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The Differences between Sex and Love

Updated on August 16, 2015

Sex and Love are are twin sisters

What is the difference between love and sex? Is it possible to love someone without having sex?

Yes, there are difference between love and sex, but because they look twin sisters, people are confused. That's why when men said to naive virgins: "If you love me, then have sex with me." The ignorant succumbed to this disinformation. If he respect your body, he will ask you to keep your body holy for your wedding night.

You can love a person without having sex. Having sex does not mean you love a person. Sound confusing?

Love is more than just a romantic feeling because such 'puppy love' feelings come and go. In most relationships, these feelings last for only a few months. Love is a commitment to stick to a person at all times, whether in good times or bad times, with good teeth or with bad breath, in good health or bedridden, in youthful beauty or in wrinkled ugliness, in wealth or in poverty.

According to Gary Chapman in his book "The Five Love Languages", love can be expressed in five ways - spending quality time, gifts, acts of service, physical touch and words of affirmation.

Sex is one way to express love. But sex is not always not always an expression of love. To some men, it is a release of a physical urge. When he is hungry he eats. When he has the sexual urge, he visits a sex therapist. In this instance, there is no love attached in the physical act. So it is possible for a man to make love to a woman without loving her.

Another difference between sex and love - sex lasts only while it stands but love lasts whether it stands or not.

Is it possible to love someone without having sex? Of course! How could it be possible to make love to all the people we love? How we wish.

We, corporate slaves (oops I mean workers), spend more time in our cubicles than in our bedroom or living room. The way we decorate our cubicles is a manifestation of our personality. When you see rows of photos plastered on the walls and potted plants surround the cubicle, you realise that the cubicle is a replica of our home.

Do you know that you can speed read your colleague's personality by looking at the cubicle? What can you tell? The cubicle tells you about the person's communication style, the way he makes decision, solving problem, his management style and work preference.

There are four kinds of people and they are characterised by four types of cubicles. Using the acronym H.O.M.E., there are the homely cubicle, the orderly cubicle, messy cubicle and the empty cubicle.

Homely Cubicle

The homely cubicle is one which you find lots of posters and photos plastered on the wall, trophies in the cabinet and potted plants lining camouflaging the entrance. You fill at home in this type of cubicle as the owner attempts to replicate the warmth of home in her second home.

Orderly Cubicle

Every object on the table has its own place in an orderly cubicle. It must remained why it should be. If you attempt to shift any of the items, the owner will re-arrange it to its originally position. It is a perfectly neat cubicle, fit to be a showroom.

Messy Cubicle

You will find stacks of documents stacked on top of each other and it seems chaotic and messy. But the owner knows where to find that documents hidden beneath somewhere. Don't try to rearrange the mess. The cubicle gives an impression that the owner is overwhelmed with lots of paperwork.

Empty Cubicle

The table is minimal and only the bare essential can be found on the table.

What does these cubicles tell about the owner?

'Homely' Person

The homely person is a communicator. He is people orientated rather than task orientated. He is emotional and loves to talk. Music and spiritual issues are his pet subject. He values feelings. They are usually fun loving people .

'Orderly' Person

He is a neat person and he is an organiser. As a perfectionist and a meticulous person, he strives in the administration, account , quality control and auditing field. As a conservative, he prefers the tried and proven ways rather than exotic new ways of doing things. In decision making, whether to buy a PC or go for a meal, he looks for vendor's reputation. He makes a great planner as he sees things in a systematic way such as sequence, details and organisation. He values form. The packaging is important to him. He is the opposite of the 'messy person'. He preferred the tested and proven way. He probably eat the same kind of food everyday. He is predictable and strive on structure. He dislikes surprise and avoid risk. He makes the rules and is a rule-abiding person.

'Messy' Person

He is a visionary. He is imaginative, artistic and able to think out of the box. He is guided by his intuition. He can see the big picture. He is a good idea person. He values freedom. He hates to be constraint by the rules. Ask him where he wants to go for a meal, he prefer something exotic or new. He is adventurous. He likes to try new things, new food. He is a risk taker and like surprise. He dislike close supervision and is likely to break rules to get things done. He is a maverick.

'Empty' Person

As a logician he measure things in terms of facts and quantity. He probably won't bring his girl friend out on Valentine Day because he reckon that the flowers and the dinners are cheaper on the day after. Compared to the homely person, he is not romantic and not spontaneous in his feelings. As an analytical person, he enjoys problem solving, mathematics and technical stuff. Most engineers and nerds probably fall into this category. He is goal oriented. When it comes to shopping, his criteria is value for money. They are usually serious people.

There you have it! Now you can walk into any cubicle and read their personality in 1 minute. Let me know if it is true.

Sam Choo is an internet marketing coach at


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    • Tatjana-Mihaela profile image


      10 years ago from Zadar, CROATIA

      Great hub, clear and honest. I agree with you completely. Love is love, only sometimes connected with sexuality. Just to add one fact: with learning how from man, woman also can have sex instead of love-making.

      Thank you for this hub.


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