- Gender and Relationships
Things I've Learned to Live By
A Short List of Unwritten Rules I've Discovered.
Hi everyone! If you're like me, you have probably discovered some unwritten rules as you go through life. Some are nearly universal, or should be, and some may be unique to your situation. Some you may have discovered by breaking them inadvertently, some you saw illustrated by others, and some may have popped into your head in time to save you from making an embarrassing scene or worse.
Here's a list of rules I discovered. Some you might find funny, or interesting, or even boring, but they've helped me in different ways. So, here goes:
Don't Assume. I once worked in an office. When I first started, I often was in situations where I had to ask questions, and found that the people I had to talk to were often not in the office. They had gone out to lunch and, instead of being gone for only the usual hour, they were gone for two or three. This infuriated me, though I kept this inside. Finally, when it happened again, I decided to ask someone else, one of the department managers, where so-and-so was. I did it in a respectful, and inquisitive way, so as to not give away my true emotions. Well, the manager told me that 'so-and-so' was out in the field, conducting research for the next department project, and that this was common among many of the employees in my department. I was just an assistant at the time and, with what the manager had said, I was greatly relieved that I hadn't come out with a stupid outburst about people in the office taking 3 hour lunches and looking like the ultimate brainless idiot in the process! And I was grateful for the fact that the wind had been taken out of my sails with no one the wiser. What I had thought were 3 hour lunches were really half hour lunches followed by hard work being done for the company. Lesson learned, and fortunately, with no public humiliation for me or anyone else!
Watch That Wood! Basically, this means watch your step. Literally. I distribute flyers door to door for a living and walk on a variety of surfaces. I have found that, when wet, wooden steps and decks can be as slippery as ice. I fell once and had some close calls a few times involving wooden surfaces. Also, other surfaces can be bad, too. Smooth brick is one, as are marble like surfaces. And these can be anywhere, not just on people's front porches. So, look where you put your feet and, especially in wet weather, focus on your feet!
One Man's Trash is still His Trash. What this means is that, if you go to someone's home, or a place of business, and it is a veritable pig sty, don't act as if you lived there. If you have something to throw away, find a trash can. I had a friend once, whose place was a complete mess, with trash and newspapers strewn about. It was a shock the first time I'd visited. I had wrapper from a candy bar I'd just finished and was tempted to toss the wrapper to the floor, but my own thought of this stopped me, reminding myself that I was in someone else's house and didn't have the privilege of doing what I wanted, even if it was something the host did all the time. So, I saw where there was a trash can and deposited the wrapper in there, instead. As I've thought about this, I've seen that it not only applies in the literal sense, but in many situations.
For instnce, if your friend's father is a drunk and a louse, it's still not good to talk about him in front of your friend in those terms, even if your friend talks about him that way. Because, to your friend, the man is still his father.
Wait out the 'gotta have it' phase. If you're human, you most likely have bought something that you just had to have, only to find out later that you don't really need it, want it, or dislike it, for a myriad of reasons. Buyer's remorse. I've done this, too. And sometimes still do it, though much less than I used to. It's easy, especially in a culture where advertising is rampant and items are readily available for viewing.
That's not to say that your 'gotta have it' emotion is wrong, only that it pays to wait until this emotion fades a little and you can think more rationally about the item you want before you buy it. One way to do this is to research the item and to shop around. With research, you can learn more about it, what features it has, how it stacks up to it's competition, and what is said in reviews about it. The internet is a great tool for this. Also, going to see the item in person is great, too, as you'll see what it is really like. But be careful here, because you can also succumb more easily when the item is in hand, too.
Researching the item will also provide more time which will help you think more rationally about the item, and, you may discover a fatal flaw, or some other thing that takes the wind out of your sails and makes you see the item in a more realistic light, saving you from a purchase that you might regret.
So, these are just a few things I've learned to live by, and they've certainly helped me. Please tell me what things you live by that you've discovered going through life. Please feel free to comment and thank you for reading!