ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Depression Covers a Variety of States, But Can Be Treated. But, You Have to Ask....

Updated on January 8, 2020
Christofers Flow profile image

Christofer spent 10 years in family counseling. Later, he obtained a Psy. D.. His passions are Health, Philosophy, History & Astrology.

Depression Does Not Fix Itself as a Facial Expression. It has its Mysteries.

What Lies Behind a Smile?
What Lies Behind a Smile?

The "Black Dog" of Depression and Other Assorted Canine Qualities

The "black dog" of depression is a coined phrase. It can be thought of as something that "comes over" a person from time to time.

One can give it that kind of name or, so can unfortunately a loved one. Having married well, great kids, carved his way to a nice career, plowing up through tons of good will, carting his "black dog" with him as he went. He considered it to be a part of his bearing, his "Gravitas". It made him imposing, even though he was just more of a sullen, sloop-shouldered grave person.

Those friends who said he had wonderful good fortune were really silently commenting on his untreated gray ambient way. They were really saying: "Wow, he does so well, and has so many good things happen to him, even though he's a schmuck!" People had sympathy for him. He would sit at parties staring holes into walls, and sipping on drinks, as he did his best to ignore laughter and mirth.

Then after a decade or so, his wife just collapsed and declared she had had enough. He was actually surprised. But no one else was. His self sabotage had finally done him in. It was set on a clock. The clock was ticking inside his wife's noble heart and vigorously powerful demeanor. Her friends understood. They said, 'Well, I was wondering how long she could take an untreated dark specter lying next to her every night." This man blocked his wife's attempts "to get him counseling".

You might ask why people did not have more sympathy. That is an easy question. He would not address his problem, as a problem. He could not see the angel of death cast that he had to his face. It got worse and worse. "Viral programming" tends to creep and gain ground on the victim. Just like a virus, it takes up residence in the nooks and crannies of the unobserved wrinkles of the tortured soul. But it's not really that spooky; if we would not IGNORE TREATMENT.

His real problem was his arrogance and his pride. That was so monumental that his "Achilles Heel" was his depression, but his pride put him out there on the field of battle where he should not have been.

Amazingly, he let the divorce happen without making attempts at reconciliation. It was his view that his wife did not understand him. His wife silently agreed to his assessment that: "they were so different." And he was so superior, as he told himself in divorce court. His wife found out he had been unfaithful. She just shook her head and said. "Take him. Take him."

Raw Sharp Anger Right Across the Face of Her Loved Ones

Her conversation was pleasant, except when she let that anger go. She had relative charm and a kindness that was present enough for her to have friends. People thought she was bi-polar, but she did not have the self awareness to investigate that possibility. For every friend she would make, she would quietly lose one on the back side. She moved through streams of human contacts, interacting and honestly needing friends.

She would suddenly jump into mini-rages and get what people called "a funny look" in her eyes. She brought way too much to her conflicts. She weighed down her "boxing gloves" with a column of quarters. That was an image she would coldly say to herself. She was protected by relatives at her small business setting. Treatment that she was ignoring would have given her blessings, but she would not'

She was not a tragedy as much as an mildly infected sufferer of angst, anxiety, sarcasm and vexing silly challenges. Annoying and often vicious. A friend joked: "She got way too much attention when she was young. Her parents loved the hell out of her and spoiled her."

The viral nature of her curse was that she just could not build up any lasting good will. Several sought help for her, but she would politely evade. Her infection was like an "over look able" birthmark. An absolutely beautiful woman with a permanent blemish. Her kids, surprisingly developed sweet charm; almost as an antidote to their spasmodically unpredictable mother.

The husband had learned long ago not to "engage her", and was not surprised when they were often not invited out as a couple. His bridge night gave him a respite and a private joy of companionship that nourished him. He consciously became a golfer. He would say: "18 holes in the open air, and I get some exercise." --- When she would ask him why he had taken up the sport with serious conviction.

Stealing Away Our Brains

To reach for a state of elevation, we can conclude that certain behaviors seem to be natural, even though there is a self destructive element. Certainly greater consciousness can improve us and self destruction can be removed.

Continuing Inebriation - (the plight of the alcoholic/depressive who somehow survives) is probably the best and oldest example of self sabotage.

Shakespeare had Othello say: "Oh God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains..." Self Sabotage of all types has this strange similitude. Whether alcohol is actually involved or not, there seems to be a human quality of acting as if "our brains were stolen away". The virus, that phenomenal part of nature that has no inherent life of itself, acts against us and yet it seeks to live in us to perpetuate itself. Sounds like some habits that we have. In the end, though, we must summon up a real effort! Something like a first goal!

The first goal is to say: "This is a problem inside, but. not me, myself! I do need help though. I should have an "initial conversation". Yes, a talk with a pro."




Churchill and Lincoln famously suffered from Depression

Many artists and Performers, along with with those in an array of careers have suffered with mild and severe states. Look at a Macmillan Dictionary's Thesaurus view of many similar states:

To be, or to become sad, regretful or upset

Feeling sad or unhappy

Feeling disappointed

To make someone feel sad or upset

Feeling sorry

Not sorry

Ways of saying you are sorry or regret something

To say or show that you are sorry

To express sadness

To make someone feel disappointed

Shakespeare Had Some Words

Shakespeare had Othello say: "Oh God, that men should put an enemy in their mouths to steal away their brains..." Self Sabotage of all types has this strange similitude.

PTSD

Formal Career Soldiers Often Suffer (PTSD)
Formal Career Soldiers Often Suffer (PTSD)

© 2010 Christofer French

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • thevoice profile image

      thevoice 

      9 years ago from carthage ill

      terrific Articles read great hub work thanks

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://maven.io/company/pages/privacy

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)