it matters where you meet someone. as long as you mesh with the person.... then take it from there... I was never the type to have a problem with strip bars, as I know some women are. I am confident enough with myself, & trusting enough with my husband, ( which by the way if you're not, please don't marry), to not concern myself with him going to those bars... And to be honest, when we we're younger is when we frequented them... Now we're married for 6 years with a 4 year old boy, and perfectly happy. If it wasn't for the bar scene it never would have happened... I'm with you.. Long live the bar scene!!!.. What's the worst that can happen??? He's an ass, or she's an ass... Either way you shouldn't commit till you know the whole deal


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