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The Difference That Exists Between Love And Lust

Updated on October 3, 2012

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The Disparity That exists Between Love And Lust by Roldens Paulynice is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.Based on a work at
The Disparity That exists Between Love And Lust by Roldens Paulynice is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.Based on a work at
Roldens Paulynice,  author of this article...
Roldens Paulynice, author of this article...

By Roldens Paulynice

When we think about love and lust, most people presumably say that the disparity that exists between them is the most discombobulated or confusing one because it requires a lot of careful scrutiny to know it. From my perspective, I think that recognizing this disparity can make them ascertain that it is the most conspicuous one that ever exists. Some people say that they are synonymous, but in reality, they are not because even though they have a lot of common characteristics, there's a lot of discrepancies that exist between them. Love is a profound, a passionate, or a natural affection for someone; it's also care, devotion, and respect, but lust is absolutely the contrary; it's an intense sexual desire.

Let start by discussing that love is a profound, a passionate, or a natural affection for someone, but lust is not. As many people know, profound affection is the most ultimate feeling that shines in people's hearts when they are in love. It can cause them to think and dream consistently about their partners. Some people who are in love often say that closing their eyes is one of the most appealing things that they can do because every time they do it, their partners are the first persons that they see; as result, it's hard for them to stay away from their partners. They often also say that because love is a natural feeling, it comes from Jesus. When they are in love, there's a transformation that effectuates in their souls and in their hearts that they are incapable of describing. They even think that their partners are the most amazing creatures that ever exist. But when people are in lust, the most dominant feeling that exists in their relationships is appeasing their sexual desires. Once they finish appeasing their needs, they don't even think or dream about their partners anymore because they don't really feel a natural, a profound, or a passionate feeling for their partners.

Love is care that someone has for his partner, but lust is not. When someone cares for his partner, he wants to sacrifice himself to satisfy his partner's needs. His partner's problems represent his problems. When his partner lives in an insupportable condition, he's affected mentally and physically. It can make him ponder how to solve the problem in order to remove his partner from it. If he can't find a way to solve the problem, he starts having physical problems, such as becoming skinny or sick. In a simple statement, he always shows his partner his compassion. But someone who's involved in a lusting relationship doesn't care for his partner consistently because he doesn't really feel a strong compassionate feeling for him or her. However, sometimes he may show his partner that he cares for her or him when he wants to appease his sexual need, but once he appeases his sexual desire, the moment of extortion begins. In a simple statement, someone who is in a lusting relationship cares for his partner temporarily, but one who is in a loving relationship cares for his partner unceasingly.

Love is respect, but lust is not. From my perspective, I think that the most crucial or significant characteristic that exists in a relationship is respect. When someone respects his partner, he treats him or her with a special consideration, a high regard, or a high esteem. Those characteristics can assist this relationship to flourish positively and to avoid some negative impacts in it. However, in a lusting relationship, respect doesn't show most of the time; consequently, the miss of respect causes that relationship to flourish negatively. The act of fighting, cheating, and using profanity plays a dominant role in it.

Love is devotion, but lust is not. Majority of educated people describes devotion as a predilection or a penchant that someone has to do something. In a loving relationship, it works the same way. When two people devote themselves to love each other, they do their best to show respect, compassion, tolerance, or a positive attitude toward each other. But as I have being telling you in the preceding paragraph, if a lusting relationship is characterized by fighting, using profanity, and cheating, those are the primary persuasive statements that can convince us to know that people who are in a lusting relationship don't devote themselves to love each other.

Lust is an intense sexual desire, which plays the most dominant role in a lusting relationship. When you are in lust with your partner, you just want to have sex with him or her without thinking about a future; as a result, not thinking about a future is detrimental to the relationship. But in a loving relationship, it's different. Even though sometime sexual desire exists in a loving relationship, it's not detrimental to the relationship because you also think about the future, you show respect, and you show your compassion to your partner. Those characteristics are essential to the relationship. They assist it to develop positively.

