Tips on How to Restore a Broken Friendship
It has already been an established fact that people come and go. We can never oblige a particular person to stay in our lives if they don't want to anymore, not without any particular reason that will benefit them. This rule doesn't necessarily apply to a romantic relationship. Speaking from experience, this, too, applies in social interaction such as friendship.
Let me tell you a quick story:
I've had friends in the university that at first glance, I knew they were not temporary people and I wanted them to stay in my life for God knows how long. However, I've been in an on-off relationship with them. What does that mean exactly? These people are those, even though you were pretty close, something can really tear you guys apart.
Some might argue that if you're really friends, not a single thing can break that bond but let's face it, there are people who are bound to break your relationship one way or another. In our case, a rumor about being an unsupportive person, unemphatic friend, having a “wants everything all to myself” attitude happened.
Not to mention every small mishaps and little dirty details that we know about each other. Just a single push from an outside force triggered the bomb and it exploded.
After more than a year of eye-rolling, bumping along the hallways, ignoring when you really, desperately wanted to check up on each other, and awkward interaction, the band finally got together.
Like every other relationship, if the friendship is true, it will find its way back to you. How did that happen? Here are some tips on how one can rescue a broken friendship.
Talk it out. In every relationship ever, having an open communication is the key to restoring what you guys had. In our case, it turned out that most of the things we know and holding on to are false arguments and thoughts about each other that we oversee the fact that these reasons of tearing each other’s throats out might just be a story told by the people who wanted us apart.
Believe in them. That fact that you believe in all the things they say, even if it contradicts all the things you heard and everything you know is one of reasons why you guys are friends anyway. With opposing views, you get to listen on their side of the story and them to yours.
Do not seek out comfort from the opposite crew. Let's be real, those who spread out rumors are the people who gained in return of you guys going after each other. In that case, never be friends with those who were the reasons why the posse broke up. Yes, they will give you false comfort with their company but all they really do is to feed you lies and add gasoline to the fire.
Trust them. This isn't merely entrusting them with your secrets or the things that you don't want other people to know. Trust in them in a way that in every little thing they do, remember that they will never do it against you. They will never do things that they know will hurt you. And assure them that you will do the same.
Always choose them without judgment. Your friends might have done things that you can never attempt and vice versa but remember that these self-destructive acts might be a cry for help. Those who seem lost needed guidance the most and not eyebrow raises and criticism. With that in mind, no matter what they do, tell them how it affects you. Let them realize what needed to be done.
Change for the better. Misunderstanding arises when the qualities that should have been changed are encouraged and welcomed. Yes, friends should accept the way we are as a person but always remember that true friends will tell you your qualities that needs improvement and it's your duty not to take it as a disapproval but to act on it. Not just for them, but for yourself as well.
It is never wrong to cut people off of your life but then again, holding on to those who are dear to you is more important. Practicing active, positive communication is the key not only to restore broken friendships but in any other relationships, as well.
With that in mind, all of us will learn how to be very careful in every words that we say and in every action that we do that might sabotage our social relationship with others.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2020 Eymi Teves