ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

How to Pray After A Spouse Cheats on You

Updated on January 11, 2016

Divorce in America

It has been reported that over 50% of Americans are divorced. That's a lot of people with broken hearts. How do you recover after infidelity? How do you trust anyone after being cheated on and lied to?

What A Broken Heart Looks Like

Trust and Relationships

For me the hardest thing to accept was that he lied. He broke my trust. I thought one thing and he thought another. The communication in the relationship was not there. I had to seek professional help - with or without him. It really does come down to detaching from the situation. I had to get help. My mind was fried. I couldn't make one good decision. I was too close.

Getting help from a Pastor, a Mentor, or a qualified Christian Counselor is imperative. I needed someone neutral to talk to. And I needed the space to vent my feelings and an objective viewpoint to see if I was the crazy one. And I wanted to know how to rebuild my life - with or without him.


Have you ever been cheated on?

See results

Establishing Healthy Relationship Boundaries

One of the things I had to learn was how to construct healthy boundaries in my life. Imagine yourself as a house. And you have a yard with a fence all around your property. It keeps the stray dogs out. And the stray people. Your house has a door and you get to decide who to allow in and who not to. You also have a gate in your fence. That way you can let the good in and let the bad out. There are times that I let people in my yard and in my house that I should not have. I needed a door to kick them out of. I needed a gate in my fence to let them out.I had to decide for myself what I would allow in and what I would not allow on my property and in my house.

What about you?

What are your boundaries?

What will you allow and what will you not allow?

The choice is yours - it's your life.

Are you ready to make some boundaries?

Check out this book on BOUNDARIES - it helped me learn what a boundary was and how to make one.

Restoring Yourself After a Cheating Spouse

After an affair, it is natural to have feelings of inadequacy, or feeling not good enough. This is a lie. You are good enough. God made you good. You did not cheat - he did. Yes, You were the victim, but that doesn't mean it has to stay this way.

1. Give yourself permission to feel.

Talk, shout, pray to God - tell Him how you feel too.Write about it. Talk to the counselor about it. Just get it out. Burying your feelings now might make you sick later. Bring them into the light.

2. Give yourself permission to take a break to evaluate the relationship.

You don't need all the answers today. Trust that God will continue to show you what to do next.

3. Seek professional help.

I did not know what a normal relationship was. I knew how to be the victim. I did not know how to stand up for myself. I had to learn. I had to learn what boundaries are and how to enforce them.

You have choices too. You don't have to pretend it didn't happen. God made you His Princess - forever. Admit that you may have 'cast your pearls before swine ' and trusted someone you probably shouldn't have.

5. Come up with an action plan

Have one plan together and one separate. What is acceptable and what is not in a relationship? What is the consequence if one or both of you don't follow the plan?

6. Do something nice for yourself - by yourself.

It is good to have time to be alone. It's ok to cry. You will get through this.

7. Be ready to enforce whatever you decide.

Truthfully, he may or may not change. That is his choice. Own your choices. If he continues to cheat are you ok with that? Don't lie to yourself.

Isaiah 58:11

God is Your Husband

“Do not fear, for you will not be ashamed;

Neither be disgraced, for you will not be put to shame;

For you will forget the shame of your youth,

And will not remember the reproach of your widowhood anymore.

For your Maker is your husband,

The Lord of hosts is His name;

And your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel;

He is called the God of the whole earth. (Isaiah 54:-4-5 NKJV)

Infographic on Divorce in America


Prayers for Healing a Broken Heart

Dear Lord,

You know I am a mess. You know that I gave myself to someone who did not remain faithful. Betrayed by the one that I thought loved me. I don't understand. I am so broken. I can't believe this is happening to me. I thought we would be together forever. I thought he would be faithful. He promised me. But he lied. What do I do now?

Lord, I need You to lead me. You promised you would guide me, even through the valley of death. The relationship I thought I had was a lie. I don't know where to go. I don't know who I am anymore. Lord, you told me you would never leave me nor forsake me. You told me You would be faithful to me, more faithful than a brother. I need you now.

There needs to be a consequence for his unfaithfulness. Help me Lord to know what that should be. I can't pretend it didn't happen. I wanted the truth. And even though it hurts, I am glad that You brought this darkness into the light. I would rather know - than not know.

Lead me Lord. Help me know what Your plan is for me. If he repents, let me forgive him. I don't know how Lord, but I trust You to help me. But if he doesn't, then let me respect his choice to wander and move on, whatever that may mean. Deserters used to be killed in the Armed Service. I won't kill him Lord, even though I want to. But I am trusting You to take care of this. You said vengeance is Yours and You would repay. I trust You alone Lord. I don't want to be alone. You are my husband now, in Jesus Name.

You Are a Princess

© 2014 Diana Rasmussen


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)