- Gender and Relationships
Learn natural social skills
Do not think by words
It is a common error that a person thinks by word like blocks instead of by one's memories of experiences. Like "this is my hand" instead of sensing all the social, emotional, physical and atmospheric sensations in your hand and in the wide social space around it.
By putting your experiences to words you replace the multitude of your social observations by one remembered school book picture like block which does not tell anything of the masses of fine sensitive information that you EXPERIENCE in the situation.
Instead of doing the error, don't do anything: just experience the situation and you'll be many times wiser! Such is the wisdom of your instinct nature...
Realx in a LIVELY way
When you relax, your senses open and you experience life richer.
Ordinarily you are preoccupied, doing many things at once, following your own idea of what is a good strategy in life and that is like as if you were carrying numerous boxes: those are your arrangements. But when you relax, you kind of drop those boxes away and gain a new freedom to do whatever you want. You get your full capacity into use. For example you notice maybe a tenfold or a hundredfold number of things each moment, or even more! Such increase in your observational capacity removes needless collisions with others: you have lost false opinions and gained an insight to how the social life works. Such insight is in your nature! The natural human living in healthy ways according to feelings while having a holistic awareness of the world at large, is socially wise - the wisest that you can be...
This relaxedness is not a death like slumber. It is instead an alive thing, like music is alive, like animals are. Just follow your feelings and you will gain an insight into what it is like.
"Live and let others live!"
In social life you cannot forc people. You must see into their nature and let them be just what they are and build your strategies on that.
Friendliness takes you far. Start by being selfishly self-nurturing and you will have lots of good will to pour on others - but the good will lasts only as long as you are primarily following your own feelings. "Livee and leet others live!" is a good rule to follow. If you take it diligently, it can serve as the only moral that you have - just use a holistic view of life and of the world together with it. It will make you happy and free, and your social life becomes harmonical and flourishing: you will see what makes others tick.
It works also in emergencies
Be a happy kind of fellow
"I love happy Life
like most of the others - like You too!
So I take happy Life as my value in the world."
You can win friends everywhere if you are a pleasant happy kind of fellow who understands others.
That is also a way to build a better world, to do your share for a good future for all!
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