- Gender and Relationships»
Oh boy- Starting a New Romance
This is always SO confusing!
Okay, you're interested, he/she is interested. The interest factor is usually the easy part to determine. IF you do have trouble seeing the signs, look for these things:
Playful banter, risque speak, hitting, nudging- any physical contact that could be written off as playful. Pay careful attention to hints, body language [ such body language could be putting one's hands in the pockets (this shows an unconscious connection with the genital regions and buttocks- NOT exactly "public domain"]. Any such physical contact shows a desire to be physically closer.
Also, pay attention to hints such as "we should go there together some time", or any such thing. These are almost Freudian slips. The unconscious being will always try to express what's uncomfortable in a covert manner. This makes the denial of such intentions easy. People HATE rejection. This is why a new dating experience is potentially more stressful than it is enjoyable!
So, now you're alone. This is the time when both are thinking "really, is this gonna happen?" DO NOT F this part up! One of the most magical things about a first kiss is the release that we feel when it finally happens. The anticipation is part of what makes the culmination of those feelings so wonderful, isn't it. This anticipation translates into every facet of a romantic relationship between a man and woman, a man and man, a woman and woman. If you think about it our sexual contact can be better enjoyed the same way- a partners touch or kiss "near" where you'd like it, but then backed away- only to return ever so slightly- back again... you understand.
Outside the physical, many words are exchanged during this courting and initial romance stage. You MUST consider those words-- every single one of them! Speaking bullshit, just to "get in the door" is the biggest mistake that most couples make from the onset. Don't be on your "best behavior". Be yourself. If "yourself" isn't good enough for this conquest, well, it sure as shit won't be later once that initial thrill is gone!
Believe me, I am not trying to make myself out to be some love-guru. I've had many failed relationships. I can say without a doubt, though, that all of the most recent were not destroyed by me (and I'm taking that from the numerous conversations). I'm also taking it from a unique perspective.
I could seriously go on for pages and pages about this! I will add content as I get some more input from my readers. I'm a firm believer in teaching in small steps. Too much information is exactly that. You lose your audience after too long. So, more later, friends :-)