- Gender and Relationships»
Marriage today: Is it really til' death do us part?
My insight into today's standards when it comes to marriage. Bringing love and commitment back.
It seems like everybody is giving up on love. Love is missing in households, communities, music, and society overall. No wonder why forty to fifty percent of married couples in the United States divorce. This saddens me simply because I feel as if people are just using divorce as a cop out and not fighting for the love that they once believed was there. Im not saying that nobody should divorce because you never know someones situation (Domestic violence and disrespect should never be tolerated), but in terms of things that are not as serious and how it's being allowed to separate couples. People have lost their will to fight for who they love. I believe that once you make that vow and promise " til death do you part" you are obligated to stay with that person no matter what happens and work out whatever issue is destroying your relationship. So many times today many couples separate and file for divorce just because the option is simply there, forgetting the vow they promised to one another and made to God.
I honestly just get a different vibe when it comes to love and marriage because of the music that is created today and what is portrayed in the media. In today's music "love" is not talked about or encouraged like it was when my parents were growing up. Instead today people are rapping about drugs, sex, and money. No love family, or staying together (unity). We don't even have any young entertainers ( for example, Jackson 5, Sammie, B2K, Cherish, Pretty Ricky, Destiny's Child). I feel like this is disappointing because we don't have people in our generation singing and rapping about positive and loving things. Most people are listening to Chief Keef ( I'm guilty at times smh) while he disrespects females calling us thots and rap about what drugs he's consuming and how much money he blowing. Like how is this helping your people though? Then in regards to television and media overall we have shows like Love and Hip Hop Atlanta giving a negative example and horrible portrayl of the African-American community. We got men like Kirk who does nothing but cheat on his beautiful wife Rasheeda and Young Joc who messes with multiple females and the list goes on. But my thing is, what is that showing us? Its doing nothing but feeding trash to society and encouraging this immature and disrespectful behavior. What happened to The Proud Family? The Cosby show? Family Matters? The Fresh Prince of Bel Air?Hell! The Brady Bunch??? People clearly only follow what they see. The thing I have a problem with is that in today's marriages people are not communicating how thy feel and they allow things that make them uncomfortable to occur for years and wait until it all builds up and file for a divorce instead of rectifying the issue when you first see it. SPEAK UP! We need a reality check and I'm ringing y'all doorbells because it's getting out of hand! As a community and as a people we need to remember how far we have come. We are doing exactly what our oppressors want us to do when we separate and fight instead of love one another and unite. Ladies, if you and your husband are going through it, it's okay! Nobody is perfect and every couple has their moments. But you have to remember there is a reason you fell in love and married this man (NEVER FORGET!) Y'all better work through your issues. Walking away from your companion and family won't solve anything but only leave a void. We're better together ladies, and that's with anything. Without love, life is nothing. Cherish it. Protect it. Encourage it. But most of all love it! And just remember " I do" is more than two words. It means that you vow to work through whatever adversities you two face together as one. We have to take control of our situation and don't allow it to take control of you. Half the time children are involved and you guys aren't therefore the only ones hurting. Now your kids have no idea what to look up to or if love is even real. Remember it's all a cycle. Know who you are committing to and make certain to put God at the head of your marriage. Without him and prayer of course your marriage failed because nothing is possible without him. Overall, I just want us to do better as a people. Love and support each other. Don't lose hope. We all make mistakes and no one is perfect. I hope this message helps someone. Remember you are beautiful and God loves you!