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What your man wants

Updated on June 11, 2012

Believe it or not ladies, sometimes we men can be very emotional, more that you all can guess. We tend to not showing it just because of our ego, trust me. In relationships, expectations, grievances, desires and emotions… all arise from our side too… you need to see them sometimes.

A very exponential factor in break-ups is the lack of understanding. Being the man in a committed relationship for three years let me tell you some basics you need to keep an eye on. No offence to the ladies, I think this will help in maintaining a healthy relationship with your beloved.

1. He takes you for granted sometimes because he knows you won’t leave him ever.

Sometimes he won’t return your calls and messages. He might be busy, stuck somewhere. Don’t panic… he loves you… and he thinks you will understand.

2. Sometimes he is silent and doesn’t speak much. This does not mean that he is bored of you.

Not all the years of a relationship can be the butterfly phases when both of you have wings to fly together. Things move on and so does a relation. Sometimes he might have a lot on his mind and remains silent. This in no way means he does not want to break up with you or has lost his interest.

3. He needs to feel that you feel secure with and about us.

Tell him sometimes how nice you fell around him, how protected you fell with him. He likes being the man…make him feel like that.

4. Sometimes he has the right to get angry and expects an apology.

He has emotions doesn’t he. They can get overwhelming sometimes and he may shout at you. You have every right to feel bad. Just once try and give him an apology. I bet immediately he will give you ten of them himself. Both of you will feel great after that. Trust me.

5. Sometimes, he needs a little pampering.

You like getting pampered don’t you? He likes some of it too. Try pampering him on his birthday or any small occasion…see the magic it creates and the smile on his face will light your heart up.

6. He likes pampering you, but sometimes it gets too much and gets agitated.

Had a fight with him, you got angry. You are not responding to his sweet pampering messages for a day. He does the same pampering the next day. You feel nice about that but you want more. Trust me, the moment you feel nice… talk to him and sort everything. Sometimes your greed may give him the wrong picture.

7. Sometimes try to accommodate the problems of his workspace.

He might have had a rough day at work, a hectic day and is tired. Don’t take it the wrong way then. Helping him would make you feel nice rather than thinking that he has lost interest in you, which he has not.

8. Some of his friends are family to him, try to accept them.

Not all his friends are bad! C’mon… you can try liking a few of them. Who knows even you might gain a wonderful friend.

9. He might need some free space or some alone time at regular intervals. That does not mean he has lost interest in you.

We men sometimes take a lot of pressure, may it be work, office, home, family etcetera etcetera. That’s why we try and be alone for some times to ease off. This doesn’t mean that you don’t support him right. It’s just in our nature. Spare us….!

10. He needs just one smile from you to let it all go away.


Trust me! My relation was in a mess. I didn’t want it to end, I love her a lot. One day I sat with her and discussed these problems and she discussed hers and since then my relation has improved, fights have reduced and both of us are happier than ever.

Only a few things matter when it comes to successful relationships. Be impractical, it’s nice to be so. But sometimes a little practical approach can help save hearts from shattering. In the end, love always triumphs over everything.

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    • profile image

      rituraj sharad 5 years ago

      indeed a secret to the treasure of love in a mans chest..

    • shalini sharan profile image

      shalini sharan 5 years ago from Delhi

      very right points dear

    • iamageniuster profile image

      iamageniuster 5 years ago

      This is true, I can vouch for that.

    • Deborah Brooks profile image

      Deborah Brooks Langford 5 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      wow.. everyone that is in a relationship should read this it is a great hub.. I am sharing..

      Keep up the great writing my friend

      Debbie

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks Debbie! Glad you liked my work!

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 5 years ago from South Africa

      Excellent!

      I believe women should give what they would like to receive and hopefully their hopes will not be dashed.

      Voted up, informative and insightful.

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      thanks Martie.... yea... we can be d**k headed sometimes... buts thats we we are not complete without you guys... It time some of them knew that :)

    • barbergirl28 profile image

      Stacy Harris 5 years ago from Hemet, Ca

      This was a great article. I know as a woman, sometimes we really need to hear these things from a male perspective. Yes - I get that men are humans and they have emotions and feelings, but sometimes it is difficult to relate to them.

      Great hub and great information. A real eye opener. I will definately use this information to improve the relationship with my husband!

