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Stolen Moments - The Anatomy of a Love Affair

Updated on November 25, 2009
Cherish the little moments.
Cherish the little moments.

Every night I would lie awake in bed, my eyes fluttering with anticipation as I thought of the words I wanted to say to her. It wasn’t just the way she looked at me that made my entire body tremble. My emotions for her were so strong that whenever we had a conversation my mind would travel to a place where only dreams could reside. I wanted to embrace her with my words, and kiss her with my thoughts. Like a dying man’s final plea, I wanted to open up to her…

Regret

I told myself this could be my only chance to tell her how I felt. If she walked away and we never uttered another word to one another, I would have comfort in knowing that “what if” would be the only two words left unsaid. Standing there in front of her, I felt like I was on stage about to give a performance that I had spent my whole life preparing for, but unsure of how the audience would respond. In my heart, I knew her purpose wasn’t to be the love of my life, but that maybe she would open my eyes to what love could be…

Realization

Somewhere lost in a moment, stored away in time, lies the story of an awakening. An abrupt realization that not all love stories consists of two people falling in love. For love is so complicated, it would be dismissive to subject it to such an obtuse point of view. However, to love and not be loved, there truly is no worse feeling in the world. And even though time has a way of easing the pain, the wound remains forever. And I remember distinctly how the loss of a past love had me floating along like a leaf in the wind, in search of a place to fall…

Reflection

I sat there in my car, in the same spot that hours before had occupied us both. Closing my eyes I could sense her presence next to me. Love is beyond physical; it’s beyond mental; more than unconditional positive regard. It’s a man sitting alone in his car, in the middle of the night, in an empty parking lot, wishing that life had a rewind and pause button.

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    • profile image

      sharonjoe 4 years ago

      Hello Himitsu !

      Love is such a powerful emotion, the waves engulfing one's heart totally! I can imagine the baited anticipation and the bittersweet pain at the end, that you wished life has a rewind and pause button! I have been there too... and I so well understand your emotion..!

      Blessings

      Sharonjoe

    • Pamela N Red profile image

      Pamela N Red 7 years ago from Oklahoma

      You are a true artist with words. I enjoyed this missive and felt the passion and longing in your voice.

    • Himitsu Shugisha profile image
      Author

      Himitsu Shugisha 7 years ago

      Aww, thanks Kia. I truly appreciate your kinds words.

    • profile image

      Kia 7 years ago

      You never cease to amaze me...even after all of these years ;-).

    • Himitsu Shugisha profile image
      Author

      Himitsu Shugisha 7 years ago

      Jennifer/Lorlie, thank you so much for your comments. I look forward to your hubs as well.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 7 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      This is beautiful...You've a new fan.

    • Jennifer D. profile image

      Jennifer D. 7 years ago from Canada

      You write so very well. I didn't know that one could use Hubpages as a forum to share such emotion.

      Thank you for the insight. I am a big fan!

    • Himitsu Shugisha profile image
      Author

      Himitsu Shugisha 7 years ago

      Abiscardi, thanks for reading my hub and I appreciate the kind comment.

    • profile image

      abiscardi 7 years ago

      Loved this

    • Hookah profile image

      Hookah 7 years ago from Kentucky

      I was always told, those times which we miss the mark are on purpose, somehow, someday you'll meet once again at a crossroads again. Maybe not with the same feeling but you'll remember all of this with fond memories. Great hub Himitsu very well executed.

    • Himitsu Shugisha profile image
      Author

      Himitsu Shugisha 7 years ago

      No, instead I simply set back and lived in the moment. And yes, it was my only chance.

    • DJ Chinita profile image

      DJ Chinita 7 years ago from San Francisco, CA

      so did u say it to her... was that your only chance...