7 Unusual Habits of Men

I recently acquired two roommates after living alone for about a year and a half. The interesting part is that these two new roomies happen to be males, while I happen to be female.

I have lived with men before. In college I lived in a mixed gender house; but that was college, you expect it to be loud and dirty and you expect to eat romen and pizza all the time (or pokey sticks...you U of I grads know what I mean!). I also lived with men that I was in relationships with (and I have hubs about how men behaved in that scenario, if you are interested).

This is a different scenario. I am an adult. My roommates are adults. I'm not in a relationship with either of them. It is a unique dynamic. I've ventured into some uncharted territory, and I'm excited to share some of the things that I've learned along the way.

1. They are unable to change a toilet paper roll. My roommates seem to not understand how that little metal piece pops out. They know where to get the new roll, but not where to put it. Whenever the toilet paper runs out, I can find the new roll either on top of the toilet, or on top of the empty roll. Mysterious.

2. They use the remote while eating. They also do not understand that when they eat, their fingers get greasy. They will reach for the remote, the door knob, or anything else that they need prior to using a napkin or washing their hands. I now have to wet wipe all of my door knobs and remotes on an almost weekly basis.

3. They must watch every single football game. I love football, so this isn't that huge of a deal. I always make sure I watch my Bears every week. But I don't understand the need to watch every single NFL and every single college game regardless of the team. The only answer I get is "it's football". They don't want to go anywhere or do anything because two tier 2 college teams are playing; because "it's football".

4. They have a video game addiction. Whether it is a silly Facebook game like Family Feud or a hardcore PS2 game like God of War, I can not pull them away from a video game. They will sit in front of a computer or television for hours on end playing these games. They will pull all -nighters to "level up", whatever that means. It is like they really are saving the world with their cute little controller.

5. They drink; A LOT! I'm not even talking about alcohol (although they do indulge occasionally). I used to buy a 24 pack of bottled water, and it would last me about 2 weeks. Now I am lucky if it lasts 2 days. I would be upset if I found full water bottles all over the house, but this isn't the case. They each actually drink about 8 full bottles of water per day. They don't even do anything physical. I would die if I drank that much water. I would throw up if I drank just 3. They are now responsible for ensuring that there is water in the house.

6. They look at all women. Yes, the stereotype is true. Men look at all women as possible sexual partners. It is biology, they can't really help it. I was playing an old school PlayStation 2 game with one of my roomies, and the bartender character was a girl with rather large endowments. My roommate catcalled her. She is a video game character! And not even one with good graphics! They also pause the football games to get a look at the cheerleaders. They talk about all the hot girls they saw at target. They just can't help themselves.

7. They are extremely loyal. These two guys who I live with have been friends for about three years. Sometimes they yell at each other, and once they have even thrown fists. But, if someone were to try to get between them, if someone were to try to hurt one, the other would be there on a seconds notice and have his back. They can hate each other one minute, and will be defending each other to the death the next. As the other roommate, I am also a part of this fierce loyalty. They have taken care of stalkers for me (I use that term loosely). They defend my honor when we go out. They are always willing to fight for me if it looks as though someone is trying to hurt me. They always have my back, no matter what.

Despite the gross weird habits, I love my male roomies. The good weird habits (my favorite being the loyalty) definitely outweigh the bad.

It is very different than any of my other experiences living with men. We are all adults, so we all know how to clean up after ourselves. We all help with the cooking. We all help with the cleaning. Other than the "greasy fingers" problem, they understand that the house needs to stay clean. They also treat me as an equal roommate. I am not expected to "play mommy" to either of them. I don't do their laundry (I did teach the one how to do his own though). We have a very respectful and mutually beneficial living arrangement. I love my roomies, and I don't think I would be as happy with a female roommate.