It's Not Always What You Think

So, it has been years since you've had something interesting happen in your life. You follow the same monotonous routine day after day. One day it becomes to much, so you decide to reconnect with an old friend. Someone you haven't seen in years, a person that you stopped talking to for various reasons. And something cool happens. They respond and you have several small catch up conversations. But then, they decide that they would like to stop talking to you because their significant other believes that you harbor feeling for them. What's worse, they feel the same way. And maybe you do, but for the most part you're just lonely and would like someone to talk to. However, you can't express this to them because you have already let the irrational part of your mind take over. The part that says, "Yes. This friend was someone that I once loved. But that's over, and I have my own life now. But, since they think this of me, there's no changing that." This person, who you thought was your best friend in the world, decides to cut off communications with you. And that, well, that pisses you off. And then things begin to happen.

The situation is then made even worse...by you. Because you, my dear reader, are stubborn and anger makes you irrational. When this friend decides to stop talking to you, you lash out in anger. You decide to go through your entire history with this person. You send messages on social media, through email, ask their friends. And, well, you seem like you're crazy, or at the very least being irrational.

But you're not crazy, are you? You are angry, and with good cause. This person, who you thought was you're friend, has dropped you like a hot sack of potatoes. They have abandoned you at one of the most crucial times of your life. The contact that you are trying to have with this person is a cry for help. But, because you are you, you've done it the wrong way. And that sucks.

I agree fellow reader. It sucks, because you're lonely and dealing with high stress situations. There is no one for you to talk to or relate to because your circle is small. However, I'm here to tell you that I get it. That you have done the research and found that feeling stuck in life, feeling like no one is in your corner, that no one understands you, and like you are slowly going mad, are all symptoms.

They are symptoms of depression. And that's a route that no one should have to take. Because you are special. You can get through it. And, as painful as it is, you have to let that person go. Because that anger you feel is due to a sense of betrayal. It is due to a sense of being forsaken. It is because you over analyze, especially when it comes to someone you care about. And while you have the answer to the problem you have, you might want to find a different way to cope. Loneliness can lead to depression, but it doesn't have to.

Because you can make new friends. You can make new memories. You can find other ways to cope. You find out who your real friends are by the way that they respond to your requests. You find out who they are when you ask them for help, even if it comes off in an absurd way, and they refuse to give it to you.

In this world, you can count the number of true friends on one hand. If they can't see that you're crying for help, or, if they let others get in the way of your well being as their friend, then you probably don't mean anything to them. Because while their relationship to their significant other is important, a real friend would be able to explain the situation to their significant other and still be able to help you.

And you should be able to rely on someone. A significant other is great, but there are some things that you don't necessarily want to talk to them about. That's where your friends come in. You should be able to tell a true friend anything. And a real friend wouldn't make judgments without first understanding the situation. So, I get it. But I also know that you will be fine. It might take some time, but you'll get there.

And lastly, don't forget this: You deserve to be happy no matter what others think.