I strongly conclude that the disparity that exists between love and lust can assist us to know when we are in love and when we are in lust because most people think that they are in love; but in reality, they are not. It's essential for us to scrutinize our partner in order to know his or her intentions if we don't want to fall in a hot water. A lusting relationship is characterized and dominated by sexual or physical need that is not adequate for a true loving relationship. (Roldens Paulynice's Article).

Roldens Paulynice, author of this research, was born in December 24, 1990 in Gonaives, Haiti. He has published many short stories and essays, especially about relationship or love, literature review, education, and politics. Think before You Act and What Causes Many College Students to Fail or Drop out are two of his works that he likes the most. Fortunately, in February 2009, he had the chance to come to the United States, attended Glade Central High School, and graduated in May 2010 with a 3.08 GPA. In May 8, 2012, he graduated from Palm Beach State College with an Associate in Arts Degree. Right now, he is attending Florida Atlantic University, pursuing his BS in accounting and business administration. In the near future, he wants to become a CPA. Being a writer is something that he has certain zeal to become in his life, but right now, he is trying, hoping to become a famous one day. He is the author of Teenage Marriages Are Likely to End Unhappily, Think before You Act, What Causes Many College Students to Fail or Dropout, Many People Get Married for Foolish Reasons, An Essay about the Tell-Tale-Heart and The Black Cat, and many other works.

"Sometimes, we do some crazy stuffs when we love someone, but that doesn't mean that we are stupid. Love just simply makes us blind, and we are unable to follow what we want. However, our hearts and our souls choose to follow what they want while our bodies are unable to resist or to control this feeling. Sometimes, even though the one that our hearts and our souls want hurts us, we still can't stay away from that person because our hearts don't give us the chance to do that, and our hearts and our souls say yes even though sometimes our mouths say no. The heart is what we need to survive.We are obligated to please it. The soul directs the body to where it wants it .There's nothing we can do."
(Roldens Paulynice's quote.)


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    • LeslieAdrienne profile image

      Leslie A. Shields 

      2 years ago from Georgia

      Beautiful Hub! I am so glad that a young man has this insight... God Bless you and all the best to you.

    • profile image


      3 years ago

      Holy shziint, this is so cool thank you.

    • ladyguitarpicker profile image

      stella vadakin 

      3 years ago from 3460NW 50 St Bell, Fl32619

      Hi, great Hub and I agree with a lot that you are saying. If you're in a good relationship as you get older you find out how truly you are loved when your spouse has to take care of you. Everything can change and a real love can stand the test. Great writing.

    • BarbRad profile image

      Barbara Radisavljevic 

      4 years ago from Templeton, CA

      A person I much respect explained the difference concisely in this statement: "Love can wait to give. Lust can't wait to get."

    • shara63 profile image


      4 years ago from Delhi

      Wonderful post of analysis of love & complement your thoughts here is my poem (was composed in my teen age)-

      Love is not an acute infection,

      Love is not the body inflammation;

      Love is neither a longing,

      Nor the love is stubborns' belonging;

      Love can never be an infatuation,

      Love is giving, not expectation;

      Love is the 'Feeling' treasured within,

      Love brings GOOD and not the SIN.

    • profile image


      4 years ago

      I agree with most of your assessment on love and lust. But I personally believe that love can very easily lead to lust without necessarily meaning that you lack respect for your partner. And also you can love someone without being obsessively thinking about them when you close your eyes. I believe that love can be approach differently based on individual character.

      Either way, the views above are awesome ;)

    • Kukata Kali profile image

      Kukata Kali 

      4 years ago

      Love; the force that connects, doesn't seem comparable to lust. Lust is a connective emotion, therefore it has the potential to be a loving act. I don't ever want a lover (sexually speaking) doesn't have a passionate lust as a driving force. Lust gets a bad wrap because it's weighted with religious rhetoric. An experience with lust doesn't have to be negative thing. It just is. It's human. Love, that things that drives us together is powerful, and all things that happen in that realm of action is fair game. Best to carry all of your wisdom throughout your human experiences to determine what experiences are most beneficial. However, just to reiterate, sex without a strong desire to do so....wack.

