ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Is it possible to love again?

Updated on December 14, 2012

Soul mate Vs Sole mate

Not long ago someone posed the question: Can you be happy with anyone other than your soul mate? There are over 7 Billion people on this planet. In all likelihood there is more than one person for everyone. While I do believe in the concept of a soul mate I do not believe there is "sole-mate" as in only one person who is "perfect" for you. Everyone we fall in love with is "the one" until we realize they are not. As human beings we evolve overtime. Our needs and wants change. What was perfect for you at ages 16, 19, or 25 may not seem so perfect at 35, 45, 55 or beyond. The truth is we may have a number of soul mates over the years. There is no such thing as a “sole mate” as in only (one person) on the whole planet that is like a needle in a haystack where we must invest a lot of energy trying to locate.

Defining Soul Mate

The underlying definition of a "soul mate" is connecting with a person who wants what you want and feels as strongly about you as you do about them. Naturally this would mean if the relationship ended with a breakup or a divorce something changed for one of you. Someone decided his or her life would be better off without the other person in it. If you don't want to be with someone or they don't want to be with you then I would say you are not (life-long) soul mates.

Time Will Tell

Time together is the only way to measure if someone is your (life-long) soul mate. Timing and projection of feelings are two important keys in determining if someone is our soul mate along with chemistry and desire. Since most relationships begin with both people trying to "impress" each other and rarely saying (no) to one another it's natural to feel you’ve met “the one” over and over again. It's not until you see each other's "authentic self" that you feel differently.

Discarding Rose Colored Glasses

Too often people recall a high school or college sweetheart they had that was often their first love and they label him or her as their “soul mate”. Every relationship after that they never came close to having the same depth of intimacy and feelings. However the truth is we refuse to allow ourselves to open up that way again.

It's human nature to romanticize our past or have "selective memories" as well as use the "unforeseen circumstances or obstacles" to enhance our beautiful but tragic ending. In reality if two people (really) want to be together they will do whatever it takes to make it happen! Kings have abdicated their thrones or have gone to war. Men and women have left their spouses with children and so on. We choose to do what we think is in our best interest. If you didn’t stay together then he or she was not “the one”. In a world with more than 7 Billion people in it odds are fairly high there is more than one soul mate for each of us. You just have to be willing to let go of the past, open your heart to receive and give love to another person. It takes more courage to love a second, third, or fourth time but it’s possible.

The concept of "soul mate" is based upon believing our options for love are finite in a world that has infinite possibilities.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)