- Gender and Relationships»
Is Romance Dead?: Learn What You Can Do to Bring It Back To Life Without Overdoing It
Is the art of romance really gone for good? Can you fall in love on a fixed income or none at all? In 2012, many people are too focused on the fast approaching Presidential election and a crumbling economy to even think about getting romantic with anyone. Some can't even fathom to have that word in their vocabulary. Why go on a date when you can barely pay your electric bill? In the modern age, why go out when you can have our own fantasy life online and avoid rejection entirely? Unfortunately, this type of thinking takes away the idea of human interaction and feeling the natural sparks that could never be emitted from a computer keyboard.
To some, everything needs to change and adjust to the signs of a technology based generation. A lot of people in their twenties would prefer to text than actually talking on the phone. If you're looking to embark on an old fashioned romance, it would be best to put the phone down and actually speak to someone face-to-face. Avoid any type of barriers in order to move on to a whole new dating adventure like Kathleen Turner did in Romancing the Stone. It won't be perfect, but nothing ever is. Here are five suggestions to take when looking to re-ignite your love life, whether it's with someone new or an established partner who has been ignored for too long. Read on to see which path you should take or create your own romantic walkway with its own degree of difficulty.
Examine Your Past Before Moving On- When you ask people, they often say that their biggest relationship roadblock is learning to let go of their baggage. Obsessing over the past keeps them stuck there and unable to move on with their lives. In the movie What's Your Number?, Ally (Anna Faris) is suddenly obsessed with the idea that she has reached her dating limit. She suddenly comes up with the crazy scheme to look up all of her exes and start dating them again to see if it was worth a second look. Sadly, she was right the first time around and didn't expect that her potential Mr. Right (Chris Evans) could be someone else entirely. In the end, it's best to examine your past and try to wipe the slate clean before dating someone new to not ruin a possible love story in the making.
Embrace the Impossible- Is it possible to fall in love with someone you have never seen? That's the premise behind the romantic drama The Lake House. Two lovebirds (Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves) live in different time periods and can only communicate with each other via love letters that they stick in a mailbox. Sounds illogical, but the chemistry of the two stars made it work. In real life, a relationship can suffer long distance problems that can solved with an airplane ticket and not a time machine. Living on different coasts can be solved by long letters, emails, and even many late night phone calls. Your monthly phone bill might be painful to look at for quite a while, but it would be worse not your hear your partner's voice on the other line. Just think about whether it's worth the distance or making the decision to take a job transfer if you can.
Let Yourself Go Online- Okay, this tact might defeat the purpose of trying the traditional dating route, but read further before you dismiss the idea entirely. Once you sort through all the dating crackpots and phonies, you should progress through your online relationship slowly. Maybe start on a friendly basis and see where it goes from there. Gauge where Lover3298 is on the relationship scale. Are they a potential candidate or a potential serial killer in the making? Tread carefully. This approach can be for people who want to write letters, but don't have the time or the penmanship skills to make it work. It might not be traditional, but it's more practical in the long run. A prime example would be You've Got Mail where online lovebirds (Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks) met and bonded over email before they realized their true identities. The best way to get to know one another before meeting for the first time. A rare treat for those looking for love and not get burned.
Learn to Accept The Differences- You might like Country music, but your partner loves Rock music. That could be a relationship killer for some, but that's not the biggest difference you could have to deal with on your road to romance. In the movie Titanic, Jack (Leonardo DiCaprio) was a poor lower class passenger who won a spot on the famous and doomed luxury ship. He meets the wealthy and depressed Rose (Kate Winslet) in a chance encounter that changed their lives forever. Their class differences disappeared whenever they were alone together, but everyone disagreed with them entirely. Not even a sinking ship could keep them apart. Only death could do that. Another reality in embracing your partner's differences would be having to learn to see movies like Titanic one day or The Expendables the next. One hours long sacrifice will go a long way in making someone else happy, even if you're miserable in the process.
Evolution is the Key to Romance- Can you become a better person just by simply being in a relationship? In the movie An Affair to Remember, two lovers (Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr) meet while on vacation and vow to meet up in a year as they tried to tie up loose ends. He worked on developing his painting career and she tried starting up her singing career. Sure, it helped them financially, but their real grow came when they were dealt a more personal blow that impacted them greatly. Could they grow closer or break apart once for all? Another example of evolution would be the movie Eat Pray Love, which followed Elizabeth (Julia Roberts) as she made an extended trip toward self discovery that made her realize that her true love (Javier Bardem) was just around the corner. You just have to learn how to accept it.
Finally, romance is only as dead as you want it to be. This may sound cliche, but you're the one who is ultimately in control of what status your love life should be. Take a chance and learn how to revive without letting your identity take a backseat. Be like Katniss (Jennifer Lawrence) in The Hunger Games. Focus on just getting through the game of life and death before even thinking about choosing between Gale (Liam Hemsworth) or Peeta (Josh Hutcherson). Sure, it's a nice fantasy to be the object of desire for two guys, but it's only a fantasy and not remotely a reality. The best course for a true blue romance would be mix just the right amounts of fantasy and reality to keep things from becoming too boring, which is definitely not in the dating cards anytime soon.