      Great hub! Thanks for getting the wheels turning~

    • skye2day profile image


      4 years ago from Rocky Mountains

      Hello dear friend. I do pray this finds you and yours blessed and shining in the love of God. Love what a deep topic your chose to write about. You did very well staying on track! I tend to go off on rabbit trails especially such large topics. Love and Lust a good one. Well one thing I know for absolute is God is Love. If he is in the center of the relationship the love will not fail. If he is not then doom is inevitable. I have done them all. I praise God today I am in a loving relationship love of my life and God is the center of us. Love never fails and God is love. Nice to see you again. Do stop in for a visit. My Love to you and yours. Keep going on your writing! You are doing great. Hugs to you dearest paulynice. Skye

    • Dr Pran Rangan profile image

      Dr Pran Rangan 

      5 years ago from Kanpur (UP), India

      A nice comparison between love and lust. I agree with you fully. Thanks.

    • atechwiz profile image


      5 years ago

      A very nice hub. You clearly understand and convey the differences between love and lust. Well done.

    • liesl5858 profile image

      Linda Bryen 

      5 years ago from United Kingdom

      Hello! well said Paulynice, although you are young you seem to have knowledge about this love and lust things. Well done and thanks for the follow.

    • paulynice roldens profile imageAUTHOR

      Roldens Paulynice 

      5 years ago from Boca Raton, Florida

      Thanks for all your comments.........

    • Hariom Singhal profile image


      5 years ago from INDIA (Haryana) SAMPLA

      I put a question on this hub related with love and lust.See and answer

    • Lor's Stories profile image

      Lor's Stories 

      5 years ago from Central New Jersey

      Love. It's all about love.

    • KEckerle profile image


      5 years ago from Currently near Surprise, AZ

      Well done. I frequently tell folks to wait and let a relationship really develop. Unfortunately, few seem to listen!

    • the Blue sun profile image

      Larry D. Hudson 

      5 years ago from Lake Charles, LA Thanks for following , The Blue Sun your hubs are very educational to me very well put together you even gave me many new ideals. Thanks a BUNCH! Hope you will visit more often, Thanks......

    • Spongy0llama profile image

      Jake Brannen 

      5 years ago from Canada

      I completely agree with the dichotomy you outline. Care and affection are definitely something separate from the pure sexual desires of lust. Of course, they are also closely bound with one another, otherwise cheating wouldn't be as terrible an offense.

    • profile image


      5 years ago

      Excellent hub and so true.

    • Drew A Blanc profile image

      Drew A Blanc 

      5 years ago from the Central California Coast

      Interesting perspective between the two driving forces of our nature. Good work! It's my assertion that both love and lust need to be part of a lasting relationship -

    • Ebonny profile image


      5 years ago from UK

      It is certainly worth knowing the difference between love and lust. Voted up.

    • shara63 profile image


      5 years ago from Delhi

      Paulynice Roldens, your age and your level of thinking...its unbelievable dear !...i can challenge here.. even most of the established ones with many publications out here dont have that level of thinking and judgement..perhaps this is Sagitarian effect? did a wonderful assessment that confirms .. you are a born Thinker & writer !! Congrats man !! .....I'm proud of Voting you UP!!

    • Anna Sternfeldt profile image

      Anna Sternfeldt 

      5 years ago from Svenljunga, Sweden

      This was interesting and I agree on the difference between lust and love. Sure, it is wonderful when lust and love co-operate :-) when you have both feelings for the same person, but that is as you say not always the case. I can tell that have felt huge lust for a few men that I just wanted to ran very far away from (which I also have done :-) ), because they would be really bad for me, and I haven't loved them, not even liked them, just felt this lust. So sometimes your body can react on its own, with no heart and no compassion. But then I can use my mind and decide to not follow the lust...if I prefer to have it together with love, which I do.

