- Gender and Relationships
How To Fix Your Marriage
Tips To Help Improve Your Marriage
There are always red flags when a marriage is starting to have some trouble. When you go to improve your marriage it is because you may have noticed one or more of these red flags pooping up. The trick to keeping a long happy marriage is to catch these red flags early and work on them before they become walls you can not breakdown. Some of the red flags are
(1) Lack of respect for one another - You may not see this one coming until damage to self esteem or trust has happened.
How you can spot with your self - Do your ever roll your eyes or just not listen when your husband or wife is talking? Do you ever think to your self how dum, or lame that something they are saying is? Do not care what their thoughts are on a topic? or do you ever think they are just so dum or always wrong? There are many more ways of spotting a lack of respect for your spouse than listed here.
How to work on it Pray for it - ask who ever you pray to open your heart and eyes to see all the wonderful things your spouse does. Also it is impossible to be mad at or even hate someone you pray for on a daily basis.
Remember- When you first got to gather what made you fall in love with your spouse. What was you most prove of for them. Though out your marriage what where somethings your spouse did or said that impressed you, or you wanted to brag about. Just keep thinking back till you have a big smile on your face and do everyday if you have to.
Make a list list of everything you love and respect about your souse, every joy, every proud moment add to that list often and read it often.
Stop criticizing - Who care if you wife messed a spot on the floor, or your husband forgot to shave or whatever. Don't pick on the small stuff. Like you heard before if you can not say something nice don't say anything at all. Even if asked, say the husband that forgot to shave says baby I tried to look nice for you what do you think. Don't go saying you forgot to save, look at him and find something you do like. Like he is wearing you favorite jeans on him something. and complement on that.
Stop your self from thinking negative thoughts about your spouse. If you find your self doing this stop and then find something you love about them in stead to think on.
(2) Lack of time with each other This you can see a mile away and know if you spend no time together.
How to spot - Do you work days and he works night? Do you have kids and a 1,000 things to do everyday? Do you always work late or go to bed early?
How to fix - Have a date night every week. Even if you can not find a baby sitter then have a date at home. This is one thing I hold firm to. Date nights help reintroduce each other, talk about the week, and get to know each other. don't think you know everything there is to know even after 20 years. It also lets you fall back in love with each other, or keep that spark alive.
Put the kids to bed early - If you have younger kids try to get them in bed by 8pm. Then you two watch TV, play a game, or watch a movie together. Even just talk.
Support each others interest - If you like gaming have time gaming together, if one likes camping go on a camping trip. watch sports together whatever it might be.
Family night - Have family night with kids and your spouse. play games, go bowling what ever. Have a night every week to spend all together as a family. our is Monday night. This not only lets you bond with your spouse but keeps you on track with whats going on with your kids.
(3) Lack of sexual desire for one another - This is a big one. Sex or making love in a marriage is so important. Sex in a marriage reinforces, love self esteem, and the feeling of being wanted and needed. Couples that have a healthy sex life fight less, have less of a chance of cheating and stay together longer then does who do not.
How to fix Do something different. - This depends on you and your spouse how different you want to go. But you can act out each other fantasy, dress up, role play, bring in toys, a new lube, you name it the sky is the limit here.
Touch each other without the thought of sex- Not every cuddle, a soft touch is about sex. This is most of all for woman. Woman need to feel that they are loved not just sex toys.
Don't take it personally - If you husband is to tried one night or your wife does not feel good. Don't think it is you. 99% of the time it is not.
Work on it together and try to make love 1-3 times a week if not more. This alone will help your marriage. There are several more red flags but by starting to work just on these three will bring you closer together.
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