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Trust In a Relationship

Updated on September 9, 2013
Losing trust
Losing trust

Lack Of Trust In a Relationship

Trust is one of the most important ingredients and the foundation of a successful relationship. Lack of it can cause serious problems and is actually the most common reason why relationships end.

Trust is something that must be earned and maintained with action, not just words. Without it relationship is like a house without a foundation - shaky at best.

How To Fix a Broken Relationship

Most relationships can be saved, but for that you need patience, time, willingness to change and a good strategy.

There are a few practical step-by-step guides out there that can help you tremendously.

If you need tips on how to deal with a break up, visit

Rebuilding Trust In a Relationship

Rebuilding trust can be difficult. In practical sense trust means that you place confidence in someone to be honest with you, to keep promises, to not take advantage of you, to not lie, cheat or steal from you. It's the glue of the relationship. To lose it usually means a lot of pain, confusion, anger, and sadness.

If you lose trust, you will put a question mark in front of everything your partner says or does. And vice versa. So what do we do if we don't want to end the relationship? How do we earn trust and be trustful again?

Here are some suggestions:

  • Be honest
  • Take responsibility for your own actions and decisions
  • Talk, communicate, listen. Unaswered questions and doubts can linger on for years
  • Say what you are going to do and do what you say
  • Give trust back
  • Let go of the past. Learn to stop draging the past into the present
  • Give it time, don't expect an overnight change

Rebuilding trust will take time, it won't happen over night. But investing in strengthening and maintaining your relationship will result in mutual respect and connectedness built on the foundation of trust. So it's worth it.

All you need is honesty, love, forgiveness, patience, commitment and a lot of time. No one said it's gonna be easy.


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    • profile image

      Beseg 5 years ago

      Most of us who read this article probably looked it up. I did at least. and that just shows that someone is willing to change. This article definitely helped.

    • 100ktrainer profile image

      100ktrainer 6 years ago from Michigan

      Losing trust is always hard. However, with time and patience you can rebuild it. It takes 2 people working together and communicating often. It's never an easy road to travel, but can be done if 2 people are willig to try to make it work.

      Great article.

    • profile image

      Jasmin Notkin 6 years ago

      I don't have alot to say , because I got same problem here like a few other girls here! I just got so hurt in my last marriage and betrayed ! I'm in a new marriage and I know he is treatin me better than anybodyelse ever could! But we r always separated , he is in the army and I'm German citizen and still in germany till papers got done! It's horrible I hate it it kills me and I'm always accusin him on cheating on me which ruins everything! He is still patient but im just so afraid to loose him!!!

    • profile image

      tess 6 years ago

      My boyfriend wants to break up our relationship. I love him and i don't wanna end our relationship. He thinks that i cheat on him...which never happened...i explained everything honestly but he don't seem to believe do i gain his trust back?please help...

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      tryingtotrust 7 years ago

      My husband had an affair about 2 years ago and I am still finding it hard to trust him. There are still many unanswered questions and when I bring it up he gets angry and defensive. It's not fair that he was able to move on so quickly from his deceptive actions. How can I do the same?

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      Wellness Rx 7 years ago

      If we no longer trust in a relationship it does extend to other aspects of our lives. It's not always what we think that destroys trust and it does happen outside of "marital relationships." Being "taken for granted, lied to, stolen from..." I think it's also important not to trust people too easily. People change and maybe it means we will have to change too. I guess it's possible that a relationship can survive such a lack of trust on the other hand maybe these "eye-openers" are important in and of themselves. If someone doesn't wish to respect you maybe you need to move on. There is no point vesting yourself in a loser. What does winning mean? Finally, maybe you aren't losing anything if they can't see the importance of losing your trust. How long are you willing to live in an "isolated" state? Do you really want to know someone when you find they're not who you thought they were, you can't trust them.

    • profile image

      kayla 8 years ago

      any one plz help me learn more i am in relationship that i have been in for 1year but i still dont trust him how do i?? I have been hurt so many times. I dont want to lose him b/c i dont know how to trust. Any ideas of what i can do plz email me at thank you