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When a Woman Hopelessly Loves a Man...

Updated on June 30, 2014

You heard me right, hopelessly. Some men like it, some don’t.

Let's get things straight. As guys, we have all been there! There is always a point in our lives when we discover that a girl has fallen so deeply in love with us. Call it crush, call is obsession, and you are right.

Surprisingly, most men who have experienced this do not always enjoy it as much as you would think. In fact, most often, guys get panicky, when this happens.

Granted they may enjoy it at first, with all those caring and loving attention he’s getting from the girl but trust me, it doesn’t last.


Search me!

Well, I can't say for sure. One thing I know, most guys cannot cope or wish to cope with such situations. Some guys feel that when the girl is so much in love with them, it signifies the end of their own ‘freedom’.

One obvious reason why this is so is usually because when a girl is painfully or hopelessly in love, most likely, she will start displaying all those behaviors that will instead of making the guy feel more comfortable and confident and carefree, makes him to be so scared and so wary and of course less confident of himself.

In fact, most guys starts feeling claustrophobic when such attention persists. I guess, maybe, something to do with guys being careful with what you wish for 'cause you might just get it and when you get it, you might not have any idea what you are going to do it.

But it is not supposed to be that way.

Speaking for myself, one thing I have always convinced myself and I so much strongly believe in is that what most guys out there really want is a girl who will love them so much.

In this write-up, guys, I am going to point out some of those little and not so little things that a girl might do if she is hopelessly in love with you. It is my hope that when you recognize some of these things, you seat up and enjoy the ride, if you so wish, and most especially, if you can.

I hope you get the idea now, huh?

Anyway, that's just by the way.

OK, let’s begin.

A woman in love is all smiles.
A woman in love is all smiles. | Source

She will be submissive

A woman in love is so easy to control. You don’t even need to control her, so to speak. You only say the word and her soul shall be healed.

Of course, your wish is her command!

She will be willing to be submissive to you and to all your needs or demands.

She will even be willing to do more for you. As most guys who are able to ‘work’ a woman’s affection up to this level will ascertain, this type of woman will be willing to do anything for you.


She will tolerate. She will accept. She will compromise. In fact, she will give up all her powers to you.

You don’t have to blame her for doing this. She wants only one thing and that’s you—or rather, that’s your attention. She cannot afford to lose it. Of course, she is hopelessly in love.

She will put in the works and go the extra length

In most relationships, most people still find a way to look out for themselves. It is not selfishness. It’s just human nature and self first is our inborn survival instinct.

But not a woman who is hopelessly in love.

To her, one with love is majority. She cherishes the feeling. And she doesn't want it to stop.

Hence she will take care of you. She will cook the best meals for you. She will even try to mother you.

In fact, she will surely go out of her ways to do the strangest things you will never imagine a woman could do for a man. Don’t be surprised when you find her spending (all) her money on you and buying you gifts.

You might think she's crazy or foolish or something but that's not what she thinks...

She thinks you are worth it so naturally she will put in the works and go the extra length to allow the love between her and her man to flourish as long as doing that will make you smile, anything to please you.

Yes, your happiness is all that matters to her.

She will be possessive

This is one thing most guys hate about women. And it can really get worse if the girl is hopelessly in love.

She doesn't feel like sharing. She wants all of you—for herself. She can’t stand seeing you in another woman’s hand. It makes her to die inside.

She easily gets jealous on the slightest provocation when it seems another woman is trying to encroach into her territory.

She cannot think of you thinking about another woman. She is yours and you are hers and she cannot understand why you just can’t keep things that way.

A woman who is in love will so often worry about her man.
A woman who is in love will so often worry about her man. | Source

She will cry for you

Definitely. She will cry when you make her sad. Just like she will cry when you are feeling pain yourself. She wants to feel what you are feeling because she sees you as an extension to herself hence she’s always on the lookout for any change in your emotions.

She feels so much pain if you are not willing to disclose how you feel (about her). Just like she feels when you don’t seem to care how she feels.

She feels so lonely and abandoned and unwanted when you start giving off the notion that you don’t want to share your feelings with her.

To draw your attention, she will often times, break down in tears. It is one of those things being hopelessly in love does to a woman—to any woman.

She will defend you

She will defend you. In your presence, but most especially in your absence. She will not stand to see any (wo)man born of woman ridicule you without putting up a good fight in your defense.

People might call her names for doing this but she wouldn't mind because she couldn't care less. She has love and that is the greatest of all things.

Her friends might chastise her wrong choice in a man. Her family might ostracize her for not doing better in her choice of a man. The society might frown at her and call her desperate and despise her for choosing you but she is not overly concerned.

Of course, she knows that at the right time, people will always turn around and sing a different tune when the love between the two of you blossoms for all to see.

And she’s really hoping and patiently waiting for that day to come when she will tell her friends, her family, and the society that very thing she and she alone has seen in you.

If you understand this fact, you will then see the more reason why you should always think twice...and then thrice, before you dump a woman who is hopelessly in love with you.

She will not hide it

A man who is in love with a girl might still manage to hide it from her. This can be so confusing for most women as they keep on searching for the telltale signs or clues that will reveal the truthfulness or fakery of his affection for her.

What most of these women don’t know is that most guys learn very early in life to keep their emotions to themselves.

It is a different ball game when a woman is in love with a man. She wants everybody to know. She might try to deny it but her body language will always fail her.

