The Envious Friend

Envy is not a good trait for anyone. I live in a small village which consists of one hundred and fifty people.

As a foreigner, living in Croatia I have experienced many challenges.

In trying to communicate, and in searching for the need to be with true people.

To be accepted, to be friendly in the possible ways, to be together on occasion, and mostly, to be part of this community.

The feeling of belonging to this crowd and for me to be myself. Every time I think that I have finally found some friend or an acquaintance something does not go well. I shouldn't call her a friend if she is envious.

Only, the local people know how to prepare a meal. They look at me as if to say i am clueless about preparing a meal. I recently found a friend and was quite pleased with the friendship of this woman.

I observed her behaviour and saw that she has a chip on her shoulder. This woman does not like it when I talk to her close friends. Often, she has a look on her face when I communicate with her close friends. The look that shows I should not speak to them.

Her envious look of her says how she feels toward me. I realize, there is no chance of me finding a friend without some nonsense going on.

It is difficult to be in a place where I must forever prove myself to others.

I have not tried to prove myself to these people and it is something I will not do for anyone. I do feel a kind of pressure on myself when I am with such people.

I do not need her friendship it is just her company as neighbours. I know it is only right to be friendly living close to each other. I see how she dislikes it when others talk to me, the envious stares from her allow me to see the true person she is.

The envious person does not like it when people hug me in her presence it is not a good idea. I enjoy talking to people and laughter is great when in happy conversations.

I prefer spending time with positive people. Lately, I feel my energy has been drained from me, just being with her had made me feel that way.

Envy is an evil action toward others.

When people behave this way, it is best to keep away and do what makes you happy and fulfilled.

People change all the time all her smiles and conversations mean nothing to me.

Foreigners are treated as strangers. Their simple conversations are okay. They choose not to include us in their conversations which I do not mind.

I do respect the privacy of others. I, too, will not want to share my private life with anyone. The mentality is different and that makes a huge difference to me. In one moment, there is laughter and conversation. At times it would be too confusing to me.

I often receive mixed signals from the local people, I keep to myself to avoid friction between us. It is an ugly situation to be with envious people, they pretend to like you. If you fall in for their false behaviours, you will be crushed.

I know it is hard to understand a person with a different mentality. I try to mingle on certain occasions.

I have forgiven the many incidents we have been through and have moved on. Sometimes there is only that much one can take from envious people.

One must quit that friendship and be happier and not feel overworked in keeping such friendships.

It is not how good friendships, work out. Envy is not a pretty emotion.

When in a room with strange people there is tension and a sense of insecurity among them. I have been there and coped well with the situation.

Everybody wants to show they are better than the other in some way. This can be from their intelligence, their beauty, or who has a better life. Envious people are bitter and are backstabbers.

They always want what you have and will do anything to get even with you.

''I can do better than you.''

Psychologically envious people feel less powerful. We have been living in our new place for almost two years the people around me are the most envious crowd. Maybe I feel this way because of their mentalities, but this can be so frustrating.

For example:

We have our terrace undercover.

When it rains, it is still possible for us to sit outside and enjoy a barbecue. One person did the same at his house. He built a roof to cover his terrace.

What differences we have, they also want to do in their homes. I overlook most of these envious behaviours. I do not want to stoop down to their level of thinking in such a way.

The challenges here are certainly challenges. It is hard to cope with and hard to get out of it.

I try my best to avoid envious people. I have my life and I live as I wish. In this modern time, it should be a bit different.

However, it is not like that in a small community, everybody knows what goes on in other people's lives. One should not become bitter with envy.

Good relationships are fostered by envy and affect you emotionally, your security and stability. I am not a victim of this and would not let myself fall apart or become weak. It is a traumatic experience if you let envy take over your life.

Do you wish you had the other woman's hairstyle or hair colour?

Instead, you should be complimenting the individual on how good their hair colour or hairstyle looks at them, rather than wishing you had that same kind.

I am disappointed in the way a foreigner is treated here, especially, in my case living here for that long and the people still cannot find it in their hearts to accept me. Envious people are in this world, I feel it is much harder in a small community to live with such people.

When individuals are envious, they judge others and their situations. It is the act of conflict that leads people to doubt their values and experiences, their discomfort and suffering.

Once you realize that your values are a result of your condition you tend to undervalue the greatest human qualities. Such as compassion, affection, good energy, and a positive mind. You reconnect with your very own goodness for yourself.

Congratulate each other on the great achievements, do not turn your back on each other. Envy is not a healthy move up to your higher power do not let envy destroy you. People succeed and envious people try their level best to spoil it.

''I want what you have.''

''I will buy what you have, even if I am not able to afford it, I will make sure to have it.''

Anger and harsh conversations with envious people can make you feel unhappy but are not worth getting into.

I am fine with what is and will be better if I work towards my goals. I enjoy being with people, but often certain people show their envy directly and make me feel angry.

I avoid anger and add more fuel to the fire the look on their faces does not scare me.

It is just the way I am, you either like me, or you do not accept me or not. They cannot take away my happy character which is so loved by my many friends around me.