- Gender and Relationships
How to let go of someone you care about
During our lifetime, we meet many people. Some of them become friends or family for life. Others we know only for a short time. Some of these relationships can be intense and leave an imprint on our hearts. Sometimes it's a teacher, religious leader, a boy/girlfriend, a coworker. Often these relationships come to an end. Usually it is a natural ending like summer camp or changing jobs. These are good-byes that are expected. These are good-byes that linger in the back of our minds even as we start. I'd even venture to say that knowledge of the imminent parting helps to sweeten the relationship. If we know we are to be together for only a short time, we strive to make that time as good as it can be. But what of the relationships that end abruptly? The ones that either dwindle into nothingness or just stop...with out warning. How do we handle this? How does it make us feel? Sometimes, quite honestly, it is relief. There was something wrong, not quite right and it was time to move on. But other times, it hurts. It's confusing. You may or may not know what happened or why but you do know that you didn't get to have a say in it. Someone else decided for you. and that can be an interesting feeling, indeed. The following is a collection of sayings, poems and thoughts on letting go.
“Letting go has never been easy, but holding on can be as difficult. Yet strength is measured not by holding on, but by letting go.” - Len Santos
Today I cried....
For: what has left me, what I've lost and what I've thrown away
How time tricked us into thinking there was more. How it tricked us with it's optimistic words; later, tomorrow, next time.
Today I cried for all the tomorrows that time took away
when you left.
You are gone
"If someone you love hurts you cry a river, build a bridge, and get over it." -Unknown
the pain will diminish
it only hurts in the beginning
"You are responsible for your life. You can’t keep blaming somebody else for your dysfunction. Life is really about moving on." - Oprah Winfrey
When I hear a song that reminds me of you
When I see a movie that I know you'd like
When I hear a joke you would think is funny
When I meet a friend that you would admire
When I taste a food that you would savor
I think of you, my friend, my friend
I think of you. It's bittersweet.
Sweet was your smile of anticipation and joy
always at the ready
Bitter was the taste in my mouth when you left
No good-bye, no fare-thee-well, no it was nice
“To be able to move on, one has to learn to forgive not only the person (or people) who have done one wrong but also oneself” - Eugenia Tripputi
"When people walk away from you, let them go. Your destiny is never tied to anybody who leaves you, and it doesn't mean that they are bad people. It just means that their part in your story is over."-Unknown
This is probably the hardest part. Not running after someone, begging and pleading. We can take some time to reflect, try to understand what happened but we need to let the other person go. Unless something specific happened, it is probably a natural parting. After the initial shock, it's time to pick yourself up and start over. With all my friends, close and less close, I try to remember and appreciate what was good between us. When I reminisce, I smile, remembering the good, the funny and the fun. I focus on the depth of the friendship and look back on it as my good fortune to have had that person in my life, even if, for only a little while!
Do you know this quote?
“People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. When you figure out which it is, you know exactly what to do.
When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or spiritually. They may seem like a godsend, and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.
When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season.
LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway); and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.”