- Gender and Relationships
Inside a husbands head. How to determine what he is thinking and respond properly.
The wife waits patiently... like a Tigress.
In a mans head, somewhere between the drive to chase his wife and the desire to argue with her instead... Is a wide gulf of an expanse... an expanse of pensive waiting to see what she is going to do. Is she really interested or is she just going through the motions? If she is really interested, then she knows what I like and what turns me on.. why doesn't she "suit up" with the type of intimate aparal she knows her husband likes, and do those things that she knows sets the mood with him and turns him on? Now this article is not a article writtin on the womens side of things... to give her excuses for her disinterest.. (Rationally thinking there are enough reasons we can be sure... deadlines, house cleaning kids fighting etc) and being not in the mood...
But the Subject at hand is... Why is He not in the mood... and why is He not doing what he would normally do which is to count the days down from the first red flag, marking it on a calender and checking it daily to see how many days left until its safe to play with his wife again.. stalking her.... pensively waiting for her... then attacking her when she is ready...
Well... in some cases... a man may not move in for the attack.. and you say to yourself. "thats funny... normally he would be after me by now." and you do not realize that it is allready several days overdue... that your normal sex season should have started several days ago and that now instead of your husband being aggressivly looking for you... he is just getting more aggresive... Irritable... and in your womanly intuition you say to yourself... "If he is going to be like that, he can just do without."
Warning. You are headed for a fall.
Men need to be shown attention just like women do. While some men require more maintenance than others be sure that there are times when your husband needs you to come looking for him, and reassure him that you are waiting just for him. That you are still interested in Him. Now let me emphasise what I mean here... I do not mean a lazy proffering of your posture at him and makeing a comment like... "come on Big boy... get it over with" But quite the contrary... To prepare for him early on... Flirt with him even... Clean yourself up completely and let him know that you are headed there to do just that... "Clean up yourself" and Put on something you know HE Thinks is sexy. And that does not mean the same old Grannyware that you know he cant stand the looks of... or the worn out bra that barely holds your boobs above your navel. I said and i mean to go and prepare for your husband as though he has Value to you, and as though you would like to Save your Marriage!!
Stop treating him like he is replaceable.
You sit around wringing your hands and worrying about him running off with another women or having an affair, but what are you doing about it to prevent his interest from going there?
Inside a mans head the best defense he has against sinning against his wife is the thought that maybe tonight... maybe tonight she will be ready for me... Maybe tonight my wife will come to chase and play with me...
But sadly... what goes through many mens minds is more like "Hmmmph... where is she? she has been off her period for 3 days allready and I know she is Ovulating... but there is no sign of her being interested..." then... a day or two later the thoughts become "She doesn't care.these days...I .guess "we" are just getting old".
Ladies... you cant allow that sort of thinking to go on in your husbands head. What a man thinks is about 95% of his reality... If He thinks you are young... then you are young in his mind and he will do his best to remain interested in you... If he thinks you are flirting with him and preparing to chase him... then He will do his best to "Bull Up" to satisfy you... But if you allow your relationship to fall into a decline... and leave him thinking you are "Not interested" then his reality becomes "My wife is not interested..." and frustration, anger and aggression may soon become reality followed by a decline in your marriage. If you ware your old Granney Ware... when you know your husband wants you to look "Young, Pretty and Pretty Willing" You are showing him a reality that you are in fact Old... and that the days of your love life are in the past.. and that you no longer have an active interest in his affections... Look our lady.. your headed for a fall.
Men who are happily married do not normally cheat on their spouses without some reason... either provocation from the spouse, lazyness in the relationship that allowed him to go too long without the sex he needed, or some other situation that placed him vulnerable to the advances of some other women.
Why would he even be tempted by another woman? (or Pornography)
Well... does she look at him with interest? (how long has it been since youve looked at him like that?)
Does she clean herself up and pretty herself... Just for him? (How long lady?)
Does she give him value? (Do you??)
Does she recognize that he has needs and tries to meet those needs? (???)
One of the greatest killers of healthy marriages today is Complacency. Lazyness, taking for granted that your spouse will always be there for you... and that it is not necisary to try and please him/her.
I said that last Him / Her because the fact is You Sir can loose your wife the same way that she can lose you. You are great at seeing something like this are relating to it when it is directed toward the wife, But the fact is you can be just as guilty in your own way...
Bottom line is... if you care... Show it. do the things you know they like... things they appreciate. Meet your partners needs and your partner will not have reason to look elsewhere. Ignore your partners needs however and disaster is waiting around the next corner.