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Master the Situation - How to Be in Control in the Midst of a Negative Surrounding

Updated on September 6, 2017
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Matthew is a college student who is passionate about writing. He lives in Nigeria, West Africa.

Do you have to get mad when that guy does something annoying to you? Do you have to be intimidated by everything that happens? Do you have to react hysterically to what’s going on in your surrounding? Of course not!

You can make a decision to be master of the situation. You can decide to be the lion in the jungle. You can always be cool and in control all the time. It’s in you. All you have to do is to be in alignment with your positive inner being.

Deep down inside you is that fellow who never gets intimidated; never frightened by anything; doesn’t get mad over petty things; is always in control all the time.

Some people call this consciousness; others call it being in alignment with your vortex; I call it being in alignment with your positive inner being.

Be Cool!

You know, whenever something unseemly is happening around you, say, someone obnoxious is trying to disturb you, naturally, the first response to such is usually a negative one—a repugnant feeling of disgust. But you see, feelings are nothing more than a physiological response to a mental state. In other words, your feelings is not you, it’s only a signal to what you’re thinking at that moment.

Your feelings, usually the negative or bad ones, shouldn’t be the parameter with which you gauge the level of detestability or otherwise of what’s happening around you. You shouldn’t let your feeling decide your response to your immediate surroundings. In fact, your feeling is what has to be altered, not what’s happening around you.

Your feelings are only signals to your current line of thoughts. They are not to be taken as authentic or reliable. There has to be a distinction between what you’re thinking and how you want to think. And before that can happen, you must see your feelings for what they really are—pointers to the content of your thinking, they help you see what your thoughts look like through the physiological vibrations—feeling—they stair up in you.

Of course, it’s very easy to look up into your head and try to see what you’re currently thinking about, but the problem is, when we’re feeling a certain way, we tend to forget that our feelings are only a direct function of our thoughts, hence, we fail to use our feelings as an opportunity to scrutinize and adjust our thoughts instead, we allow them form the basis for our actions, even stupid actions.

It’ll be more judicious if we see our feelings more as warning flags or pointers to the kinds of thoughts we are thinking instead of seeing them as directive signals to the kind of reaction or response we should have towards what’s going on in our surroundings.

A negative feeling shouldn’t necessarily result in a negative action, much preferably, negative feelings should be seen as warning flags to negative thoughts, that way, you’ll be more conscious of changing your thoughts more than acting with much irrationality.

If you like how you feel, then continue. But if you don’t, you must change your thinking to one that makes you feel good. The good thing about feelings is that good feelings are signals to good or positive thoughts while uneasy or bad feelings are signals to bad thoughts.

Hence the long and short of mastering any situation is to have the right kind of thought irrespective of what’s happening around. You must have a positive perspective of what’s happening around you.

The Good In the Bad

Being positive isn’t something that you can let happen by yourself. It might occur that in a long while you’ll barely feel positive, and out of sheer ignorance, you might just let yourself sway in the dirty world of negativism like a slovenly boy living in a disheveled attic, thinking he can’t help staying there, instead of taking the conscious act of coming out of the filth and stay in the unpolluted world of positivity—where everything is always in order.

Positivity thrives more in an arena where there’s an initial instance of negativity. Come to think of it, if there’s no darkness, light would be unnecessary. If there are no sick people, Doctors would be useless. If there were no criminals, the police would be unnecessary. Accordingly, if there’s no negative situation, positivity would be of no use.

That should suggest to you that being positive in a negative situation is like choosing to proffer a solution to a problem. It’s light shining light on a dark world. And if that’s the case, you would agree with me that running away from a negative situation wouldn’t be a smart way to deal with the problem.

In other words, don’t see the problems as a ‘problem’, see it as an opportunity. You see, in every room or auditorium, the light bulbs are usually place in the center of the room so its effect could be felt in every corner of the room. The light bulbs were put right in the middle of darkness, not so that they would get scared of the darkness but so they would be able to shine their lights more effectively against the darkness in the room.

What am I saying? The solution to a problem is usually not discovered when one chooses to stay at a distance from the problem. The problem isn’t necessarily a ‘problem’ until you act like it is by running away from it.

Outside the problem, there’s no chance of finding a solution. However, when you hang around long enough, you’ll begin to see things in a more suitable way. Frankly, your perspective view of the problem is what matters not the problem itself. If you see the problem as a problem, and run away from it, then it’s really a problem, but if you see it as an opportunity to change things for the better, and stay close to it, then it becomes an opportunity indeed.

If you’ll take your minds off how big the problems is or how intimidating it is or how much it makes you fear, and see it as an opportunity, you’ll get more out of the problem and will be able to take advantage of it, instead of it taking advantage of you.

Be In Alignment

As stated earlier, your inner being is always positive; it’s never negative. That’s why I called it your ‘positive inner being’. Do you know that when you meet, say, an obnoxious person, and you begin to develop a negative feeling of uneasiness as a result that person’s obnoxiousness. In such a scenario, it’s important to note that your negative feeling of repugnance isn’t an indication that your inner being is also feeling repugnant; your feeling of repugnance is only a direct function of your current line of thoughts.

What you have to do then is change your thinking and make it to be more in alignment with the positive nature of the core of your being—your inner being.

Deep down inside you, you don’t want to be negative, and are not negative, but due to your ignorance, you allowed your feelings to hold sway, and let it control your response to the situation. What you should do whenever you have a negative feeling is to ask yourself, “I know what I want, I don’t want to be negative, what is it that I do want?” And from there, your mind automatically begins to look for ways to be positive instead of being negative about the situation.

When you allow your mind to manufacture ways by which you could be positive about the situation, it’ll take a whole new light and you’ll begin to see things from a new perspective, thus always being in alignment with your inner being. That way, you’ll always be unshaken like a monolith, in control, and master of the situation irrespective of how negative the surrounding is.

© 2017 Matthew Joseph


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    • matthewjoe1 profile image

      Matthew Joseph 4 months ago from Nigeria

      Thanks for your comment. I appreciate you. Hub pages is really a great place for writers to blossom. I'm happy I found out about such a place as this.

    • vocalcoach profile image

      Audrey Hunt 4 months ago from Nashville Tn.

      What a fantastic hub! You're off to a great start. We all could use some help in dealing with negative situations and you've provided just the right ingredients.

      Thanks for following me and welcome to hub pages.