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On the outside looking in

Updated on May 13, 2012

My brother

no longer a jail bird i do love him no matter what
no longer a jail bird i do love him no matter what | Source

Just Writing


A few weeks ago I saw a post on face book by one of my nephews friends, this is what it read; “I love my soon to be hubby and I am so glad he is out of the hole, now he can call me and I can hear his sexy voice”! Now for some reason at times, she pops into my head; I don’t know if it is because I feel bad for her or because I know many women who are kind of in the same situation.



Does it matter or when is it okay to be in a relationship with someone who is in prison or in jail? I know there are many different situations because I have been in one of these situations before, and its mind boggling to think that a young woman would actually choose to be with someone they met while they were incarcerated when there are so many men out here.



I am going to write about a few of the differ situations and you decide whether or not it makes you discombobulated in the way it makes me!

First of all the relationship where a couple has been together or married for a while and the man (this can be vise versa as well) makes a bad choice in life that causes him to end up in prison for a while and therefore, the significant other makes that honorable choice to stick by their side, now this is understandable.

Another type of situation is when a guy has been incarcerated and gets' out meets a pretty nice young lady and then gets into to trouble and bam back to jail/prison! So the young lady decides to wait for this guy because he is going to do about a year or maybe less. However, he gets out and bam back in jail again, now these two individuals have no ties; no kids, and not married, none the less she still stays in the relationship; now this is the type of relationship that get's my mind boggling.

Last but not least this relationship is somewhat confusing because the man is already incarcerated when the woman meets him (per-say). For instance a friend of hers is already in a relationship with a man who is incarcerated and asks another female whether a friend or cousin if she would write or go with her to go visit her man and has a friend that she can see while she is there too. So she does it and from there on they keep in contact by writing letters and visits. Sometimes I wonder why a beautiful, young, and educated lady would choose to have a relationship like so. On the other hand I start to realize that men out here are worse to be in a relationship with most of the time because they cheat and in jail or prison they can’t really cheat, unless but that's another story! Also men don’t appreciate what they have and don’t know what a women’s worth is or just forgets and doesn’t make her feel like anything special. When a man is incarcerated all they have is their words to live by and can they speak some kind wonderful words to a woman that make her feel so beautiful and like the queen of his heart! One more thing when a man is incarcerated they work out most of the time and eat all their meals, therefore they are healthy and a lot of them are very good looking!

Well I guess there can be different views of these situations but it’s kind of poignant any way I look at it, I guess! What are your thoughts on this? Thanks for reading……


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    • rahul0324 profile image

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Sometimes there are no logical explanations to anything. i believe any educated woman who is not in a married relation will surely let the man go, but sometimes fear may creep in :

      like many women may well fear that if they let the man go.. he might strike back after he is free... (just a thought)

      Some may believe he was innocent and has been a victim of unfair judgement...

      We can put many viable psychological explanations to it, but the best answer i think lies with these ladies!

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