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Save My Marriage-Honeymoon Is Over

Updated on August 10, 2010

Save My Marriage-Over And Over

I was lucky enough this past week to celebrate my 22nd wedding anniversary.  I have been married for 22 years and have been with her for about 24 years.

Everyday I count my blessings and thank God for allowing me to be with someone so special and beautiful everyday.

I, however got to thinking about all the people that I know that got married and never made it as far as us.  I started thinking about what makes us different from all these other people.  The world is a crazy place and it takes a concerned effort to make things work in the relationship department.

I think far too many people have no clue what it takes to survive in marriage.  I also believe that most aren't willing to put in the time and effort that is needed.  Below I will try and focus on the dos and don'ts of marriage.  At least this is according to me.

Save My Marriage-The Honeymoon Is Over

A very common time that a marriage fails is 6 months in.

We have people all the time asking to save my marriage because they had no clue what was coming after the honeymoon.

Oh sure all was peaches and cream.  First the two of you met, then you courted and dated.  of course you fell in love and got engaged.  In your eyes this was going to be the best relationship to ever exist.

The day of the wedding came along and you could never imagine yourself not being with the partner of your dreams.  After the wedding came the honeymoon phase.  Now I don't just mean a two week trip to the Barbados but I actually mean six months to a year after the wedding.

The world couldn't be a better place until you start realizing the world and the marriage isn't just a big honeymoon.  Things are starting to feel a little different.  Deep down you are saying please save my marriage.

Save My Marriage-What We Were Not Told

I wake up from my nightmare screaming save my marriage over and over.  However it doesnt look like good things are going to happen.

So what the heck are these things in the mail called bills?  What about us having to get up at 530 every morning to head out to work.  How about being to tired to do anything after work.

What do you mean we have to buy groceries and cook?  Have all the restaurants closed down?

I have to do laundry!  I cant continue going to my favorite store and buying new things.

I have no clue how to budget and really I dont want to learn.  All of these things and many more will give indication that the honeymoon phase is over and reality is starting to settle in.

Life really isnt taught anywhere in society but if there were a place I would say this is pretty important

Save My Marriage-What Are These Things Crawling Around?

In the quest to save my marriage I had to be introduced to kids.  I think they are called babies when they first get here.  Someone really has to inform people how the disease of having kids is stopped.  Especially those who don't have a clue.

I had no clue what we were going to do.  Oh sure it seemed so romantic at first.  We were going to start our very own family.  We were going to have children to carry on our legacy.

Well there was nothing about having kids that could ever appeal to anyone.  First of all the women gains about 5000 pounds, cant stop eating and is on a continuous grump.  I wanted to say something other than grump but thought I may get the Hub banned.  She is always crying and no matter what you do there is no making her happy.

Then when the baby is born.  Oh my God, I'm not even sure where to start on that subject.  First of all it turns out to be non stop crying.  Then you are always either feeding, burping, changing or carrying the baby.

The things that come out of a baby's mouth and butt could never be duplicated in a science lab.  Of course a baby is happy when they are sleeping which they do about 15 seconds in a day. 

Diapers, formula, medicines and so much more.  In all honesty a baby is a little bank machine that just keeps on taking until they are about 25 if you are lucky.  Some even keep taking after that.

No one ever taught us how to change stinky crappy mustard yellow diapers, no one taught us about puking all over us, no one ever taught us about croup, teething. playing shy, walking and so on and so on. 

No wonder all you hear is please help me save my marriage.

Save My Marriage 101

All m all I have a solution that would greatly lessen the amount of people screaming help me save my marriage.

It really is quite simple.  I really don't know why anyone hasn't thought of this before.  Save my marriage 101.

That's right, education could and would make a ton of difference.  I think life in general should be an option in high school.  Hell I even think we could dump anything else and replace it with life 101.  After all i would rather see a person be a better life person than know how to conjugate a verb.

Okay, okay, I know all of you are going to be yelling and screaming about how important math, science, social and English are.  In all honesty I totally agree.  The thing is I also think the subject of life is very important as well.

Have you ever noticed what happens after graduation.  For the most part our students graduate.  They plan for this for 12 years, have a big party and then the next day they are all on their own to face the big old world.  They really get no preparation.

Now I am not saying the other subjects in school are not important.  That was just me being silly.  What I am saying is that if we taught more stuff on life lessons I believe we would hear save my marriage a lot less.


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    • profile image


      7 years ago

      congrats on your anniversary. Its good to hear such stories especially in this world we live in that make divorce and seperation the in thing. I think should be a school that teaches about what to expect in marriage so that you know before hand what you are getting into and you can decide right from the start if you want to stay or go.

    • Dale Mazurek profile imageAUTHOR

      Dale Mazurek 

      8 years ago from Canada

      I think a test would be great but only after some sort of extended course.

      Everyone has rocky parts in a relationship. Its how you deal with those that determine how good the relationship is


    • Don Simkovich profile image

      Don Simkovich 

      8 years ago from Pasadena, CA

      My wife and I went through personality testing and at least six weeks of an engagement class at church. After 22 yrs and raising an adopted family of four kids, and taking guardianship of our granddaughter for over a year, we have hit some deep rocky parts. We just went through a deep test recently and will probably have some as we adjust to life without kids. It takes continual communication and a continual appreciation of each other . . . a deep appreciation of each other. Glad you wrote the Hub!

    • rmcrayne profile image


      8 years ago from San Antonio Texas

      Maybe not just a marriage license requirement, but a test as well!

    • Dale Mazurek profile imageAUTHOR

      Dale Mazurek 

      8 years ago from Canada

      You are so right lorlie. My wife is my best friend in the whole world and I wouldnt trade her for anything.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 

      8 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Happy 22nd! My hubby and I just celebrated our 22nd in January. I think the trick is to be FRIENDS before you do that crazy thing called 'getting married.'

      Thanks for the giggles!

    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 

      8 years ago from south Florida

      Congratulations, Dale, on your 22nd anniversary. Now you've got it made. It's only the first 22 years that are the hard ones. lol

    • Dale Mazurek profile imageAUTHOR

      Dale Mazurek 

      8 years ago from Canada

      You guys are probably right but I cant help but think that with some education our divorce rate, child abuse, domestic abuse numbers would all be down. We probably wouldnt have as many marriages as well. Either way thanks for stopping by and thanks for commenting.


    • Hello, hello, profile image

      Hello, hello, 

      8 years ago from London, UK

      Paradise is right there. Nobody prepares for life. All the other subjects yes. Great hub.

    • Paradise7 profile image


      8 years ago from Upstate New York

      Good hub. Oh, my, are we not prepared for what happens after high school and college. There really isn't anything in the academic world to prepare a person for life's ups and downs. But we muddle through somehow. We each find our own paths through the maze. I think winging it builds character!


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