Selfishness in a Marriage

Selfishness is present in many marriages.

Do you have a selfish partner, or are you that selfish partner?

Married life is challenging as most couples go through day-to-day issues. Selfishness is one of the major aspects of any couple's life, and it shows when one partner behaves in that manner.

There is love between couples, but selfishness drives married couples apart if not overlooked by each partner. It is a weak part of marriage being selfish towards your married partner allows for mixed emotions.

Selfishness draws that wedge between a couple and the marriage fails quickly if the couple doesn't work through the problem.

Partners become angry with one another, and certain behaviours can become addictive.

The marriage doesn't involve happiness anymore when selfishness gaps in that marriage. What was supposed to be a gift to a married couple becomes a nightmare or a toxic marriage for both partners.

A happy and romantic relationship doesn't last long when selfishness exceeds the limit.

The short-lived happy and romantic marriage falls apart because of the over-controlled behaviours of one of the significant partners, from both partners.

It is not always the fault of one partner and there are no perfect couples.

What is your view on selfishness in a marriage?

Culture has a lot to do with selfishness in a marriage. I observed many couples in the small community I live in and see that most couples are faced with this odd behaviour of selfishness.

The man makes sure his wife has her day job and the problem with that he also wants her salary. She works harder than he does, and her salary gets taken away from her.

Most women don't have the right to claim their salaries for themselves. Their husbands take control of that. This leaves them without the earnings they had worked so hard for in a month.

Is this selfish or what would you call that?

• It is often about his family and his way.
• She has her day planned by him.
• This happens in many marriages.
• She does what he wants her to do and can't do any different than what he says.

Her voice is not heard!

• Traditionally, this is how most married couples have been living for centuries.
• It causes conflict in a marriage and this is not a problem that gets fixed.
• The problem is not seen by any member of the family.
• The wife becomes unhappy and just stays in the marriage to show others, she is a good wife.
• Selfish behaviour tears down a marriage slowly and painfully.
• The married couple becomes one and has nothing much to do in her life except to be a good mother and wife to her family.
• Everything is about the family and in the process of their marriage, the woman's life remains in the dark.
• Understanding your marriage is important.
• Selfishness affects marriages without you even knowing it.

Have you recognized selfishness in your marriage?

The partner with a weak personality has selfish behaviour.

Is your partner insensitive to loved ones?

Do they become angry if something planned doesn't go their way?

Does your partner, manipulate you?

Did you notice your partner using others to get what they want?

Are you treated as an object?

Does your partner lack empathy?

Is your partner constantly criticizing others?

Is your partner ignoring your needs?

How important are you to your partner?

Does your partner fail to please you in any way?

Is your partner financially supportive?

Does your partner only look for their needs and wants?

Is your partner playful to avoid responsibilities?

Is your partner always blaming someone else for their faults?

When your partner shows a lack of financial responsibility, it is also a part of selfishness in a marriage.

What causes selfishness in a marriage?

The lack of education allows for the individual to feel this way.

So, you are the selfish spouse, what do you do?

A selfish spouse can control their behaviours.

Avoid acting out angrily if you don't have it your way.

Selfishness in a marriage can hinder your true being.

One of you can use this behaviour to hurt the other.

Don't get carried away with your angry emotions.

Selfishness means when one partner only sees for themselves and ignores the other.

People are affected by selfishness before marriage and after marriage.

A single person has only themselves to think of but when married there are two people to think of.

Everything you do concerns two people.

How you spend your money, and how you make a plan concerns two people.

Marriage is a commitment only if you want to be with your significant other openly and truly. Sometimes you make choices, but don't think carefully about how it will affect your partner.

It is easy to fail to see your faults in such behaviours. What you have is taken for granted and that is one of the reasons why many marriages fail.

In some marriages, both partners are selfish, but when they have overstepped the boundary of selfishness that becomes a problem. Of course, people are selfish in many relationships or families, but there is that limit of selfishness that makes relationships suffer the most.

Selfishness becomes an issue when you hold on to that behaviour to have made it into a problem.

Fear makes you feel selfish.

The weaker and less confident shows selfishness toward others. Look at what you want and what you need for yourself and try to make your partner part of that choice.

Selfishness destroys the best of relationships. Being difficult in a marriage is being part of a selfish partner.

You must realize, after marriage, you become one and whatever you do in your marriage affects both people.

Selfishness in marriage can lead to unhealthy relationships. Poor communication and caring towards partners. Unhappy moments develop in marriages.

Overall, the family becomes unstable.

In failure to listen to your partner's needs, such behaviours take control and conversations dominate the marriage.

You will find that you spend less time with your partner and seek other friendships.

Your selfish behaviour doesn't fix the problem instead worsens it. People who are affected by such selfish behaviours have poor parenting skills.

Since everything starts at home and once you are out that door, you carry yourself around in that manner.

The personal traits of parents are carried with you. Don't feel bad for being selfish just try to improve as you go along.

A sacrifice made between couples from the selfish trait picked up from their parents.

Where do you think you get your selfish trait from?

Unlimited selfishness is brought into a marriage without you knowing how that happened to you.

Selfishness is a serious conflict and shouldn't be ignored by partners.

Once you have identified selfishness in your marriage forgive each other and move on from that terrible experience.

Support your marriage and discover new experiences to make a good start over in your marriage.

Couples are not often open to admitting their selfish behaviour.

They try to avoid being honest.

How to recover from selfish behaviours?

• You can overcome such behaviours by controlling the excessive need to dominate in the marriage.
• It is not easy to give up control in a marriage.
• Communication is key to getting better at your marriage.
• Be generous, and responsible for your actions.
• Cool off a bit, and avoid the temperamental behaviour.

Be courteous.

• Show your kind heart to your partner, the kindness you showed each other when you first met.
• Love one another truly.
• Understand your partner's needs and wants.
• Be open-minded and share your needs.

What makes a good marriage?

In a marriage, there are many aspects to be understood, to be learned, and to be taken to heart.

Most marriages are taken for granted and are not appreciated by one another.