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What is "True Love"?

Updated on March 11, 2013

Is a sloppy kiss a good kiss?

What an excellent question to pose: "True Love" versus "Unconditional Love". This begs for a distinction. You can't just put a messy kiss on the subject and say: "Well a sloppy kiss is a good kiss because the intention is so grand."

My Chihuahua's Unconditional Love

Simplistically stated, what a dog does for you is "unconditional love". At least that's what people say. At least "unconditional" seems to indicate a universally appreciated receipt of love, from which the getter can't figure out why the giver is doing it. Actually dogs do want you to feed them, give them a nice bed, protect them from cold and calamity. So, in fact dogs are conditional. They will always seem to be appreciative of the least little thing you do, but I don't think it is really unconditional.

First Responder Love

However the issue deserves sincere treatment above and beyond the "loving pet" realm. When a first responder saves a life, you can say that was "unconditional". A freely offered token for food, a help up a curb, a freely offered smile. Salvation in all of its forms is "unconditional". All of those things seem to have an anonymity about them. Plainly thinking about the topic, it simply means "I don't remember having to do anything to acquire this love." "Unconditional" really is a statement about "conditionality".

Future Transactions in "Free Love"?

Love is really transactional. Don't tend to your loved ones, and see how quickly you find out about the transactional aspect of your love relationships. When a man's fantasies come true. Forgive me for addressing this, but it bears on the topic. When a woman who you know little throws herself at you physically, the transactional aspect immediately comes to mind. BUT it comes in the form of a possible future obligation. What will be required of me in the future for this "free love".

The Heart and the Soul of it

And this takes us naturally to "True Love". When love is true, there is not a hidden agenda. When you get and give, and the other gets and gives and there is a purity about the offering of the self and the time, and the soul of it, and the heart of it, and there is no unclear element to the love, then it is true.

Is it immortal? No. Is it without any possibility of termination? No. But at this time, at this moment, the giving and the taking has a purity about it. The free flowing nature of love, when it flows and grows in abundance and makes the individuals freer and stronger and benefited; then the love is true.

Unconditionality has very little to do with true love. And so, as I answer this, I see that there is less in common about these two kinds of love than I originally felt. I do know that there is a trueness to unconditionality. But not necessarily an unconditionality about true love.

I truly submit this as an unconditional offering from my heart. But I truly hope that you find a benefit in its offering.


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