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Stacy! Thanks for stopping by! Your comments are much appreciated! Some times we men can be very dumb... please understand it to be solely our dumbness and nothing else :)

    • ananceleste profile image

      Anan Celeste 5 years ago from California

      Rahul this is pure GOLD!!

      Coming from a guy is even better. I have been with my husband more than half of my life,( since I was 15) and after 20 years with him, I can vouch for that vulnerable side. Knowing that, I learned to see him in a whole different light and love him for it. I know dozens of women that don't take the time to discover that side of their partners. Great Hub! Sharing!!!!

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks Anan for such a lovely comment! We sometimes are gravely misunderstood!

      You have a blessed and strong life with your hubby! All the love and luck

      Rahul:)

    • Anjili profile image

      Anjili 5 years ago from planet earth, a humanoid

      Thanks for letting the cat out of the basket. I hope they will understand us better. Awesome hub and voted up too.

    • TToombs08 profile image

      Terrye Toombs 5 years ago from Somewhere between Heaven and Hell without a road map.

      The complexities of a man explained in the simplest of terms. love it! Votedup and across.

    • profile image

      lovedoctor926 5 years ago

      This is very good advice coming from a guy.

    • JessMcCray profile image

      JessMcCray 5 years ago from NYC

      That was an awesome read. My husband has told me the same stuff but hearing it from another man makes me realize just how true it is. Thank you!

    • SanneL profile image

      SanneL 5 years ago from Sweden

      I believe we should treat our men the same way we want them to treat us. . . Wonderful hub with great advice. Voted up, useful and shared.

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks for stopping by and leaving a wonderful comment Anjili:)

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks Toombs! Your kind comments are always appreciated :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks for the kind words love :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Jess! I think your husband and I would make best of friends :)

      Thank you for stopping by and sharing your views :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Sannel! Thank you for the words of wisdom! You are very correct :)

    • profile image

      ganga 5 years ago

      hy nice gud job

    • profile image

      ganga 5 years ago

      hy nice gud job

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thank you Ganga!

    • Ruchira profile image

      Ruchira 5 years ago from United States

      boy...it usually takes men YEARS to become wise. You are so young :))

      good advise :) voted up as useful.

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks Ruchira for the kind words! I have loads to learn from you all :)

    • D.Juris Stetser profile image

      D.Juris Stetser 5 years ago from South Dakota

      Love this rahul. we ladies need all the help we can get, when it comes to understanding men. Especially like your insight in situations men seem remote or distant and we automatically it's 'US' somethings's wrong-panic time, and it's usually totally different, work, or something in the 'man world'. you put it all so well! Thanks. dotti

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Dotti! So nice to see you! We men are are often gravely misunderstood! Not everyone is like you... with such an insight on how we feel... Our silence is many a times taken wrong... It should not be!

      Thank you so much for stopping by:)

    • scrittobene profile image

      Maria D'Alessandro 5 years ago from Melbourne Australia

      Thanks for the enlightenment rahul into the world of the male psyche. A must read for all women.

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thank you Maria! I really think we need to looked over... a bit closely

    • theastrology profile image

      theastrology 5 years ago from New Delhi

      Such valuable information for all girls. We will be very lucky If they can understand us.

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Indeed Sanjeev! indeed!

      Thank you for stopping by!

    • suzettenaples profile image

      Suzette Walker 4 years ago from Taos, NM

      And always communicate-this is important. See, you sat down and both of you talked and you sorted things out! This is a great article! I enjoyed hearing the male perspective on relationships. Very interesting and informative!

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Suzettenaples! Communication is always so important! Thanks for stopping by adn leaving such insightful comments

    • gmmurgirl profile image

      Geisha M 4 years ago from Pilipinas

      Wow! Very detailed and right on point! I can fully understand a man's concern and this is very accurate. Thanks Rahul!

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Gmmurgirl! I am glad you found this useful!

      Your kind comments and visit are humbly welcome

    • Sunshine625 profile image

      Linda Bilyeu 4 years ago from Orlando, FL

      Good tips Rahul. I'll do my best to follow them. Maybe:)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      hehe.. thanks Linda

    • BRIAN SLATER profile image

      Brian Slater 4 years ago from Nottingham Uk

      Great information here and it is nice to see a mans' point of view which you have conveyed very well. Voted up.

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks Brian! Much Appreciated

    • Angela Brummer profile image

      Angela Brummer 4 years ago from Lincoln, Nebraska

      Awh this is great!

