Relationships and Psychic Readings: Answers to Two Common Love Life Questions

Updated on March 18, 2013

“When will I get married (or meet my lifepartner or soul mate)?”

Many young adults ask us this question. Though we can determine through our readings and analyses when someone is likely to experience a compatible love connection, we always recommend to those not yet in their 30s to avoid spending too much energy looking for a serious relationship or marriage partner.

Many of them would be much better off going with the flow, dating, having fun, enjoying their youth, learning who they are beyond the social programming, and focusing on their careers so they have a life before they try to make a relationship "permanent” through a legally-binding agreement.

It would be nice if you met a compatible “life partner” early in life and remained happily together for the “rest of your life.” Unfortunately, most people’s soul schedule or personal fate doesn’t always include what they want, when they’d like to experience it, contrary to popular New Age opinion, no matter how much they “master the art of manifestation.”

Also, the concepts of lock-it-in-forever-happy-marriage and life partners are human, artificial constructs, not spiritually-based; our belief is that on a soul level they are viewed as unrealistic, and life-long relationships aren’t perceived as mandatory or even necessary in many cases when a soul is planning the next incarnation.

If you think about it, in most cases, a fulfilling, satisfying relationship with the same partner from your 20s until you die of old age is unrealistic since everyone changes (for better or worse) at different rates. Yes, some couples do “grow old together” if it’s destined to work out that way, but if it’s not, people don’t have to suffer for the rest of their lives. It’s not the 1800s any more, thankfully. People don’t need to rely entirely on a spouse to survive anymore. You now have the option of being independent and being with a partner because you want to, not just because you’re settling in order to survive.

As far as the notion of a “twin flame” soul mate goes, we’ve found through our long-term, empirical research that it’s as mythical as Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny; it’s an illusionary and subjective concept. Although some soul mates are better than others, after all the illusions fade away, there is no perfect match. Distorted, romantic idealism can be an innocuous escape, but too often it leads people astray, detracting from their earthly purposes and making life more complicated.

Instead of viewing marriage as an important destination and wondering when you’ll be swept off your feet, a better question to ask would be when are you most likely to meet someone who is compatible, or experience one of your more compatible relationships.

In addition to accepting the truth that not all relationships are meant to last a lifetime, we also recommend accepting that everyone has many soul mates. These two suggestions alone will save you much heartache and stress.

We’ve found that all relationships have destined starting and ending times (emotionally and romantically), and most are not meant to last “forever,” even if a couple chooses to stay together, essentially as roommates for whom the flame has long since extinguished, if it even existed at all. If you look at the big picture, a life-long relationship may seem ideal, and it may be part of some people’s path, but from a spiritual perspective, it isn’t as important as you may think.

If you would like to meet a compatible soul mate, make the most of yourself and have faith that you will meet the right people at the right time.

Letting go of any resentment or regret from past relationships and accepting your status of being single will clear the way for a more compatible person, and remaining open to new possibilities instead of thinking in “all (‘The One,’ ‘Forever’) or nothing” terms will lead to more success in your love life. If you’re already involved with someone, letting go of expectations (that may or may not be related to the “twin flame” or other soul mate myths, or “acceptable” social standards) and accepting the person and situation as they are will lead to more harmony.

“Does he/she like me?” “Is he/she thinking about me?”

We can understand if you don’t want to make the first move out of fear of being embarrassed or rejected. But it’s really not your right to know what someone is thinking unless they tell or show you.

Meditate and ask for signs about whether or not it’s a good idea for you to make it clear you are interested or to contact the person. You have nothing to lose, unless you work together. In that case, it’s usually best to remain friends due to the possibility of the relationship issues causing problems at work.