She delights in just seeing him. His presence makes her to become so childish. His voice sets her blood on fire. His smile makes her appreciate the joys of living and staying alive. His touch makes her skin to start tingling with passionate sensation.

That is just for a woman who is in love.

Now let’s imagine, just think of what it is going to be like for a woman who is hopelessly in love…

She will respect you

One thing most men look out for in a woman is whether she is going to show him some respect.

If you are a woman, no matter how pretty or sexy you look, no matter how rich you are or appear to be, once a man finds out that you are quite haughty or that you are not the type that is going to respect him, your worth in his eyes takes a big hit as you become less and less attractive to him.

This could one of those reasons why some guys, at the end of the day, will simply settle for a woman who respects them because they instinctively know this woman will not and will never attempt to tell or show them ‘who the man is’.

But this is never going to be a problem with a woman who is hopelessly in love. Remember, we said she is going to be submissive and in some cases, being respectful is also part of being submissive and vice versa.

Simply put, she knows her boundaries and she's not going to overstep it.

She will hang onto your words

Of course. She will want to believe any and every word that comes from your mouth, no matter how profound or superfluous they might be. She's not a fool. She's just hopelessly in love with you.

If you tell her you love her, you better mean it, because she already believes it.

If you make a promise to her, you better be ready to fulfill it because she is hanging onto your words and you might never know when you are breaking her heart when you don’t do what you said you will do.

Granted, she will understand—or let’s say, she will try to understand if you are unable to fulfill your promises once in a while, but you should watch out before it becomes a well-known fact that you are just like a swindler, making promises but never interested in keeping them.

You will be better off catching her with a surprise rather than making promises because she is hanging on to your words—desperately.

She will be frank with you

Yes no games, no double dating, no sidekicks, in short, no third party. It’s just you and you alone.


That is one of the best things about a woman who is hopelessly in love with a man. The man will have nothing to fear about concerning her faithfulness as she will be ready to do more of those things that will decrease his insecurities rather than aggravate them.

She will tell you how she feels in truthfulness with all openness and no pretence. With her, there's nothing to hide.

She knows that she will be worse off if she does anything that will make the man to walk away as a result of her infidelity or telling lies. She’s afraid of losing him, of losing his attention and his warmth.

So she chooses the easiest path that guarantees that a man will stay—being very frank with him—at all times!


She will pursue you

A woman should not make the first move. She will lose her dignity and respect if she does and the man rejects her.

A woman should never pursue a man. She comes off as very cheap. It is a woman’s place to wait and be sought after because she is a woman and men are hunters.

So says the old rule.

But a woman who is hopelessly in love is also a breaker of rules. She will approach, she will pursue, she will hunt, and she will be ready to do even more, once the flames of love is on, just to get the man she fancies.

Once again, don’t blame her. And I believe you know why I said that.

Now this is where it starts getting confusing. Like I said earlier, believe it or not, most guys want a woman who will do all that for him. It satisfies his ego. It makes him feel special. It makes him feel like a man even though it equally brings out the feminine side of him.

But yet…

Most guys will still prefer to run away from such a situation most especially when they start recognizing these same patterns.

Having said all these, is it not surprising that most guys will not like to be caught in such a ‘trap’ all in the name of love?

Of course.

To me, it’s just goes to explain that human weakness that we want what we cannot have! Again, don’t forget that in most cases, the more you have something, the less you value it.

So what is the way out?

Have you ever fallen hopelessly in love with someone?

See results
An Ebook By Emmy Boy that takes a foray into the minds of men on what most men really wants in a relationship and tries to explain it to women. Now available on Amazon Kindle and Smashwords
An Ebook By Emmy Boy that takes a foray into the minds of men on what most men really wants in a relationship and tries to explain it to women. Now available on Amazon Kindle and Smashwords | Source

The advice is two folds.

For Women: Of course, the onus falls on women to watch how they fall hopelessly in love. I know you cannot help it. I know there’s nothing on earth like that feeling.

And yet…

You see me here warning you to take it easy.


It’s simply because like the old saying goes: Too Much of everything is bad—oh yes! What you think is your expression of love to him might actually end up working against you when he starts seeing you as a prison warden with himself as a prisoner.

I know you might be trying to show him that no one on earth loves or will love him the way you are doing but trust me, you are better off when you take it easy with him.

So please try. The trick is to fall in love with a man but at the same time allow him to do the same with you. Remember that since most men are logical, that means he will rather like to see the reasons for himself why he’s falling in love with you.

So give him those reasons: by your words, but mostly by your actions - the things you do and the things you didn't do!

Oh yes.

For Men: Give love a chance! You never know it but what you are looking for outside might already be there staring at you right there in your face!


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    • alexznumber1 profile image


      2 years ago

      Oh man I'm done I probably will never find a girl that will fall in love with me. I have fell in love with many girls, but girls that have fallen in love with me. Never. Or at least not that I've known. But like you said if a girl was interested I would've known she would've done back-flips like you said. I'm maybe what you call a hopeless romantic. I write a little bit. I'm glad I started writing again, and found this section of hubpages. Feels good to express yourself. I feel like you are a good writer.

    • dashingscorpio profile image


      4 years ago

      It really comes down to both people wanting the same things.

      There are no "gender shortcuts". One has to be willing to invest the time to get to know someone to find out if they are on the same page as you. There's no such thing as being "too clingy" if a person wants to be clung onto.

      If they don't it means they're not "the one" for (you). Be yourself!

      "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."

      - Oscar Wilde


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