- Gender and Relationships
The Longest Three Day Rule
While sipping a drink at one of your favorite restaurants, you look across the room and see a guy who grabs your attention. He’s tall, proportionally muscular, has a magnetic smile, and a great fashion sense. Lucky you, you also catch his eye.
Before you know it, you are talking, laughing, and sharing a bite to eat—a connection you didn’t expect to happen so soon, but are pleasantly surprised! You are so enrapt in conversation that you don’t realize the establishment is about to close. To seal in the perfect night, he reaches into his pocket, takes out his phone, and asks you for your number. He looks into your eyes and genuinely says he will call you over the weekend. To reassure his intentions, he tells you that he would love to see you again, take you out to dinner, and that it’s been awhile since he’s felt a connection like this. You are a smitten kitten on cloud nine!
You try to contain yourself as you float all the way home with a grin on your face from ear-to-ear—you can’t stop thinking about him. Your body is buzzing with ecstasy. You can’t sleep, but you don’t care because your entire body is filled with joy that it fuels you with enough energy to get through the next day.
The following morning you wake up beaming! You’re excited, knowing that you are going to hear from him soon and can’t wait to tell your girlfriends about the great guy you just met.
Unfortunately, the day comes and goes and you don’t hear from him. Since the weekend isn’t technically over and most men tend to wait up to three days to call (ugh, why?), you tell yourself it’s O.K. You met on Friday night so if you don’t hear from him by Sunday, you should hear from him by Monday. The good news is, your social calendar is busy leaving you plenty of things to do to occupy your time until he calls.
It’s now Wednesday night and you still haven’t heard from him, making you question if you truly had a connection. The exciting feeling you were left with the night you met has started to dissipate. Although you don’t understand what happened, by the time the following Friday comes and he still hasn’t contacted you, whatever you thought you potentially felt for him has gone.
It’s Sunday (two weeks later) and you’re out to brunch with your girlfriends when your phone rings, “Hello?”
“This is she”
“Hey it’s______, how are you?” (As if no time had passed)
He decides to finally honor you with a call over two weeks later with no reason for his behavior? Did he not think about you once since he meet you? Not acceptable!
It seems as if the “three day rule” (which is ridiculous), has become a week long or longer rule. If a guy takes your phone number and he admits to a definite connection, waiting 16 days to call is ridiculous. Waiting even three days to call is silly. No one is that busy that they can’t find a few minutes to call, letting you know they are thinking of you.
When I have felt a strong connection with a guy, I want to hear from them within 24 hours. Hearing from a guy I really like within a day or two sparks that tingly, I-can’t-wait-to-see-and-kiss-him-feeling. When that feeling vanishes because he hasn’t called or texted, it’s hard to drum-up those same sexually fired emotions you felt in the beginning.
Ladies, there are women who enjoy the waiting game; usually these women are also dating other men. If you do thrive on it, then this man might be perfect for you. If not, ask yourself, “Do I really want to be with a guy who’s more into playing the waiting game than exploring the connection he claimed he felt?” If he decides to wait three days (or longer) he’s taking a gamble on you…and you’re worth more than that. Bottom line, men who play the waiting game have control issues. In retrospect, it’s a good thing they have not called sooner. Stay true to yourself and remember that men who wait to call will miss out…on you!