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The Way I Cope With and Defeat Arrogance--And it Works Every time

Updated on February 2, 2015
Tom Brady, quarterback, New England Patriots
Tom Brady, quarterback, New England Patriots
Brady always looks perfect for he wants you to think that he is perfect
Brady always looks perfect for he wants you to think that he is perfect

Meet the "Arrogant Beast"

I am at a tough area of frustration. I have met a beast that cannot be humbled by mortal man. How I wish that it was a comic book villain that I was dealing with. Honestly, I'd prefer facing the diabolical Lex Luthor (without Superman's help) every day of he week. But sadly, this beast I call "arrogance," will never be tamed. Or never will be in my lifetime. It's been this way since Satan defiled the Garden of Eden as well as the lives of Adam and Eve.

Fact is, Satan was created by God and was one of the most-handsome angelic creatures in Heaven. But later on, Satan became victim to the then-infant beast: Arrogance and from Satan it ate the humble disposition of numerous people and grew into a gigantic "beast of insufferable pain," who is right now roaming the borders of the free world and frankly, anywhere it pleases.

This beast made from vomit and demon's defication bit me in 1975. Until this year, I was pretty easy-going and fun to be around. Honestly,I did not know or care about whom or what arrogance was or meant and the harm it could do if not resisted.

When Brady talks, he gets his way
When Brady talks, he gets his way

Just what is Arrogance?

  • Arrogance (also called Hubris) indicates strong pride or acting extremely self-important. In particular, a loss of contact with reality and overestimating one's own competence or capability.
  • Arrogance is also associated with lack of humility and love toward oneself. Examples include making oneself far more important than others or superiority. Children raised around arrogance may be arrogant themselves.
  • Arrogance is usually detrimental and fosters a negative-minded culture. Some sources, however, also indicate arrogance means taking and receiving pride with one's work.
  • Arrogance is different from confidence. Arrogance may be associated with insecurity. Confidence has an association with improving and examining one's own weaknesses.

Source: Wikipedia

When the "Arrogant Beast" bites, you know it

I will not soon forget the night I saw the late Country Music singer, Conway Twitty on some television show and I felt the "Arrogance Beast" tear a hunk of my human spirit out of me and stood by laughing at me and the resentment I had toward this singer who gave off the image of: "Hey, girls, single and married. I am a famous, once good looking singer who is in fact a 'sex god,' behind the scenes."

I am not telling a lie. Twitty worked the camera like a professional pole dancer in a smoky gentleman's club, "The Bim Bam Club," on the lower, rougher side of town. Yes, the females in the audience and I suppose the females at home watching him on television loved every minute of it. I asked myself why to myself. This middle-aged man with no chiseled waist or body built by dedication to a gym. Just a headful of hair kept firm by a can of hairspray and that fake growling voice. Enough!

Many shed tears of sadness when he passed. I didn't. And looking back, if I had "cried" it would just be me acting to be sad when I wasn't. I wasn't a hypocrite.

The ate Conway Twitty
The ate Conway Twitty
Man, that Tom Brady is one "tough" guy
Man, that Tom Brady is one "tough" guy
Conway Twitty trying to project the image of being a love god
Conway Twitty trying to project the image of being a love god

The "Beast" will grow as it devours

This beast has been taking bites out of my spirit over the years and somehow, I grew used to this torture. That was until I saw Tom Brady, "Mr. Perfect," in an NFL game one Sunday afternoon. Then the "Arrogant Beast," took a bigger bite of my spirit when Brady, in his perfect fashion, smiled that "Look at me," smile at the sidelines camera. What is this guy trying to prove? I debated to myself.

Okay. Brady was then, and still now, one of the "select few," men in the world who cannot err or make errors of any kind. Do not get your ire up for I am telling the truth. When did you ever read about or see Tom Brady make JUST ONE mistake on or off the gridiron? No, you haven't for NFL authorities fear Brady and his arrogant looks and disposition. Even the local police where Brady lives in his multi-billion-dollar apartment fear him for they must think that one word from Brady to God and they are history.

Ashton Kutcher, another arrogant actor
Ashton Kutcher, another arrogant actor
Oh, my! What is Perfect Tom Brady upset about
Oh, my! What is Perfect Tom Brady upset about
Former vice-president, Dick Cheney, one of the most-arrogant people ever to live in the White House
Former vice-president, Dick Cheney, one of the most-arrogant people ever to live in the White House
Tom Brady flexes his "muscle." A sign of how good HE is
Tom Brady flexes his "muscle." A sign of how good HE is
Rob Growski, tight end, New England Patriots, who praised Tom Brady during Media Days at Super Bowl 49
Rob Growski, tight end, New England Patriots, who praised Tom Brady during Media Days at Super Bowl 49
Jerry Seinfeld not only arrogant, but smug too
Jerry Seinfeld not only arrogant, but smug too
Speaker of The House, Boehner, who told how he worked his way through college with having lots of jobs. But Mr. Speaker, that was years ago
Speaker of The House, Boehner, who told how he worked his way through college with having lots of jobs. But Mr. Speaker, that was years ago

How do you spot an Arrogant Person?

