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Where To Make Friends as an Adult

Updated on October 3, 2019

What Could Be Holding You Back

Childhood friendships came so easy. You lived in the same neighborhood or sat at lunch together it was effortless. As you get older your social circle seems to shrink and making new friends after a certain age becomes more daunting.

Making friends and keeping them as an adult seems to make us anxious. It doesn’t have to.

First, we have to stop judging ourselves. We often worry about what others think of us and this holds us back.

  • Will they think I’m desperate or pushy
  • Maybe I’m not good enough to be friends with them
  • Will I seem uneducated or less interesting than there other friends
  • Will I say too much or not enough
  • They have a better job than me will I seem less important

The way you see yourself will be the way others will see you. This in itself will hold you back from all things in life not just creating new friendships.

Test the water and start a small conversation to break the ice. It doesn't have to be about anything important. Introduce yourself and go from there. You should be able to figure out if this is someone you will speak to again or not during a few conversations. You never know until you try right!

If you decide you hit it off, then start small go for coffee or lunch. Remember, let it progress naturally.

“Friendship improves happiness, and abates misery, by doubling our joys, and dividing our grief.”

-Marcus Tullius Cicero

Possible Places To Meet Friends

There are so many places that you can meet new friends that share the same interests as you. You just have to be open and willing to put yourself out there.


I have put together a list of six places to possibly meet new like-minded adults.

*Note: Your friends don’t have to have all the same interest as you this way you can challenge each other to do new things *

1. Take a Class

Whether it’s an educational class, fitness class or a class for fun sign up.

It will put you in a room with others who are interested in the same thing you are or at least learning the same thing you are.

Introduce yourself is all, see if the conversation flows.

Source

2. Volunteer

Volunteering not only allows you to meet new people, but it also lets you do something to help others.

Find a local organization was you can volunteer your time.

Working together to solve one problem or reach a goal is initiative enough.


3. School/Children’s Activities

An excellent way to meet other adults that are parents. You can attend fun activities, join the PTO or just sit and mingle.

If your child's friend's parent has a similar interest, start your own friendship with them.


4. Recreational Sports Team

There are many adult recreational leagues out there. Basketball, Soccer, and Football.

Not an athlete, not a problem consider joining a trivia team or dart league.

Check local social media sites or gyms to see what is happening in your area.

Being part of a team is a sure-fire way to begin a friendship.


5. Church / Religion Program

If you prefer to meet someone who shares your faith. Church or religious events may be for you.

You can also usually find these on the bulletin board at church or the leaflet passed out prior to the service. If your new to the church attend a church luncheon or social.

6. Work

You already spend a good amount of time with your fellow coworkers. You socialize over lunch and find the conversations easy, so why not go out to dinner or shopping.

Just make sure this does not complicate your work environment. You can not let your friendship outside of work affect your relationship in the office.


The Importance of Friendship

Maintaining friendships may help your psychological well being as well as your physical well being.

When you have a good social circle you will feel as if you belong and your stress level will decrease. You will be less likely to lead a sedentary lifestyle and be more active.

In a healthy friendship, you will be able to rely on and trust each other. Friends will listen to your troubles and cheer you on when you need a little motivation. It can also boost your confidence and help perfect your social skills.

Have fun with it and make new friends!




Do You Find It Difficult To Meet New Friends

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    • momwantswhat profile imageAUTHOR

      Lynn H Johnson 

      2 years ago from New York

      Peeples I agree with you. Life gets exhausting and most of line I have met thru work as well . Thank you for taking the time to read it and commenting !

    • peeples profile image

      Peeples 

      2 years ago from South Carolina

      Great ideas. Sadly I think most of it is entirely too much work. Which is probably why all my friends usually worked with me at some point. So in my opinion #6 seems to be the best way to gain new friends as an adult.

    • momwantswhat profile imageAUTHOR

      Lynn H Johnson 

      2 years ago from New York

      Great points ! Yes we would have to make it a priority. We get busy with everyday life working, children and maintaining our current realtionships.

      I never thought of meetup.com thanks for commenting on that . I worry a lot about meeting people online so it did not cross my mind.

      Thanks for the insightful comment !

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      2 years ago from Chicago

      I believe the reason why a lot of us as adults don't make many friends is because we really don't make it a priority.

      As adults most people's top priorities is working sometimes two jobs, paying their bills, connecting with their significant other, and maybe raising children in addition to running errands and spending time with extended family.

      As a child all one had to do was go to school for the most part. There was plenty of "playtime" to hangout and socialize. Our friendships were the result of having to spend so much time together in classrooms or other activities at school or church.

      Some adults apply the same methods with developing friendships with their co-workers whom they spend the bulk of their waking hours with. As you noted if one has time they can enroll in classes of some type or join a local organization whereby they will have regular contact with a group of people. Meetup.com is also great for joining hobby/interest groups that meet once or twice a month.

      Bottom line is in order to make real friends you have to find time to get out of the house and once have made new friends you have to (make time) to spend with them in order to nurture those friendships. You also want to be careful {who} you befriend too.

      The only other option is to make friends through social media. However if never meet in person it's debatable if you're real friends. Most true friends have each other's phone numbers, home addresses, get together to celebrate events and so on.

    • momwantswhat profile imageAUTHOR

      Lynn H Johnson 

      2 years ago from New York

      Thank for the comment ! They certainly do help with overcoming stressful situations .

      I’m glad you have a circle of friends that bring you joy !

    • ChitrangadaSharan profile image

      Chitrangada Sharan 

      2 years ago from New Delhi, India

      Nice article and good suggestions!

      I agree with you that friends play an important role in our lives. With close friends, we are able to overcome stressful situations, because we can talk to them about it, sometimes seek solutions as well.

      It’s easier to make friends in the innocent childhood, because there is no competition, jealously or ego involved. As we mature, we start thinking differently and that creates a problem.

      Fortunately I have few friends, who can call close and I feel happy and relaxed, when they are around.

      Thanks for sharing this wonderful article.

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