- Gender and Relationships
When Is Rape OK??? Viral Facebook Post!
Is Rape Ever OK?
Many people via social media, particularly Facebook are posting and re-posting a poll that was taken among teens in regard to rape. The title of the Poll reads "When Is Rape Okay?" However, looking deeper, particularly into the actual question asked among the teens, the question actually asks; "Is is all right if a male holds a female down and physically forces her to have sex if..."
Following the unfinished question are choices given in which percentages are put towards the answers from both male and female students. The Questionnaire itself stems from an alleged 1978 survey of high school students administered by a Jacqueline Goodchilds. Some of the conditions to the proposed question include;
- she gets him excited sexually?
- she lets him touch her above the waist?
- they have dated for a long time?
Many comments on the poll contain remarks of dismay, disbelief and shock. Perhaps largely due to the percentage of responses that seem to 'OK' such a heinous act. For instance, as the figure displays, a high percentage of female students(42%) agree that if she gets her male counterpart excited, then it is OK for him to force himself upon her for sex.
Most people on Facebook and other forums are responding with emotions instead of rationale. For instance, the rational thinking person will clearly see that the test is somewhat bias in that it doesn't give a choice for 'rape not being ok'. Furthermore, the survey doesn't really ask if rape is ok. Instead, it asks if it is ok for a male to force himself upon a female given certain conditions. This is a very different question, and here's the proof.
Rape is a very heartbreaking, hurtful, morally wrong and criminal act. According to the definition of rape via dictionary.com; rape is any act of sexual intercourse that is forced upon a person. But wait a minute, to grant perspective in perhaps playing devil's advocate, let's take a closer look at this meaning.
Some people choose to have what is called 'rough sex', or 'kinky sex'. Some couples choose to, in order to spice things up a bit, engage in role play, where one of the more typical scenes involve the male counterpart engaging in a very aggressive and forceful act that leads to the sexual encounter. Does this constitute as rape? Some may say no because the women is actually in compliance and accepting of the gesture ultimately. Well, so are the female students in this case. At least the 42% that agree that if she arouses him sexually, then he is ok to force himself upon her in a sexual encounter. Many women have even agreed that they like a man to 'take control' and have even admitted to fantasizing about a man just forcing himself upon her, throwing her against a wall and/or having his way with her. The fine line here is willingness and unwillingness. So perhaps it is safe to say that if she is willing to be forced upon, then it isn't rape anymore.......or is it? The question then may not be; "Is rape ever ok?", but instead; "when is rape actually rape?"
These astonishing statistics have many people placing blame in all sorts of areas, and deriving excuses for the results. However, the fact remains that the numbers show what they show. Whether or not it is agreed upon really isn't the issue. Instead, the real issue may be on how to educate youngsters more on sex and the okays and not okays in which is entailed in the act. Sex among teens have been around for ages, so there is basically no denying it nor ignoring it. It is up to rational adults to hit the subject head on and offer tools of advice, knowledge and wisdom about the natural thing that is sex. These same rational adults must also not look at such results in disgust, but instead take such vital information and use it as a learning tool, for both adult and adolescents.
For Further assessment, see part II of this article: When Is Rape OK? Part II-What Does The Bible Say?