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Pre-Date Hygiene Tips For Men

Updated on September 28, 2009

I realize hygiene is a pretty basic thing, and most men are pretty clued-in as to what ought to be cleaned, and with what kind of regularity. Unfortunately, many men seem a bit clueless when it comes to *how well* one should clean... er... whatever needs cleaning.Now, don't get defensive, it's not like I think you're too lazy to wash yourselves properly. Consider this a public service message, if you will -- for the few who may need it.

And before you go there -- yes, I realize there are loads of skanky women out there. But I'm not sleeping with them, so I'm not talking them. Today, anyway. I suppose I might get round to it one of these days. These 5 tips don't include the obvious, such as showering, shaving, etc. Those you ought to know well enough, big things that they are. But the llttle things can matter too.

Please brush and floss your teeth.

Yes, any Tom, Dick or Harry will brush his teeth before meeting up with his date. Only *some* of these men, however, will actually floss. it's fairly common, among men and women. Not flossing, I mean. And it's nasty. When you're on a date, your body is going into body-language overdrive. You will be smiling and acting the fool in an attempt to impress your date and make her think you're kiss-worthy. You're going to be getting up close and personal in your plight to do so. Do you really think she's going to want to suck face if she sees an yellow gick stuck between your teeth? If nothing else, at least floss the teeth that will be visible when you smile.

Please clean your ears.

I mean this one, I really do. I have, at least 3 times in my life, been on dates which resulted in my getting a look at earwax I just didn't need to see. If she gives you a back massage, if she reaches over to tousle your hair, if she's tall enough to see your ear canal when standing next to you -- there's a chance she'll look. Inadvertently, obviously, but that will still have a lasting effect, believe me.

Please trim your fingernails and clean underneath them.

Men with long nails are not sexy. It's very creepy to see a bloke wandering round with nails that look like they've been growing since Moses was wandering round in the desert. They don't have to be cut so short it causes you pain, but they shouldn't extend beyond the tip of your finger. And please, for God's sake, clean under your nails; sometimes a 10 minute shower isn't enough to get the crud out, if you've been working in the yard, or summat.

Please exfoliate your face.

Ok, let me explain this one. I am not telling you to get a facial scrub, or anything else. I'm just telling you to scrub your face (not too hard, mind) with a washcloth while you're in the shower. This is because loads of men have no clue that they have crusty skin around their eyebrows or their nose or the corners of their mouths. It's not sexy, take the 2 minutes to scrub your face and it won't be an issue.

Please check your nose.

Is anything worse than having to stare at snot hanging out of someone's nose while you're eating? Most of us learn this lesson when we're kids, but some men never seem to catch on to that little trick where you check your nose before you leave the house or get out of the car. Check!


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