ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Should You Reconnect With Lost Loves

Updated on October 31, 2018
DDE profile image

Devika enjoys sharing her work with a friendly community. Writing is a big part of her life. Online work has improved her lifestyle.

Would you go to great lengths to rekindle lost loves?

Most couples reunite years later after divorced or widowed and take off from where they left. They find each again and don't have to think about the ''what ifs'' After many years of thinking about ''what if'' they finally get together, and rekindle lost love.

· An example of rekindling lost love:

A guy in his twenties dated many times and each time he found someone they managed to form a relationship. After a year they would break up. It was his or her fault.

During this time he met a woman and fell in love with her they were inseparable until their romantic relationship took a bad turn. They had to separate and did not see each other again.

He formed a relationship with someone he met at a nightclub they were good together but one problem was on his mind. He could not move on freely without thinking of ''what if.''

An Example:

The relationship with his new partner was fine. They married and had two kids and tried to make their marriage work. The background of each partner being so unstable in relationships they both wanted their relationship to work out.

A few years into their marriage he caught his wife in the act cheating on him.
Things unraveled itself in this marriage. He wanted to be with his wife but was not as happy as he would have been with his lost love.

He divorced his wife and remained single for a while. Life for him was more exciting in his previous relationship with his lost love. The ex-girlfriend (lost love) had also, been divorced.

They met one day while in the local store and it was a great moment for both. After a brief conversation they exchanged telephone numbers and from then on they were connected.

Both partners have kids from previous marriages and are all fine with that part of their relationship. Their love for each other was more meaningful and would last a lifetime.

He did not give up on love but gave up on a less meaningful relationship. Love has no boundaries and no time. Love can happen at any time or place. The lost love rekindled with more emotions and fewer differences.

They had to get to know each other all over again but that did not matter their lifetime together. When people get older their second chances grow even more.

The results are more satisfying and their lives become richer and warmer. The memories don’t just disappear it is what holds the actual past of any individual. Sometimes you feel the need to make peace while aging.

Though can be a possibility for many couples. When you and your lost love are married to other partners it does make a difference and the relationship can be kept on a platonic level if you let it.

Modern technology has made many lives easy to find their long lost loves. If you choose to go in that direction watch out for those old feelings coming back to you, it could be a problem on your hands.

A simple email to a lost love can ruin a good marriage and that is exactly what is happening in this modern day. One can become obsessive about their lost love and try to stay in contact with the other person. Once the contact is made issues can start all over with the good marriage.

Think about what you have that should be an important part of your life and not the past. Your choice has been made and you can't undo it. If you have something good keep it.

Many good marriages crumble because of lost loves. Addictions such as drinking, drugs, gambling or some of other riskier behaviors. They tend to perform this way even after marriage.

The thought of getting back together with a lost love comes to mind and that can make them fall into their old habits. An emotional affair can take place very quickly if you lose control of your feelings.

For example:

If you had a vivid dream of your lost love you get up and think about that person and would want to take action. You want to make something happen because your dream has clouded your mind.

You can't blame your dreams for your wrong actions. Sometimes lost loves are just curious and want to know more about the ''what ifs.''

Good old feelings won't die out and you can't close off those feelings. Two people who were committed to each other this can be from a romantic relationship to a marriage. It is bound to come up in conversations. The person can't get rid of their old flames.

You have to be educated to understand these feelings of a lost a love. It is easy to misunderstand the whole aspect and turn frustrated and become unhappy. It can be easily misunderstood when contacted by the lost love. Be clear from the start and don't take anything seriously. Be innocent and be straight about the contact.

Love Lost


Your current partner must know from the start there would be no complications or secrets to hide.

A lost love relationship is rarely successful.

Face up to reality. You are no longer that vulnerable teenager. Going back and make it right again is not an option.

· Do you think a lost love brings benefits to a current relationship?

Unfortunately, it brings no benefits to the current relationship. Here the person is not focused on the current relationship instead of trying to bring back the past. An individual recently made the mistake of re-connecting with someone they had dated over thirty years ago.

At that time of contacting the lost love, the person was in a vulnerable state. A happily married person for thirty years and is a successful individual. It was a stupid choice to make and to rekindle with a lost love is ridiculous unless both are not committed to other relationships.

Don't go there it would ruin all you have worked for most of your life. People make mistakes and sometimes it is good to think about what you are going to do logically before even getting into it.

· An example:

A man divorced his wife over twenty years ago and refuses to stay Friends with her. They have two children who are now in their forties.

· Do you think this man should be friends with his ex-wife?

· Would there be old sparks if they just stayed friends?

· Does a part of this man still love her even though he is happily remarried?

It is a betrayal of other partners if one chooses to contact their lost love.

Would you like the chance to relive your adolescent life with your lost love?

They are grown into adults with different lives and needs. A simple and pure love might be it is your choice how you want to live the rest of your life. Her husband has been in contact with his lost love for years via email and Facebook. She has been married twice and now the husband wants to introduce his wife to his lost love.

Do you think the wife should be concerned, about the idea of meeting the lost love?

The wife has no desire to meet her. The husband defends his lost love and says he has no intentions.

Rekindle Lost Loves if you are Single

Lost loves


Rekindle Lost Loves

Would you like the chance to relive your adolescent life with your lost love?

