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Why Do Men Cheat? 10 reasons why guys turn into cheaters

Updated on June 18, 2015

If you're in a relationship with a man who has cheated on you, then I feel your pain. Men are pigs.

However, it's always a good thing to try to understand the reasons why men cheat, so you might spot these characteristics in a future mate after you kick the cheater to the curb and tell him to rot in hell.

Remember something about evolution: men are programmed to spread their seed as far and wide as possible whereas women are programmed to nurture and stay in one place to raise a family. That's just how its been for millenia.

So the first key to understanding why men cheat is that they're programmed to do it. However, we also live in the modern age, where men should be smart enough to understand that cheating and committed relationships do not go together. Thus, if a man cheats on you, he probably has a reason, though it might be a really bad one.

Here are a few reasons a man might cheat:

Is he a cheater?
Is he a cheater? | Source

1. You Cheated First

If you're looking for reasons why your man cheated and you've been in a committed relationship for awhile but a few years ago you had a slight indiscretion but you guys got back together and suddenly you've figured out that he strayed as well recently and you're just completely beside yourself trying to figure out why after you guys reconciled, well, get a frickin' clue!

You cheated first!

Cheaters deserve each other. I suggest you find another guy and try to have a committed relationship with actual commitment. I am definitely not prone to blame the woman for what a man does, but if you're at fault, you're at fault. Oh sure, they're two entirely separate events. Tell yourself that if you need to. Unfortunately, once trust is broken, the floodgates to betrayal and revenge open up.

2. He's Hotter Than You

This is why should always go out with a guy who is uglier than you. Otherwise, hotter women than you are going to hit on him all the time and everyone knows that men cannot control themselves in this situation.

However, if you date a guy who's just a shade less attractive than you are, then you're a lot safer and he won't have these opportunities. (if your girlfriends are always telling you that you could "do better" or trying to set you up with guys they know even though they know you have a boyfriend, then you're on the right track)

3. You're Bad in Bed

If there's no sex inside the relationship, then there's going to be sex outside the relationship. And if the sex inside the relationship is bad, then he's going to go looking for good sex outside the relationship. In other words, make sure you're putting out or you're going to be putting him out. And if you're putting out, but not well, go get some lessons. The best thing you can do is ask him what he likes and what he needs from you in bed (and, of course, make sure he knows what you need). This is the best way to insure that he doesn't cheat.

4. It was Thursday

Guys don't really need a reason to cheat. They're guys. Thursday is frequently as good as reason as any to cheat on you.

5. You Smell Funny

You stopped using deodorent. You roll in manure. You don't shower. You're dead.

Men don't like it when their women start to smell funny, so if you smell funny, your many is likely to seek companionship elsewhere. This can also mean smelling funny downstairs, so make sure you've got that area of your body groomed and smelling good all the time. Remember, if ice cream smells like roadkill, a man is going to go buy his ice cream at another store.

6. It was Friday

See above.

7. He was Drunk

Everybody, man or woman, like to play this card. Personally, I'm not buying it. I've never been so drunk that I didn't realize sleeping with another person would probably piss off my committed partner nor have I ever been so drunk that I murdered somebody just for the fun of it. In other words, no matter how drunk I am, I know right from wrong. Does it lower your inhibitions? Sure it does. But I believe that anybody who says they were so drunk that they didn't know right from wrong is a liar in addition to being unfaithful.

What do you think is the most likely reason men cheat?

See results

8. His Mother Didn't Give Him Enough Affection as a Child

When a man grows up not receiving enough affection from his mother, he becomes prone to having sex outside a relationship because he's continually seeking female approval. So, assuming your man hasn't already cheated, make sure you meet his mother and try to get a handle on whether they have an affectionate relationship or not. Do they hug when they see each other? Do they kiss goodbye? If his mother is an icy, cold bitch, there's a pretty good chance that he's going to look outside your relationship for some nookie.

9. He was Bored

Men get bored with women easily. This is something you want to remember for your entire life, because if a man is capable of cheating and feels desired by another woman, he'll be tempted. If you work to limit that temptation, no matter how you do it, you'll reduce his desire to cheat because he'll weigh the risks and rewards and if he's at all intelligent and you've done your due diligence, he'll come down on your side every time.