Here are some easy ways to avoid being embarrassed by people such as Tom Brady, Shawn White and others:

  • Arrogant persons always expect lackies such as myself to beg for their autograph. Thereby they all carry ink pens in their writing hands.
  • Arrogant persons are used to being served and waited on for every need from huge to small. People like Ashton Kutcher, another arrogant soul, just has to form his lips to whatever he needs and his underpaid, lower class entourage runs over themselves to get whatever ne needs.
  • Arrogant persons while being interviewed by (a) Jay Leno or Letterman, are not required to answer questions like common people. The Tom Bradys of the world merely grunt or giggle, perfectly of course, and the host and audience almost die from hard laughter.


David Letterman: "So, Tom Brady, you are THE only perfect man and athlete in our world, so what was your strategy in winning the Super Bowl?"

Brady: (grins at audience. Flashes his teeth). "Uhhh, well, I uh, played . . ."

Letterman and audience goes nuts with laughter.

If you ask me, such behavior and arrogance makes me sick to my stomach? Am I talking to anyone else WHO IS READING this story?

  • Arrogant persons look at you like you are a fool if you merely speak to them in a humble manner.
  • Arrogant persons (today) not only look as if they are better than you, but they will tell you in a few words, "Listen, common man. I am a super-famous and wealthy person, and my very words cause people to fear and worship me, so why am I even speaking to you?"
  • Arrogant persons always have "that" mouth that hangs half-open as if that were a sign of superior status.
  • Arrogant persons cannot survive unless they have THE best of everything--homes, cars, yachts, food, wives, children, pets, and clothing. Do you see the price that the "Arrogant Beast" makes you pay for going from common to super-sickening and arrogant.
  • Arrogant persons never call anyone for anything. Restaurants, television networks and movie studios call them every day around the clock and are even honored to be rejected by (a) Bill Billichick, arrogant coach of arrogant Tom Brady.

Other Arrogant People

  • George Clooney
  • Jimmy Fallon
  • Madonna
  • Jerry Seinfield
  • Dan Patrick
  • Alex O'Laughlin
  • James Caan
  • Will Smith
  • Kayne West
  • Prince Charles
  • O.J. Simpson
  • Shawn White

Source: Me. Kenneth Avery

Enter my working defense against Arrogance

Somewhere near the 10th grade, I recall an anger-fest where me and a buddy were made to feel low simply because we refused to glorify folksinger, Bob Dylan due to a new song that he has just released. My buddy and I were not fans of Dylan. Not that we found anything wrong with his character. We just did not follow him.

Our out-and-out refusal angered a few of our so-called friends to the point of one asking me, "I do not see why you and your friend for once cannot take time to lift Bob Dylan up to the level he has earned." I replied with a one word answer, "Why?" The misguided girl returned an uneducated, "Cuz!" And if my friend and I had not walked away, that asinine conversation would still be going on today.

I've found this "defense" useful over the years. Just being cool and not going nuts yelling praise and falling to worship any celebrity who comes down the pike.

And even in February of 2015, I have yet to hear one sensible answer to my simple question of "Why?"


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    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Hi, Marie,

      Amen. Love your comment. But I was not pronouncing anyone's eternal reward/punishment. I was *judging/discerning a trait that just irks me. That's all. If I could meet everyone on this hub, I would not have a problem telling them how they are MORE talented and productive and important than I will ever be.

      And . . ."He that exhalteth himself shall be abased. He that abaseth himself shall be exhalteth."

      Honest, Marie. I was not judging these or anyone.

      Fact: Only God has the right to be arrogant, but He is not. Imagine that.

      Hey, keep in touch with me.

      Your comment tonight, Feb. 23, made me feel good.

    • Marie Flint profile image

      Marie Flint 

      3 years ago from Jacksonville, Florida USA

      I have a wonderful affirmation for arrogance, it goes: I AM the hand of God in action / gaining victory every day / my pure soul's great satisfaction is to walk the middle way.

      Judge not, lest ye be judged. ***

    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama


      Yes, sir, you sure do. I m serious. Arrogance in others can cause you trouble and arrogance in yourself can turn people away. I hate to be so straight-forward, but do beware of arrogance.

      And thank you for this comment.

    • vkwok profile image

      Victor W. Kwok 

      3 years ago from Hawaii

      Now I know what to look out for.

