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Online Dating Tips for Women - Getting Started

Updated on August 21, 2011

Let's face it ladies, Mr. Right is not hanging out in the romance novel section of your local Barnes and Noble. Well, ok, he might be. But that guy's probably looking for his own Mr. Right - which takes us straight back to square one. Guess where else Mr. Right isn't? Everywhere you've been looking lately. If he were, you wouldn't be reading this.

Don't worry, you're not alone. I can't begin to tell you how many women I know - both young and not so young - who simply cannot find a man. If you're among the scores of women who've grown frustrated with traditional dating methods, this article is for you.

(Note: This article is going to address mainstream dating. By that, I mean dating of a purely "vanilla" nature - nothing kinky or fetish related. So if you're in the market for a Dom, switch or sub, stay tuned and I'll get my tips on that lifestyle posted as soon as possible.)

Right, let's get started.

Online dating. Go ahead, you can say it out loud - nobody's going to laugh at you. Why not? Cos, odds are, they've used one an online dating service themselves, at some point. That stigma that used to accompany personals ads in the Sunday Times? Gone. This is '07, baby - nothing is taboo these days. Get your game face on and get out on the field before Mr. Right gets tackled by someone else.

The first step is finding a well-maintained site that sees a lot of action. You don't want to be signing up for dating scene that boasts 20 members who haven't been online since May 2002. You want a site that has lots and lots of choices, because you're not going to settle for Mr. Maybe.

In my opinion, is probably the site on which you'll find the highest quality men. Yeah, I know, I say that like you're in the market to buy one. Guess what? You ARE. We're not looking to rent. We want a man who's going to increase in value over the years! You don't go shopping for a mansion in a trailer park, do you?

Of course not. Which brings me to my next cliché - you've got to spend money to make money. is not free. But neither is it going to break the bank, unless yours is pink with a squiggly little tail. Why do we want to spend money on a subscription? Because men don't invest unless they are serious. And if they've got a subscription on a clean-cut site like Match, they are, at the least, seriously considering settling down. That doesn't mean they're going to - but it does weed out a good deal of the guys looking for a one night stand.

My preference for Match came from spending a great deal of time trolling other online dating services which just didn't impress me overmuch. Most of them seemed like meat markets to me. That said, you might find them perfectly suitable. The most popular (in no particular order) seem to be the following:,,, (seniors dating service), (Jewish dating service), (single parent dating service), (Muslim dating service), (Christian dating service), (African American dating service), (BBW dating service), (dating service for those with incurable STD's), (find a man in uniform!).

Phew! That's a lot of sites. And there are plenty more on the net, these are just a few. I'm not endorsing them, just passing them along to you. Next step? Take a look at those relevant to you and surf around as much as you can. You might be required to register first - that's fine, but don't whip the credit card out until you've found the one you really want.

Once you've made your choice, see my next article, which will include tips for choosing a good a user name. One that will draw the kind of man you want, and repel those you don't. Believe me, it's more important than you realize. So go on, you - surf those sites and choose the one you find most appealing. And then come back here for part two!

xx Isabella


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