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- Advice & Tips for Women in Relationships
Understanding the Female Mind
Have you ever wondered why you keep meeting guys that are stupidly selfish? Have you wondered after many attempts for relationships that have failed what you did wrong? Are you becoming so bitter from being hurt that you want to give up on finding love completely? FEAR NO MORE! This blog is for females that want answers to the questions stated above. I have done extreme research over this past week in understanding the mind. I outlined some really good points relating to the female mind. So this not one of my usual blogs where i'm speaking directly from my feelings and knowledge. I'm speaking from what I have learned directly from the books i have been reading. This blog will also skim on interpretation but you will get some overall answers that will help you understand what is going on in your mind when it comes to finding love and relationships.
Past, Present, Future
To understand why we choose the men we do, we must first go back to the past. We can't move forward to the future without understanding our past. Now their is a popular saying if you lay with dogs, you get flees, then you get bit, it will hurt and make you sick. Okay so ask yourself what was your father like? If you didn't have your dad to much in your life ask yourself what was the first guy that made you feel loved? Okay now look at the first guy you ever dated. Compare. The point of this is because typically women look for qualities in men that they have seen before! We look for qualities that we can identify with that relates to the very first male that made us feel loved. Even the bad qualities we may over look them because we have seen them before and know the possible outcome. Now lets switch gears to the percentage of women who had a good male role model since the beginning. So why are you picking bad men? Well the saying goes opposites attract. The reason you maybe seeking those kind of men is because if you lived a safe life, barely took risks, had a good family, studied in the books, you look for action in the one part of your life that is unpredictable. Relationships. What attracts you is the guy who has the look of being a risk taker but can blend in if need be. Now let's go to the present knowing what we know. SO HOW DO YOU CHANGE IT? It's never going to be a quick fix, yes people will say why don't you just change the type of men you go for. If it was only that simple. Let me start with one important factor that prevents this from happening instantly. What your brain waves give out when you see men.
What I mean is, your vibe, (this is just an example by the way) when you walk into a room you may see the guy who is sitting quietly reading investors daily who looks up and sees you. Your brain instantly either says yes or no. Since he typically isn't the guy your use to dating your brain says no and send message to him through your eyes and body language that your not interested in him. It happens in seconds. Men are wonderful readers of what is in a female's eyes and body language when she looks his way. They have to be or they wouldn't ever have the confidence to come up to us. So next, you see the guy with the skull shirt on waiting on a beer. His eyes lock with yours, and gives you that shiver or butterflies in your belly. Identify ladies, that feeling is your body and mind saying we know this guy. That is the instant attraction you feel, your body thinks he is so hot because your brain knows what he wants. That little smile you do before you look away lets him know its on. Why is he so attractive you wonder? You know he is obviously good in bed because you have dated enough to know. The ladies that haven't dated enough to know the reason he is so attractive is because your mind places him in those group of guys that your father/mother wouldn't approve of. WHICH MAKES HIM SO HOT. So how can you reverse this you maybe asking? Well you have identify what makes these guys so attractive. Then keep in mind if you lay with dogs you get flees. Remember how your always complaining that you want a good man? So stop going for the jerk that's going to break your heart in the end. Trust your judgement he is not worth it. Yes there is the slim chance he may change but why would you want to go through all that headache? Think he is a plague or a disease that will infect your brain and spread to your heart. You won't see it at first but slowly the pain will come in degrees.
Love to be loved
Now when you see that guy that doesn't rev you up immediately give him a smile. I'm not saying that he isn't a jerk but you have way better chances on the guy sitting by himself reading, peeking looks at you, then the guy who is scanning the room looking for the women most easy for him to spit game too. When you go out to the bar don't excessively drink, this will attract all the slim ball men who aren't going to help you, they will just bed you. So be careful, your mind is the strongest tool we have as human beings. When your mind is looking for a set of guys that are not good then your body will follow and heart break will follow. Yes, yes, we know they might change but who has time to mother them to grow up? When you can get a man who is ready to give you all you want and need. Their is one thing i like to add, some guys are shy just like us. So if he doesn't come up to you but just sneaks looks at you, go for it. What's the worst he is going to say? Seriously. Now here is a little personal tip from me. The books will never say this but i will. I'm not saying that these jerks don't have their uses, if your not ready to look for the right man yet and want to have some nookie well they are perfect. Plus you could increase your sexual skills, how to tell what you like and want done in the bedroom. Just keep your heart out of the picture at all costs, if its getting to serious, cut it off and find another. Or quit the game. I'm not saying go sleep with all the jerks you can find, just get want you need and quit. ALWAYS USE PROTECTION. You don't want have his baby heaven forbid. If your really looking for the one then find him. He is out there probably closer then you think. So love and be loved when you find him. Don't take him for granted either, remember what it is like to be hurt and remember he is rare. ;)