6 Things to Be a Good Father
A father role is so vital. It includes supporting and respecting the mother and sharing in child-rearing tasks. It also requires spending time reading to and talking with the children. This fills a vital emotional need of children.Being a good father is a fulfillment of oneself that has a huge responsibility.
The word "father" is not simply mean being a 'father to a child', but also a father that supports, uplift and inspire to make the family success and happy.
6 Things to be a Good Father
- Know them well-as a father,you should know your children well, how? The best way to capture the heart of your children is to talk to them always, see their actions as well as their ability to think on a certain task or problems they may encountered, their priorities and interest.
- Show love and affection- the most important thing you can show your love to your children is to help them know about God,because knowing God and His commandments lead them to a better person.
- Continues Guidance- being a father is a lifetime commitment. Guide them to make a good decision especially on their teenage life, because it is the crucial part of their life. Children recognize the value of a complete family even on a simple way of gathering like eating meals at home. It also help them to avoid bad eating habits,giving them emotional security of warm, loving family environment. Research published by the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, The Toronto Star said that when fathers eat meals with their children, go on outings with them, and help with their homework, there are “fewer behaviour problems, higher levels of sociability and a higher level of school performance among children and adolescents.” Joshua, a 16- year-old student from the Philippines recalls, ''my father made a great effort to return home from work just to eat with us, and a lot of things was talk about, problem solve, a good humor ,laughter and advice often present''.
- Good Communicators- a good father is someone who's good communicator if he is a good listener. You must be careful listener to your children, listen calmly, not overreact to the things they may say to you but rather show interest to them, in return, they will share their thoughts or problems with you. If a children think that you are not judgemental or never lose temper quickly, they will express their feelings too. Jacques, a father who lives in France, sometimes found it difficult to communicate with his son, Jérôme. But instead of forcing his son to talk, he adapted his approach—he played soccer with him. “After our physical exercise,” says Jacques, “we used to sit on the grass and rest a bit. My son often opened his heart at that time. The simple fact that we were together and, I think, that he had me to himself during these times, created a special bond between us. Spending time with your children sets a good example.They will imitate your efforts once they grown up and apply this things that will also benefit to them.Yet, if you do not spend a significant time to your children, they will conclude that your work or hobbies is more important than them.
- Give Loving Commendations Commendations to our children enriches their character and build confidence on them, that will motivate them to never give up on something, trying hard until succeed, for when they were acknowledged and appreciated, children blossom! Luke, regularly works with his 15-year-old son, Manuel, as they do household chores. “Sometimes,” says Luca, “I tell Manuel to start a task by himself and that I will help him if he needs me. Most of the time, he manages the job on his own. His successes give him satisfaction and boost his self-confidence. When he succeeds, I commend him. When he doesn’t do as well as he hoped, I still let him know that I appreciate his effort.”
How Father Nourish His Children
- Father's Love -always find ways to express your love to your children, not only by telling them that you love them but also by showing interest to them. A father should make a point of looking opportunities to commend their children not overly critical, constantly correcting them but rather make sure to them that they know that they have your approval on the things they do as long as it is right and good for them, these will help your children to have a healthy sense of self-worth.
- Happy Environment- study shows that children that engage into delinquent acts is a result of unhappy family.Thus, a father, who is the head of the family should make sure that his children has a happy environment, he must give time to play with their children, constantly talking to them, bond and visits enjoyable places or even biking together as a way of exercising. Research shows that when fathers play with their young children, they encourage them to be more adventurous and bold.
- Positive Example- children often look up to his father especially to a boy, they imitate what his father do. For example, 'if a father treat his wife accordingly with dignity and respect, his son may well grown up treating women with dignity and respect also.They become a better person.Clearly, setting a fine example—in both word and deed—is vital to being a good father.So, remember, it is not only what you say that matters; it is particularly what you do—the example you set.
- Impost Discipline- some parents discipline their children harshly, it involves treatment like, belittling, insults, severe beatings. But, if you are a loving father, you should discipline your children in love, punish them accordingly, making it clear to them that your motive in correcting them was your love for them.
- To Be Protected- as a father, you should be wise enough to shield your children from unwholesome influences and potentially harmful associates. Be alert to dangers, anticipate situation that could lead to problems. For example of which is allowing our children to use internet carelessly, without proper advise on how to be wise in using internet, you should impose rules,on how they gonna use it, like school research, and when they will use it, of what time, make sure that the computer is keep in an open area to monitor the use of it if is use in wholesome way.
- Taught Spiritual Values- a father is responsible in educating his children morally and spiritually. He is responsible to inculcate right principles into their hearts. A responsible father always sought to talk to his children about God wherever they were and whatever they doing.
A family that eats together stays together
Absent Father Impact
According to Fathers Incorporated.com there are some problems that may occur when a father is not around.Some of these facts are as follows:
- 24 million children in America – one out of three – live in homes without biological fathers
- A child with a nonresident father is 54 percent more likely to be poorer than his or her father
- Fatherless children are twice as likely to drop out of school
- Kindergarteners who live with single parents are over-represented among those lagging socially, emotionally and cognitively and also tend to have more health issues. Thirty-three percent of children who were behind in all three areas were living with single parents, while only 22% were not lagging behind.
- A study of 13,986 imprisoned women showed that more than half of them grew up without their father. Forty-two percent grew up in a single-mother household, and 16 percent lived with neither parent.
- Children growing up without fathers are at a far greater risk of child abuse:
- A 77 percent greater risk of being physically abused
- An 87 percent greater risk of being harmed by physical neglect
- A 165 percent greater risk of experiencing notable physical neglect
- A 74 percent greater risk of suffering from emotional neglect
- An 80% greater risk of suffering serious injury as a result of abuse
And overall, they are at a 120 percent greater risk of being endangered by some type of child abuse.The absence of fathers is a worldwide problem.
In Brazil a 2000 census report revealed that the number of families headed by women was 11.2 million out of a total of 44.7 million. In Nicaragua, 25 percent of children lived with their mothers only. In Costa Rica the number of children not recognized by their own fathers rose during the 1990’s from 21.1 percent to 30.4 percent.
Being a man or a father is not just carrying yourself in masculine way but also, you are willing to work hard, control your emotions and take responsibility of your actions! Our children is God's gift, that is why, we should cherish every moment with them so as to make them a better person in the future, help them achieve their goals that something you can be proud of.