Nagging Can Destroy Your Marriage
Nagging Can Destroy Your Marriage
Many authors have defined nagging in different ways. Meanwhile, Encarta English Dictionary defined nagging in three ways; 1. Asking somebody persistently and annoyingly to do something; 2. Always finding fault with somebody regularly and repeatedly; and lastly 3. To be a persistent cause of discomfort, anxiety, or unease to somebody. Question I keep asking myself is that, is nagging associated with women because they like to express themselves through talking? Women expresses themselves through speaking out their mind, but most times it is branded as nagging meanwhile women cannot help expressing themselves when they are burdened by something.
There are lots of things that incites Women to start talking, things like spouse or husband keeping late night and not giving them the desired attention. Hence, the next option is to complain, and complain matured to nagging, and nagging graduates to being troublesome in their homes. Though it's frustrating when ones spouse keep coming home very late than usual, notwithstanding nagging is not the best option because it could worsen the situation, which will not be healthy for intimate relationship.
There was this woman, her sweet, caring and loving husband suddenly turned to a drunker and keep late at night. The frustrated woman resorted to nagging, to the extent she start calling her husband names “useless man, stupid man” bla bla bla and yet there was no change instead he now turned her into punching bag. This woman became more frustrated, there was no peace in their home, she has gone to their relatives whether they would talk sense into her husband to no avail, rather she would receive more beating “so you have the gut to go and discuss my issues with people, useless woman” her husband shouted at her. If he said ten words that were how many blows the woman received.
Apparently, the woman went to a native doctor as one of her friend advised her and when she got there, she explained her predicament to him. "Please I need a charm which will make my husband to love me the way he does before his sudden change of attitude". The native doctor listened with interest until she ended her appeal after which he gave her one substance in a liquid form, which he put inside a small plastic container and instructed her on how and when to use it for effective result. “Whenever your husband comes home very late as usual, greet him and immediately he enters the house, quickly run inside your room and sip a little from this container and hold it in your mouth, do not swallow it yet and do not say a word to him either. Make sure the rooms were properly taken care of, do the laundry, serve his food, and put water in the bathroom for him to take his bath afterwards you can swallow the liquid in your mouth. And any day he demands to make love to you do not hesitate and finally make sure your hair-do is the style he appreciates and remember to put on sexy dress. After two weeks interval come back and tell me the result and his reactions” the native doctor instructed.
Nagging can destroy your marriage
Meanwhile, the desperate woman listened keenly and did as she was instructed by the native doctor. After a week interval, her husband became confused and started wondering, “how come this woman suddenly stop stalking me and does things she stopped doing long ago?” With remorse and guilty conscience the man knelt down before his wife and begged her for forgiveness for beating her up and other bad things he did to her. The woman who was eagerly waiting for her lost husband to come back to his senses cried aloud while he was begging her on his kneels. And afterwards they became lovers again; the intimacy grew stronger and stronger, the yoke has been broken. Neighbours where amazed because they did not know what intrude between them that aroused the sudden affection towards each other like a newly wedded couple. This happy woman could not wait till two weeks before she ran back to the native doctor to testify and when she got there, she started thanking him for saving her marriage. “My dear daughter, you should understand something” The native doctor said “the problem in your marriage was not fully your fault but the way you handle the situation was wrong” he pointed out, the woman looked at him with surprise written all over her face “I did not prepare any charm for you” the man continued. “What I gave you was ordinary water” the man affirmed, and after he gave her some piece of advice this woman went home crying for joy and as well felt remorse for how poorly she handled the problem by nagging that lead to its escalating to the level it got to, which nearly destroy her marriage.
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Where She got it wrong
- She Complain all the time without giving her husband a breathing space.
- Her dressing sense was zero, you know most women tend to stop dressing well almost immediately they got married. Remember men are moved by what they see, what if he was attracted to you because of your good dressing sense? And now that you are married, anything goes. Just so you know, you might be pushing your spouse outside, i mean pushing him to start looking at other women. In the case of the woman in this article, one of the problem is that she does not dress attractively anymore, though her husband should have told her but some men does not know how to communicate. Men should learn how to communicate more especially in relationship, through communication, any issue can be resolved.
You can learn from this woman, whether you are the nagging type or you have just found out some funny habits being exhibited by your spouse, it might be too much alcohol intake, coming home late etc. You can handle him with love and respect, although it is not always easy. Just take care of him the way you would take care of yourself and hoping he/she changes for better. There is no perfect man or woman out there, everybody has one fault or the other, therefore try as much as you can to maintain the intimacy, learn to forgive your spouse and let your love for each other grow as days goes by and keep the fire which started the relationship burning in so doing your marriage will be the best in the whole world.
© 2010 Ijeoma Peter