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Feeling Sexy Just For Yourself is Okay

Updated on August 2, 2012

Sitting around with a group of friends the other day, out of boredom, I was perusing online looking at lingerie. I've been interested in finding a certain style of a bra and panty set without all the wiring and poking and prodding that often times comes with the underwire. I found all kinds that I liked and was ready to purchase. I showed a couple of my girlfriends what I liked and didn't like. Out of the blue two of them kept asking me who I was buying it for. They know, as well as some of you might too, that I'm a single woman. Now whether or not they were just probing me for info to see if I had a new beaux in my life I don't really know but my main question in my head was, "why do I have to buy lingerie for someone else?"

Why didn't they see that I could just be buying pretty frilly things for myself. It's no different than buying a pair of pants for myself or a nice pretty top? Or what about a pair of 4 inch pumps? Are they all for someone else too? No, it's for me to feel good about myself and keeping up my appearances. Well to me buying lingerie for myself is no different. It doesn't mean I'm a sex fiend. And it doesn't mean that I will parade around the house in it with all the windows open for the next door neighbors to see. It just means that I find myself sexy and want to wear sexy things underneath my clothing.

There is nothing at all wrong with this. As a single woman, or married for that matter, how will you feel sexy for your mate if you don't find your own self appealing? How can you possibly have the confidence to parade around in front of them if you feel insecure about your body? It's okay to explore your sexy side with or without your mate. Later on as I thought about my friends asking me that question, I thought to myself that I should have asked them if they did not feel sexy enough to buy themselves lingerie. Do they leave it up to their husbands and boyfriends to buy it for them? And for my friends that are single, do they not buy such things because they feel that they will never meet someone again to wear them for? Well to me that's just negative thinking. I will continue to buy those pairs of lacy panties with matching bras because it makes me feel attractive and alive. I'm not dead just because I'm single. I'm just in between relationships. And when that right guy comes along I will proudly shimmy in front of him in my new unmentionables that no one but him and myself have seen before. And he will appreciate the fact that I exude sexuality and I'm not timid to wear such things in front of him.

So I ask those that think I should only be buying lingerie for "him", why aren't you buying yourself something that makes you feel sexy? Why are you allowing that side of you to remain dormant? Every woman should feel sexy. It doesn't have to be with lingerie. It can be putting on a nice pair of jeans that makes your butt look great. Or a top that may accentuate your bosom just a little bit. How about trying on a pair of pumps that elongate your legs and make them seem endless. Even dabbing on a little eau de toilette can do the trick. So what if I did decide to parade around in my empty apartment feeling sexy. If it makes me realize that I'm a woman and I am desirable, what's wrong with that?


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    • NiaG profile image

      NiaG 5 years ago from Louisville, KY

      Yes we do Cathy! Have a great day!

    • Cathy Fidelibus profile image

      Ms. Immortal 5 years ago from NJ

      We gotta let our goddess show!

    • NiaG profile image

      NiaG 6 years ago from Louisville, KY

      And there's nothing wrong with it! :-)

    • wrinklestudent profile image

      wrinklestudent 6 years ago from Richmond, Virginia

      Sexy undies are a great way to feel attractive when I have to wear unattractive clothes somewhere. Totally for me.


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