See results

© 2014 Devika Primić


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi Shyron thank you for all votes you kindness is highly appreciated thank you verymuch.

    • Shyron E Shenko profile image

      Shyron E Shenko 

      5 years ago from Texas

      Devika, I don't believe it would work out, there had to be a reason it did not work in the first place.

      Very interesting, voted up, UAI, and shared

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      ubanichijioke you a so right and every individual has a different opinion on this one some would like to be friends glad you feel the opposite it does not always go well. Thank you for commenting.

    • ubanichijioke profile image

      Alexander Thandi Ubani 

      5 years ago from Lagos

      Lost love? No way! No need of rekindling such feelings when you are happily married. When a man/woman is married, it is better to let go of the past no matter how sweet. No friendship, No contacts! LOL.

      well, that's for me.

      good write.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      billys1 ''I do not see the harm of being friends with a person that is a part of our past life.'' is right on neither do I. Thank you for sharing your comment here I appreciate your time and effort. Have a nice day.

    • profile image


      5 years ago from "Somewhere", USA

      I answered "To happily married to think about it" to the poll above but if the opportunity ever did present itself, and the other person would keep things on a platonic basis then I would see no harm in being friends with a former love that was in my life. I know myself well enough to know that I, at least, could and would keep it on a strictly platonic level. In our marriage there are two people, of course, and both of us have had and do have lives outside of our home. I totally trust my wife and she totally trusts me. We both are to happily married to ruin our relationship by overstepping the bounds that we have set up for ourselves. A"Former Love" is just that, former of our past lives, not in our present one. So, with that said and within that situation I do not see the harm of being friends with a person that is a part of our past life. Plus I would make sure that my wife knew about the old friend that I was being friends with and include her in any meetings with the other person, if my wife wanted to be there. and vice versa.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Thank you Cherylann it would be different once you have become an adult.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi starstream so true about people changing that is so often the issue and letting go is hard thank you

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Cris Sp thank you kindly for commenting on my hubs.

    • Cherylann Mollan profile image

      Cherylann Mollan 

      5 years ago from India

      Hi DDE! Very interesting article. I think it's a matter of time. When you're just out of a relationship with someone, and your heart is still raw from all the loving, hurting and loosing, at this time, I think I would buy into the lost love meeting again suggestion. But, somehow time passes by, you meet new people, you form a new relationship, a new habit, a new comfort level, you change somehow. Now, If you had to meet the lost love, I think things would be different, simply because you would be different. But, it's a nice thought anyway. :)

    • starstream profile image

      Dreamer at heart 

      5 years ago from Northern California

      This is a great subject to discuss here. Thanks for sharing it with us. The thing is people grow and change. Time cannot stand still to pick up where you left off long ago. There may be a few exceptions.

    • CrisSp profile image


      5 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      More like a recipe for disaster as Bill said. Similar to the story of "love in the time if cholera", which is great but success rate of going back to your past is quite questionable.

      Interesting, well written article.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi Susan thank you for sharing your thoughts here

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      ChristyWrites you are so right ''it may not be reality if those two people do meet again,'' thank you

    • Susan Recipes profile image


      5 years ago from India

      Interesting topic and very well written. I don`t have any lost lover whom I can reconnect but I would never go back to my past.

    • ChristyWrites profile image

      Christy Birmingham 

      5 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      It certainly is an interesting topic, DDE. I think that many people develop an idea of what it would be like to be with the lost love - but it may not be reality if those two people do meet again. Well written and good points here!

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Well said grand old lady you know exactly what i mean as others do in their added comments thank you

    • grand old lady profile image

      Mona Sabalones Gonzalez 

      5 years ago from Philippines

      Better to find someone new than go back to an old love.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      rasta 1 thank you

    • rasta1 profile image

      Marvin Parke 

      5 years ago from Jamaica

      Lost loves are fantasies but I have seen it happen before. I wish it could happen to me but a very long shot.

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      FlourishAnyway well mentioned thank you

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      kidscrafts thank you for the continuous support enjoy the rest of the weekend

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Ericdierker, thank you for commenting

    • DDE profile imageAUTHOR

      Devika Primić 

      5 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      billybuc ''besides, they are lost for a very good reason. :)'' dead right thank you

    • FlourishAnyway profile image


      5 years ago from USA

      They didn't work out the first time for a reason. Beware, beware unless both are single.

    • Suzanne Day profile image

      Suzanne Day 

      5 years ago from Melbourne, Victoria, Australia

      It would be unusual for the adults to reconnect as lost loves as they ARE different people with different lives. Having said that, we've all met people who are "soul mates" with us from the minute we meet them - if such a soul mate were lost to me and came back, I would certainly be pleased to have them back in my life. Voted awesome!

    • kidscrafts profile image


      5 years ago from Ottawa, Canada

      I don't have "lost loves" and I am quite happy about that :-))))

      Have a great weekend!

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 

      5 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      I think I get it. Been there a few times and it worked out just great. I am sure glad that right now my wife of over ten years keeps me way too busy to even think of such stuff.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      5 years ago from Olympia, WA

      That's a recipe for disaster and I think I'll pass on the chance. Much too happy with Bev to mess around with "lost loves"....besides, they are lost for a very good reason. :)


    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

    Show Details
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)