    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Dear vocalcoach,

      Thanks so much for your comment. I have had a huge problem with arrogance since 1966. I have tried prayer, counseling, and it still pops up with some athletes and celebrities. Where are the common people and why doesn't our press ever give them any space for the good they do? I mean the Salvation Army, St. Jude's Children's Hospital and more.

      Oh well. One day, when life is over, EVERYONE will stand equal before a just God. Then these problems will vanish.

    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama


      I am aware of Brady's work ethic. But this does not license him to be so acid one year when Florida was playing someone he liked in some bowl. Well, the Gators put a beating on Brady's team he was pulling for and he never owned up to making his snide remark. And I guess the members of the press, rather than tell the truth, just patted him on the back.

      This was not about jealousy. But arrogance. I would be willing to wager YOU or anyone here all of the cash I have on hand that he and I could never be friends and when we talked, he would barely ask anything of you four and myself, simply because people on his level are NOT interested in others.

      I am sorry that you misunderstood. I guess it was the "beast" biting me again. But me asking why I should admire or worship Brady or anyone, I can only ask why.

    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Hi, lbrummer,

      Sorry that my hub missed the mark, and it wasn't about jealousy at all. Like I told Romeos Quill, I had to endure four arrogant guys in the sixth grade who were this way until we all graduated and they all, for some reason, NEVER like me at all. And God as my witness, I tried to be good to them and it did not work.

      In my 23 years in the newspaper business, I worked with this one guy who was like Tom Brady in every respect. He wouldn't talk that much. Just stand and look important and would not keep his cubicle clean. I did. And did it as a favor to him. Yes, he took advantage of me.

      it was like sixth-grade all over again.

      The boss always took his side although he was wrong. It was pure sickening. And I can put this all in perspective.

      You are ALL right. It is not Brady's fault that much. It is the press fault for all they do is write him up to be on a higher pedestal than we are.

      Just like they did Michael Jordan, Kenny Rogers, and other arrogant celebrities.

      I do respect your opinions. I was just unloading some unwanted baggage.

    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      3 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Romeos Quill,

      Sure the Patriots won. That was not my point. But since you said this, let me ask you if the guy who is a Patriot employee, who was caught on film tampering with those deflated footballs, do you really think that he will receive any punishment? Honestly.

      And let me tell you a quick story about Conway. A dear friend of mine and his wife were invited to go with his boss to meet Conway backstage, this was years ago, so they went backstage and his boss introduced him to Conway who did not offer his hand to him, just snubbed him and walked away. I do not call this humbleness. I call this rude.

      And since I was in the sixth grade, these four uppity guys were so like Tom Brady and although Brady may not be arrogant, these guys were and at an early age I have always hated arrogance in anyone.

      I am sorry for the confusion. Thank you for the comment.

      Take care.

    • Romeos Quill profile image

      Romeos Quill 

      3 years ago from Lincolnshire, England

      Did the New England Patriots win? ;)

      Just googled about George Clooney and his charity

      bloke it seems.

      Never met any of those guys and gal on your list Kenneth but have heard Conway Twitty sing and as far as popular music goes, his singing talent has to be right up there with Presley and the Big 'O'. Certainly respect the talent and hard work some of these folk put into their respective fields, but can sympathize that a cult of minor celebrities who are (in)famous for having very little ability and/or seeking self-glorification can be a bit of a turn off.

      I guess some folk are an acquired taste.

      Best Wishes;


    • lions44 profile image

      CJ Kelly 

      3 years ago from Auburn, WA

      I realize you meant this article in jest, but I'm going to give a defense of Tom Brady. He was a sixth round draft choice in 2000. Couldn't run, not a great arm and not a MENSA member either. But hard work and great study habits got him where he is today. And I think that should only be admired. Much of the criticism reaped upon him is out of jealousy. He outworked the rest of the NFL and they don't like it. Future players should take he heed (i.e. Manziel). Think I have a hub idea. Voted up.

    • lbrummer profile image

      Loraine Brummer 

      3 years ago from Hartington, Nebraska

      Sorry, I evidently missed your message here. I was expecting to read about how you, personally, overcame arrogance, and how your method works every time.

      I usually understand and enjoy your articles, but this one missed. It actually comes off sounding more like an article on jealousy. I detect anger rather than humor in this article.

      The only individual that you used in your examples, that I agree with, is Dick Cheney. I see confidence in the rest of the examples, not arrogance. Tom Brady is a great football player, Jerry Seinfeld is an outstanding comic, and George just great!

    • vocalcoach profile image

      Audrey Hunt 

      3 years ago from Idyllwild Ca.

      Interesting hub on arrogance - a trait I can't stand! I was surprised to see George Clooney on your list. I thought he was more down to earth than the others. But I don't know him personally.

      I'll be sharing this hub and thanks.



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