10. He's Stupid

If you're doing everything right, then there's always the chance you have hooked up with a man who is stupid because that's what we call people who get everything they want and then turn their back on it in favor of instant gratification. Count yourself lucky that you figured this out sooner rather than later, but don't beat yourself up. Next time, just make sure you put your man through a series of questions so that you have no doubt about his intelligence so you can eliminate the stupidity excuse. Ask simple questions like: "Who is the President of the United States?" and "How much is two plus two." If he doesn't answer those questions correctly, you can be happy when he doesn't call back, though at that point, you probably gave him a mystery number anyway.

© 2013 Sychophantastic


Submit a Comment

  • dashingscorpio profile image


    5 years ago

    Men and women cheat for the same reasons. They want to hold onto all that is good in the "primary" relationship while addressing their other needs on the side. Cheaters don't believe they will get caught!

    Cheaters lack the courage to walk away from a (known) present relationship to fully pursue a future with an (unknown) person. Every betrayed person always asks "why" as a reflex question. The truth is they really aren't looking to gain some "understanding" and would never believe the cheater was "justified". Therefore asking (why) is nothing more than an rhetorical question! We don't care why! :-)

  • Levertis Steele profile image

    Levertis Steele 

    5 years ago from Southern Clime

    Sadly, women cheat almost as much as men.

  • fpherj48 profile image


    5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

    Sycho....LOL....Yes, they DO indeed, continue to ROAM.....and make a stop, here and there. Technology has made it much more difficult to be discreet or keep it secretive.....nearly impossible, in fact. I would state that "cheating" has been a reality since Day 1.....but, since "Adam" would have had NO ONE to cheat with.....I'm afraid it had to be much much later. all of you devout "Creationists," you do realize, do you not, that this Tale of Adam and Eve, can mean only ONE thing?......we are ALL the result of the "Original SIN/CRIME of " Incest". Not anything I like thinking about........YOU?

  • Levertis Steele profile image

    Levertis Steele 

    5 years ago from Southern Clime

    You wrote: "So the first key to understanding why men cheat is that they're programmed to do it."

    So, men are not separated from animals in this respect! Who programmed men to scatter their DNA? If this programming is natural, then fornication/adultery is too. Then, men are programmed to have children outside of marriage. They are programmed to produce babies with more than one woman. Solomon, the wise, had the right idea, I suppose.

    Men may have a desire to scatter their seeds, and women may have a desire to receive them. Every time a man scatters, a woman is involved unless he is gay. So, who is programmed? Men want women to think that they are programmed to sit at home and wait for them to return from cheating, but that is not the case in this century. They both cheat. As men exercise their “natural right” to cheat, women are becoming more and more promiscuous. Men are natural leaders, and they are leading by examples. “O, what a tangled web we weave!”

  • Sychophantastic profile imageAUTHOR


    5 years ago

    I'm totally feeling the love here! I would just say, fpherj48, that try as we might, it's hard to change millions of years of programming even though men aren't roaming the hillsides hunting for food. They're still roaming the hillsides.

  • fpherj48 profile image


    5 years ago from Beautiful Upstate New York

    Jeannie.....I do believe "poopy head," is an authentic, technical term. Sounds perfectly good to me.

    Seriously now, about some excellent and realistic explanations, from a very wise, EXPERIENCED, mellowed, older woman?

    Do you REALLY want to in the TRUTH? or are we just being silly here? Or, do you want to hear something you can live with and help you refrain from hurting and or killing someone?

    Sycho.....You were actually fairly accurate in stating that man's basic nature, is at work here. That being said, this is now 2013 and we surely need no more seed spread about, nor do men go out into the wilderness all day to hunt and fish, to feed his flock, that Mama has been tending to and breast feeding all day. I believe it's called: "Evolution."....which may have lead us all, away from temptation and into civility, The Puritanical age, morals & codes of ethics and all that rot. a matter of fact, Sycho.....we have come SO far, girlfriend, that every single reason you listed, with a few minor verbiage adjustments, are some of the exact same reasons WOMEN cheat!

    Very amusing hub. I like it!...........UP+++

  • Jeannieinabottle profile image

    Jeannie InABottle 

    5 years ago from Baltimore, MD

    Some men are just poopy heads. Yes, that is my technical term. They are just simply going to cheat no matter what. Of course, it does help it if I try not to roll around in manure, too. As a matter of fact, I try to achieve that goal everyday and so far so good.


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