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The Secret way to a Man's Heart

Updated on May 15, 2016

You have often heard people saying that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. This in my understanding means that as long as you can cook great food, you have his heart in the palm of your hands. It is not necessarily wrong, but it certainly is far from adequate. Well, men do love good food, but so do women. So to imagine that food alone will win the heart of that dude you have been eyeing for a while might not be full proof strategy.

Many times you will meet a guy who will be crazy head over heels about you and treat you like the queen of his life. But as you start to think that the two of you make a great couple, he starts pulling away leaving you wondering what you didn’t do right. It can be devastating. The story is worse if you have slept together a few times because you will start to lament about how he used you, and then disappeared. Men are naturally less expressive than women. They are thus often miss-understood when it comes to relationship affairs. I would like to share with you tips on how to win and keep his heart from a man’s point of view.

How to keep a man's Heart

Be a happy independent woman

Men are really attracted to independent women who have a life. (see signs of a successful marriage)You need to enjoy life and let it show through hobbies and spending quality time with your friends. Avoid being too needy or clingy. He needs to see that you don’t need his presence to be happy or his approval to determine the value in you. He needs to feel that his presence in your life adds to his own happiness rather than cause stress. Make him laugh. Your man needs to feel good about you and being around you. When a man sees his woman happy and having fun, he will be compelled to crave her company, and will do everything in his power to keep you by his side. You have problems and he will want to help you with them. But don’t be too quick to show desperation especially for financial assistance. Show a desire and ability to deal with your problems without them over interfering in your happiness. By doing this you will come off as strong minded and independent. Don’t forget however that your man has a natural instinctive desire to be your provider and knight in shining armor. So as you show off independence, don’t push him away too much.

Don’t be controlling

Men (like women) need their independence. Show concern about his lifestyle, but don’t try to be his mother, choosing what he should and shouldn’t do. The quickest way to lose a man is by taking away his freedom. If there is something you’d like to change about him, be gentle, mature and patient about it. If you get moody or pissed every time he’s out watching soccer, or you come up with excuses to try and prevent him from doing some activities away from you, chances are high you are being a little selfish and this is a complete turn off for most men I know. Don’t require him to take you with him whenever he wants to go out? Let him desire it. Try not to get hurt because he hasn’t taken you with him. Instead go out with your friends and have some fun. When you appear, happy he will want to be with you. Women believe that men are naturally promiscuous and so the best way to keep a man is by tight marking him. This is so counterproductive. There is little if anything; you can do to prevent him from cheating if he wants to. In fact the harder you try to stop him, the more you will push him into it.

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Good Character

This cannot be emphasized enough. Physical beauty can attract a man but it won’t keep him for long. No serious man wants to be associated with an obnoxious woman who shouts and jeers at waiters, or taxi drivers, or colleagues at work. You need to be a lady in order to keep him interested. Mind your language and how you express yourself both in public and in private. This doesn’t mean you should be walking on egg shells whenever you are around your man. Rather be natural and comfortable being courteous to others. Avoid using offensive language while talking about other people. Talking ill of your ex-boyfriends, even if they hurt you so bad will scare him into thinking that he is no exception. Mind your appearance and social etiquette. Always be well groomed, well dressed and organized. Try to be mindful and respectful of other people’s feelings. Apologize whenever you do something wrong because you are not perfect and he doesn’t expect you to be. Try to stay composed even in highly exciting situations. Losing your head in public over a small matter is highly unacceptable.

Prepare good food

On top of the above, it is essential that you have some decent cooking skills. Men are attracted to women who can cook good food, but not because men love food much more than women do. In a Man’s instincts, a woman who knows how to cock provides nutritional security in the home. This is essential for healthy development of his offspring. Remember that the primary natural reason for his attraction to your beauty and your great character and personality is to mate, and there after produce strong healthy offspring. A woman who makes good food brings a sense of stability in the home. Her children will always be satisfied and will grow strong and healthy. Her husband will be proud to work hard every day to bring food home and have his meals at home.

There is certainly no full-proof way of keeping a man, but If you can keep these tips close, you will almost certainly find the way to his heart.

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    • ian 12am profile image

      Ian Batanda 23 months ago

      Thank you for that insightful comment

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 23 months ago

      The secret to winning anyone's heart is to get to know them as an {individual}. Find out what (his) likes and dislikes are.

      Give him what he wants and needs the way he wants and needs it!

      There are no "gender shortcuts".

      Take the time to personally get to know someone!

      It's important to also be willing to accept rejection if in order to "win his heart" you have to stop being yourself. You deserve to be loved for who (you) are!

      No one can sustain happiness without being true to them self!

      One man's opinion!:)