- Gender and Relationships»
Why I decided to have a vow renewal?
Have fun planning your vow renewal
Reasons why people might decide to have a vow renewal
A vow renewal is a ceremony that signifies the rededication of a marriage. While a typical marriage tends to be enough for many, with the constant lure of divorce and challenges that couples face, performing a renewal is a beautiful way to refocus and to show each other how important you marriage vows continue to mean as your marriage continues to blossom.
My husband and I started off without the funds or support to have a wedding. We went to the courthouse and started our marriage with the promise that one day when we could afford it we would celebrate our marriage and dedication. For us our ten year anniversary was the best time for a vow renewal. We felt as if we achieved the one decade mark and that it was time to rededicate. I was also able to walk down the aisle in my beautiful dress.
Rather you share a similar story or you feel the need to just celebrate your wedding anniversary in style, a vow renewal is a beautiful way to step back and remember the beginning of your marriage, where you stand presently in your relationship, and where you want your marriage to be in the future.
What will my friends and family think?
While people will always have their opinions and will tend to share them rather or not you ask them to, a couple must pull away from negative opinions and anything that will lead them not to celebrate their love and commitment. Of course wise counsel should be heard however, marriage matters and in this day and time marriages can use all the celebrating and acknowledgment as possible. Or one can say it comes down to what you need to get a fresh start or more perspective about why you made this commitment in the first place? After all it can get a little hazy when the trials of marriage come into play.
For my husband and I, we did not get support to marry in the first place but when people saw that we not only stood the test of time but grew into a respectable couple then they did not hesitate to support our vow renewal. Not having pictures on the wall of mommy and daddy on their wedding day was not what we wanted our kids to remember. So also for our kids to see us celebrate our love, it served as an example and also as an assurance that we not only honor our commitment to each other but to them as well being that they are an extension of our love.
Love is contagious! A vow renewal can cause guest to evaluate their vows and to think about where they are in their relationships. People don't have to be trapped in loveless relationships anymore. They can quickly dissolve a marriage and never look back. To have friends and family gaze on your relationship as you endeavor to rededicate your lives to each other is priceless.
During our reception,we invited guest to discuss what makes a marriage great and what is important to keep it going strong. It was a powerful moment to see the married couples and older people who have been married much longer than us, share what keeps a marriage successful. We were truly honored to have them participate in such a powerful discussion.
How much should I spend?
When it comes to celebrations they can quickly become excessively planned and overly expensive. For me being that I did not have a wedding, I chose to treat my vow renewal as the wedding I never had. However, I did start with a budget that I could afford. My mindset was that I am already married so I can skip the bridal party and the unity candle. So I picked half the elements that I always wanted to participate in. My husband had his brother as a best man and my brother stood in the place of an officiant. Our kids participated to symbolize their importance and that was it as far as a wedding party was concerned. We got locally grown flowers that were on sale and we purchased decorations during the after Christmas sell. My mom and sisters helped me paint mason jars, and glue pearls on vintage candy dishes. We also picked a venue on the outskirts of town. Venues tend to be pricey in town. My dress was on sale and he rented his tuxedo.We asked a friend to take our pictures and we cut as many corners as possible to make it as inexpensive but yet elegant as possible.
In the future we will probably mark the next 5 years with a backyard party or a nice trip. A vow renewal can be simple or extravagant. Whatever makes a couple happy and feel comfortable enough to live after the celebration. For some the significance can be that it is the wedding you never had, for others it can be the reminder you need to keep your marriage in perspective. A vow renewal is just an excuse to celebrate! Whatever your reason, it is a beautiful way to remind yourself and the world how much you and your spouse truly love each other and your willingness to continue the legacy you have started.