    • profile image


      5 years ago

      The word "heart" is considered to be a figurative way of expressing an emotion that comes from within ones spiritual being, while the "Brain" gets no recognition for it's extaordinary ability to experience the many emotions it was designed too interact. Thus, if always speaking in figurative format...How will one know the true Meaning or Emotion entwined with Love or Lust, for both are actually one in the same. Given a more display of the term "LOVE" : question- How much do you care for me? answer- With every once of my Spiritual and Soul Being? The most profound connection between two individuals. One would have to search the depths of their overall being to even be able to go that in depth with their common everyday usage of words in order to explain the emotion called "Love" literally.

    • carrie Lee Night profile image

      Carrie Lee Night 

      5 years ago from Northeast United States

      paulynice roldens: Sometimes we forget what real love is and what it means, thank you for the reminder. Very interesting and well thought through article :)

    • jimagain profile image


      5 years ago from Hattiesburg, Mississippi

      This should be required reading for anyone songwriter or scriptwriter who routinely distorts the meaning of love as lust; and for any one contemplating a relationship with someone else. before they say, "I love you" to someone else, they should have to be able to know the difference between them. Sadly, many do not.

    • mollymeadows profile image

      Mary Strain 

      5 years ago from The Shire

      You're right, Paulynice. I think most people instinctively understand the difference, but not everyone is honest enough to admit it. Kudos to you for speaking the truth!

    • Abluesfornina profile image

      S Marie 

      5 years ago

      Hmm really interesting take on love and lust. I'm for love because it covers all territory in the relationship. Lust can get you killed and it has. People easily lose their minds when in lust and lust don't care about nobody. Enjoyed the read.

    • profile image


      5 years ago

      Interesting article. I have seen lust in what is possibly it's worst form. My mother is a drug addict and she use to but I don't know if she still does use sex to get drugs and she does not feel anything for the men when she has sex with them. I hope to wait until I meet someone whom I know I will love and respect and want to spend my life with before I have sex. I do not want to end up like my shameful mother.

    • paulynice roldens profile imageAUTHOR

      Roldens Paulynice 

      5 years ago from Boca Raton, Florida

      Thank you to all of you...

    • Amy Becherer profile image

      Amy Becherer 

      5 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      As I was reading your well-written article, paulynice roldens, I was thinking back on different people I have known and I couldn't find one exception to your words. Although, your explanations related to the difference between love and lust should be apparent, it often is not in the heat of the moment. It is often what follows that relays the intentions. For me personally, it is always best to wait until I feel comfortable, at ease, and trust the person before I make, what may ultimately be, regrettable choices. After all, love is patient.

      Thank you for a reassuring, informative and interesting read.

    • epigramman profile image


      5 years ago

      ....some people here at the Hub turn my head but you just turned my head 360 degrees full circle. You write as if you were born to write and to communicate with the power and the force and with the sheer magnifience of words. And in these words are boundless displays of your intellect and passion - always an unbeatable combination for any writer to entertain and enlighten his readers - and the bottom line - your rhetoric, your theories in this hub thesis allows your readers to engage in a debate and to think and to feel - hubravo from the epi-man for this stunning exercise in writing and provoking my mind.

      sending you warm wishes from lake erie time ontario canada 6:44pm

    • normanwinkfield profile image

      Norman Winkfield 

      6 years ago from Chicago, Illinois

      Hello Paulynice, That's a fascinating name. I love it. It sound like you're a very nice person. I want to praise you for doing a good job on a very difficult subject --love and lust. Also welcome as a follower of mind. I appreciate that. you have made my day. Keep the good writing up. Let me know if I can be of any help to you.

    • paulynice roldens profile imageAUTHOR

      Roldens Paulynice 

      6 years ago from Boca Raton, Florida

      Thank you my friend@ Natashalh for your comment.

    • Natashalh profile image


      6 years ago from Hawaii

      I agree with your assessment. I think love can, and should, cohabitate with lust, but lust can certainly exist without love. As a woman, it's pretty easy for me to tell if a guy is talking to me at work, school, or where ever, simply because he is imaging a world in which I go home with him, or if he's actually listening to what I'm saying.


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