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Relationships - I Need Some Space?

Updated on October 20, 2010

Relationship Counseling: The Truth Behind The Excuses

I put this question on the hub pages forum and got the same answer 75% of the time. "The relationship is over". I agree totally. I had a friend ask me that and I kind of looked at her in disbelief that she did not see the big picture. I felt for her because the weepy look on her face let me know she pretty much knew what it meant. I guess she just needed me to tell her straight up and hurt her all over again or she just wanted a little female bonding comfort. Whatever the case, I did not hesitate to let her know that this famous phrase usually is the obvious end to the current situation.

A lot of men (and women) seem to use this line as a way to get you to see the bigger picture without actually having to say it cold and upfront to your face. In the end someone always ends up getting hurt or feeling like they were obviously too pushy etc. So what is the more respectable way to face the facts that it's just not working out? Being honest seems to be the best thing that you can do instead of lame excuses like "I need some space".

Sometimes if you tell your partner what the real issue is and give them a chance to change it then maybe the union can be saved, but often in certain situations it's just not that simple. Some people get out of a current relationship to pursue another and just make up a BS reason to drop the current partner. As if that's not low down enough, sometimes the case may be that they were never into you in the first place and the lust did not last.

People often confuse sex, lust and infatuation with love and the other party may play on this for a while until they decide that they are tired of you and then hope you eventually will get the picture. Very often someone will just walk away without a good bye or reason but that is usually just a sign of cowardliness on their part. Most of the time when people react this way it is to prevent themselves from having to face the harsh reality of hurting someone who may really have loved them or cared for them strongly in some form. In other instances someone may really feel bad about hurting the other party and just can not bring themselves to hurt them like that because they really just need some space.

Relationship Advice

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(4) Ways To Get Over A Painful Breakup

  • 1. Pamper Yourself ~ Kick back and take a little me time at the spa or with one of your best friends who will make you laugh.
  • 2. Read ~ You may be laughing at this one but reading those gossip magazines and interesting articles can help refresh your mind and let you see things could be worst.
  • 3. Go Out ~ Go to a concert with friends or plan a girls night out to a club or bowling etc.
  • 4. Join A Club or Group ~ Take up a new or existing hobby to take your mind off the pain.


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    • stacies29 profile image

      stacies29 8 years ago from Washington DC

      Very true. Just in this circumstances it did but sometimes it can really be that they just need the space whether you are married or just dating. Thanks for the insight Nellie. You made a good point.

    • profile image

      Nelle Hoxie 8 years ago

      I think if that's the reason given for leaving a relationship, it wasn't much of a relationship to begin with. I do have a husband that does need a lot of space and time to think. And room to have adventures. But I've learned to deal with it. By the way space does not mean other women.