T.V. isn't real!
Reality is blurred into what is on the telly
I consider myself to be a hopeless romantic. I often read romance novels. I cry at weddings although I don't usually do so unless on the occasions of stubbing my toe. I'm an affectionate person. I'm a compassionate person. I enjoy watching certain programs on television. I enjoy watching music videos and dancing shows.
To me, though, somewhere along the line I feel that some people are confusing what is on the television program versus what many people have at home. To have a relationship at home is not the same as someone on television or a video or reading a romance novel. I understand that my romance novel is just that. Entertainment. A relationship can be mutually beneficial to both people. I believe in for myself to have an intimate relationship with a male because I am a female. I am looking to date and ultimately be with a male long term. Some of my friends are straight, some are gay, and some are lesbian.
The thing that we all have in common is that we are all in relationships with other people. Some people ironicly call 'romantic relationships' that it would lead you to jump to the conclusion that relationships are what my daddy used to call "kissy face" all the time.
To me that isn't realistic because everyone gets into an arguement with someone at one time or another. My best friends I have gotten into arguements with over minor things like what time to leave for the day trip and major disagreements such as which guy I should accept an marriage proposal from.
Communication is extremely important to me. However me thinking that we are going to get along all the time will only happen on the rare instance that I had way too much alcohol that day. To have my mind clouded over and my actions and energy radiating how much..I love everyone. I have life experience being in many relationships.
To me that is NOT reality though. Being a "kissy face" with everyone is not being realistic with my current reality. My romance novels are not reality. They are meant to help me not to stress out if I've had a bad day. I do not expect anyone that I date to be like the men that I read about or even to have the same types of jobs as the men in my romance novels. I also have other hobbies as well. I do not expect the actors on the screen to come over and drink tea with me. Come on over so and so and let's have tea! You would think what is that chick smoking?!? I don't see that happening in this moment. To me that is not realistic.
Some people however have gone overboard on watching the television, watching the music videos, and noticing billboards. Those are entertainment related which is not real life. When some people watch television to the point that they are ignoring their entire family that is not good for the person, for the family, or the person's health. I don't think it is healthy to sit on the couch all day and all night long watching the telly because people are tempted to eat what is there. What is quick. On the television the person coming on the screen on the designated time slot on the program is there. You can even record the favorite T.V. show.
Over time what you view on the screen is what is familiar. The family is no longer familiar. The friends whom you once dropped hung out with to go to your place where you mingle have went on with their lives. What becomes like family becomes what you dedicate your time and energy to. If some people use this time to constantly watch television or watch videos or some similar activity then their life will suffer. It will occur over time when the friends no longer comes over after being emotionally pushed away for the hundredth time. The relationship will eventually end drifting off energy wise on the thin thread that what was once the thick rope made of the best materials type energy in the relationship.The lover will leave eventually as one person can only take so much of being ignored every day. The lover wants a relationship not a handsome mannequin.
I have dated a lot of men in my past. So many that I have lost count. I asked the men of various ages from 18 to 62 what their ideal woman was. I was shocked that the most popular answer was a woman on television. I'm like wait..what..that isn't realistic!..to myself. The woman that they hoped that I would be like and dress like was drum roll please...June Cleaver. WHAT? Who on earth is June Cleaver I thought to myself and why does any guy think that I am supposed to be like her?..I am not trying to pick on the actress that played her. To be honest I had to have someone who June Cleaver even was. That is a before my time show that I never saw before in my life. The show was called Leave It To Beaver. I was shocked at what I viewed. A lady in high heels with short hair that seemed to agree most of the time with whatever the guy said and whatever the kids said. She has the voice of an angel. Wow, I am so NOT june cleaver. The second most popular answer was Pamela Anderson. I admire her. I think that she is gutsy and she is beautiful, but, I'm not like her either. The third most popular answer was the person's mother. You want someone that is like your mother?..I thought to myself. I feel that some guys have confused what is on the television set on music videos and in their family with reality. In reality I think that you should get to know the person in front of you or online or even what is nowadays old-fashioned mail rather than want that. There are qualities that I admire in my family members but I would not consciously try to find someone that is like my daddy was although I loved him because that would just be too weird for me. I won't even date someone that has his distinct facial features on purpose because that is just strange to me. If someone looks like my dad I'm talking to the person" I'm sorry but you remind me too much of my dad." My dad is passed on. To expect someone to look and act and be like the person coming off a mechanical box is putting unrealistic expectations on me as a woman and a human being. I don't expect to hear clapping when I leave the room either.
I enjoy all the television shows, music videos, movies, and books that I have read but I have realized something important. In order to be in an intimate relationship I have to be a good friend first and then be someone's lover to do it in that order for a relationship to last. I need to put down my romance novel sometime even though I enjoy it. I cannot watch movies back to back without needing visine and ibuprofen later. I cannot make two seed bead rings in one night or I get a crick in my neck. For every action as the saying goes there is a consequence. The consequence of day and night to spend that energy on entertainment instead of the intimate relationship that I agreed to will cause that relationship or relationships to end. I like my entertainment, but that is not reality. I do like to be distracted momentarily by it,but, what is most important to me other than my relationship to myself or my family or friends is that relationship to my lover or steady or sweetheart or whatever title he is now called nowadays.
I like myself. I'm not June Cleaver or Pamela Anderson or someone's mother. I like myself and one day eventually I will find someone who likes me back. I will find a lover who isn't obsessed with entertainment but is interested in an actual relationship. I will try my best to be a fantastic friend and lover. My sweetheart and I will occasionally snuggle up watching that movie. We will listen to our favorite music. We will have our seperate crushes on movies stars..but I will find that guy with more realistic expectations one of these days. A man that is down to earth. I am keeping my fingers crossed and hoping one day to become a "kissy face" even if it is only part time of the time.