Tips for dating as a single mother
Dating as a single mother
As a parent in general, your focus falls on your children - what is best for them, are they seen to, are they provided for, are they happy, etc. We concentrate our attention on making sure that they have the best in every possible way. Parenting is a full-time job and even when you're physically not doing anything; your mind is still parenting as it thinks about the future and how to best see to your child's needs.
Single parenting can be ten times harder. When a parent in a relationship, you have the support of your significant other (hopefully). Usually you both understand that the children require attention and make time for each other in the quiet periods in between. As a single parent, although you have the love and motivation in the form of your little one; at times you may still feel like something is missing and crave that attention, affection and support in the form of a romantic relationship.
Dating as a single parent has a lot of concerns and stresses. There are numerous things single mothers think about and worry about when taking the step back into the dating world.
When to inform your partner of your child
Immediately. It is just that simple.
If you are interacting with or have your eye on someone who you think might be put off by the idea that you have a child or that you need to keep your child a secret from for any period of time - then as a single mother you are interested in the wrong person. To the right person, having a child will make no difference at all.
In addition to this, a relationship should not have any amount of secrecy or lies. Starting a relationship off with secrets is very likely not to end well.
What is the hardest part of dating as a single mom?
When to introduce your child
If you introduce your child to your partner during the early stages of your relationship, you are able to monitor your partners interaction and see whether or not he makes an effort in getting to know your child. If your child is a little older you can also judge your child's feelings about the person as children do have their own intuitive instincts. Another advantage is that you are able to spend time with your partner and your child without sacrificing time with your child to be with your partner.
An additional reason why this might be a good idea is the fact that if you choose to have a relationship with this person, they will inevitably need to have a relationship with your child. Starting the bonding process and monitoring whether or not your partner is ready to have a child in their lives is important. Again, the last thing you want is to discover after 6 months or a year that your partner does not want to be a part of your child's life, is not interested in your child or ready for such a commitment.
Regardless of whether or not you choose to have your partner introduced to your child at an early stage, or a later one - you should never keep your child a secret from your partner for any length of time. You do not want to tell your partner you have a child after a few months and then face rejection if he wasn't expecting it or not willing to be in a relationship with a single parent.
Be upfront and tell your partner from the get go - it always works out best this way.
Is Online dating a good idea for single parents?
Many people find online dating as one of the best ways to meet people or start relationships for single parents.
Below are some of the reasons why:
- You can be a little more open
Many people find it easier to "bare it all' via text verses in person. ASomwtimes it's easier to say things you would usually ne a little shy to say in person to someone over the phone or via text. You can also think things out clearly before putting them down instead of fumbling over your words in person if you were nervous.
- Find similarities
When looking through peoples online profiles (if they are being honest), you are able to choose people with similar likes or dislikes. On condition you have this in your profile, you will also be conversating with people who already know that you are a parent and that your child is of high importance to you illiminating one more thing you wuill need to inform a propspective partner of.
- Build an emotional connection
Sometimes forming an emotional connection first is a whole lot better than a physical one. You get to know someone on a personal level and form more of a friendshi[ allowing you to decide whether or not your personalities match before meeting with them. It also illiminates the idea of numerous first dates with no second dates due to a first date discovery that you have nothing in common or don't get along well enough.
- Sort through time wasters
By being able to make it clear that you are not in search of a fling or one night stand, you can cut out a large number of time wasters or players (again this hoping that they are honest with you)
- Convenience: It allows you to meet people easier
You don't need to leave your house or drop your kids off at a babysitter to have a chat with someone new or introduce yourself to a good-looking stranger. The biggest advantage is that you can chat to other people while being with your kids, doing something fun with them or bonding with them. You do not have to leave the comfort of your home or sacrifice time with your children.
The most important thing to remember when dating as a single mother is TO ALWAYS PUT YOUR CHILD / CHILDREN FIRST NO MATTER WHAT!
An awesome movie for ANY SINGLE MOM!
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