- HubPages»
- Gender and Relationships»
- Relationship Problems & Advice
Only Cheaters Stay With Cheaters? What Do You Think?
Does your partner cheat on you? Do you forgive him? Are you cheating as well?
Some people believe that only someone who is cheating themselves, will forgive their cheating partner. Or at some point they have cheated. Cheating is the worst kind of betrayal you could do to someone you love. It opens so many other doors of the heart. The deeper the love, the deeper the betrayal.
Cheating means lying, and that usually ends in disaster. Nobodys perfect and we all make mistakes . Cheating is not a mistake. It is a choice. So just remember if you are caught cheating, and your partner forgives you; Think about the Whys? Yep she has already cheated on you or is cheating on you.
What do you think?
Who do you think cheats on thier partners more?
What sre some signs your partner is cheating on you?
- His routine has changed.(coming home late, not answering phone, not eating much dinner.)
- Starts brushing his hair, wearing cologne, buying new clothes.
- Some men tend to get a little more sexual when they are cheating.
- Missing money, or more spending not from you.
- Puts a password on his phone or keeps it on him at all times.
Honestly no one deserves to be cheated on. It hurts and causes people to not trust anymore. If you want to be with someone else, brake up. It is not fare and causes depression,suicidal thoughts,anger,sometime even death. Love one another.
You only have 1 heart. Take care of it.
© 2017 Leanne Doyle M
Related
Comments
LDM,
Everyone has their own "deal breaker" list.
If cheating is a "deal breaker" for someone it shouldn't matter if their spouse is the president of the U.S. or a mail man.
Having said that people have been known to stay in physically abusive relationships because they were "in love". Whatever you or I could come up with there are people who are living under those conditions who have no plans of ever leaving.
The reality is cheating is NOT a "deal breaker" for everyone.
What I gave you wasn't "my opinion" just a fact of life.
Life is a (personal) journey. It's not a one size fits all world.
Well thank you for your opinion.I still dont agree with you though.. But thats fine to. I believe Hilery, Jackie and Corretta, stayed with husbands because of the position they were in. In my opinion unless you Have cheated, are cheating, or wana cheat, will you be more likely to stay with a cheater. How could you be madley in love with someone who would hurt you and humiliate you by cheating on you? I understand love doesnt just go away like that, but its definatly the beginning of the end. I respect your opinion and everybodys opinion for that matter.
No, I believe some people stay with cheaters because they're madly in love with their mate/spouse. They may stay for the sake of the children or financial benefits. Others simply do not love themselves enough to walk away.
And then there are those who might not really care because they feel "the other" is doing whatever they don't want to do.
(They just want discretion.)
Coretta Scott King stayed with Martin Luther King, Jackie Kennedy stayed with John F. Kennedy and Hillary Clinton stayed with Bill Clinton just to name a few.
To my knowledge no one has ever accused these women of cheating on their husbands.
Having said that when it comes to cheating neither gender is standing on "holy ground". Anyone who has ever watched TV shows like "Cheaters", "Paternity Court" or "The Maury Povich Show: AKA "You are NOT the father!" is aware that women cheat. In fact lesbians have reported having their female lovers cheat on them too. Both cheating and monogamy are (choices).
The goal of most cheaters is to hold onto all that is "good" in their primary relationship while addressing their other "needs" on the side. Very few cheaters are looking to (replace) one relationship with another. They want to "compliment" what they already have. Whatever they deem to be (missing) in their relationship does not rise to the level of being a "deal breaker". If it did they would have chosen to end the relationship. From their point of view they (chose) to cheat in order to stay in the relationship.
There are 3 basic types of cheaters
1. The Incessant Cheater
This person has never been faithful long-term! Monogamy for them is like going on a very strict diet. It's not a matter of (if) they will cheat but rather (when) they will cheat.
They bore easily and are always on the hunt for the thrill that comes with being with someone (new).
Their motto: "Variety is the spice of life!"
2. The Unbelievable Opportunity Cheater
This person is not "proactively" looking to cheat. They may believe someone is "hot looking" or have a secret crush and one day this person actually flirts with them! There's an indication they can turn a fantasy into reality. There may be an instance where their mate is going to be out of town or otherwise occupied which reduces their odds of being caught. This cheater caves in to temptation.
Note: Sometimes they may confess weeks, months, or years later to relieve themselves of feelings of guilt.
3. The Discontented Cheater
He/she blames you!
If you hadn't done or stopped doing whatever they never would have stepped outside of the relationship. In other words they blame you for (their) actions.
People who have been betrayed however will sometimes buy into this explanation because it means that (they) might be able to "change" and thus cause their mate to be faithful. They feel "empowered" where as the other two types of cheaters makes them feel powerless because they feel they could not have done anything to prevent it.
Subconsciously one of the reasons that we ask cheaters (why) is because we're hoping to find a reason to justify forgiving them and staying in the relationship.
If cheating is a "deal breaker" for you there's no reason to ask why.
3