    • tammyswallow profile image

      Tammy 4 years ago from North Carolina

      Great advice and insight into the mind of a man. Sharing!

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks Angela!

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      We have no mind when It comes to women Tammy.. It is all upto you guyzz

    • Angelme566 profile image

      Angelme566 4 years ago

      Hahaha..Dost ,i can so much relate with this , like all my questions are answered now.. As i read each number a smile it gave to my face.. I love this hub ! You are brilliant :)

      Voted all !

    • CrazedNovelist profile image

      A.E. Williams 4 years ago from Hampton, GA

      Good topic. A lot of people can relate to this! :)

    • uzma shaheen profile image

      Uzma Shaheen Bhatti 4 years ago from Lahore,Pakistan

      indeed an excellent hub from a male percpective, we women need to understand that.good work.

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Oh am Glad I answered your questions Dost! thanks for connecting

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks Aubrey! i am glad you liked it:)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      You are right Uzma... thank you

    • harinarayan profile image

      harinarayan 4 years ago from Kerala, India

      very correct!!!voted

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 4 years ago from New York

      Looks like you should be interviewing for "Dear Abby" (newspaper advice columnist here in the States). Your age belies your experience. Your hub is interesting and educational. So many women need to learn to practice what they preach and you have pointed that out from a man's point of view. Well done my friend.

      Voted up and interesting.

    • Daughter Of Maat profile image

      Melissa Flagg 4 years ago from Rural Central Florida

      This is so true. Men may not always show it, but they are more like us women than they care to admit. Some relationships have a natural way of communication, meaning those two people can communicate not only verbally, but with their body language which is how they avoid arguments. My hubby and I are quite guilty of that. I don't think we've had an argument in 6.5 years. But other relationships need a bit more work, and these are PERFECT tips those relationships!

      Great job, as always Rahul! Voted up and shared!

    • Dr Pooja profile image

      Dr Pooja 4 years ago

      Agree with Daughter of Maat and others,Great work as usual.Like the honesty with which you expressed the male's view point .

    • Amethystraven profile image

      Amethystraven 4 years ago from California

      Great hub!!! Men that are not afraid to admit and show their emotions are my favorite. They show them in different ways. A man really shows his strength and confidence when he is not afraid to admit he has feelings and act upon them. Openness and confidence are very attractive personality traits in a man.

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thank you so much Hari.. much appreciated

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Mary! I am humbled to have your kindness ushered on me like this! Thank you so much

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      You are right Melissa! Now I am so glad to hear that you people have not had an argument... great going... awesome!!

      We certainly need to be more clear... but on the general front we are dumb.. to be honest :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Pooja! Thank you for the kindness

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Ameth! I agree with you but I am afraid most of us are not like that.. so we are weak ... and need women to come out for us as heroes :D

    • Amethystraven profile image

      Amethystraven 4 years ago from California

      I feel some media's provide influential perceptions for people in regards to how they should behave. I've always wondered how people would behave without the influence of fictional media. Media teaches men and women they should behave a certain way. When men show feelings and reveal how sensitive they are to something someone did, and they cry or show disappointment, they are ridiculed and put down. To ridicule and put down someone for showing their natural reaction to something is lack of understanding. I believe some men battle with who they are and who the media says they are and what they should show. In romantic or platonic relationships, effort and understanding are a huge part of getting along. Growth and a strong bond form between people when effort, acknowledgement and accountability are practiced. Heroism has to be equal for the relationship to grow.

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      I agree with you Ame... Media over the centuries in its various forms ( social, religious and more) has portrayed the masculine nature of man depicting strength in the silence and isolation of his thoughts...

      Media has a large effect on both sexes and its effects encompass almost all the aspects involved.

      Communication ( both way) is the most important feature of a couple... a healthy couple and must not be compromised

    • Silver Q profile image

      Silver Q 4 years ago

      Very nice points! Some times, because of gender differences, we fail to communicate with one another what we truly feel and want. It's nice to have a list such as this one handy at all times!

      Thanks!

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks Silverq... and nice to meet you...

      SOrry for the late reply....

      Thanks for the kind comment and visit

    • Rich11 profile image

      Richa 2 years ago

      Great hub...girls also would like to get help to understand their men...this hub is really helping and rational..i like every word of it .....very true and helpful Indeed

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 2 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      I am glad you found it helpful Rich

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