You're Such a Liar!
Lies and Deception
Satan, the fallen angel, persuaded Eve (the first human to sin) to rebel against God with lies that would make her separate from Him, to become apart from Truth by offending God. Satan himself is a Liar for there is no single truth in him. Satan is not just a liar, he is also the biggest deceiver.
Satan’s lie to Eve and Adam is to lure them to the tree with which God have warned man and woman not to eat the fruit of the tree that is in the middle of the garden.
“When you eat of (this tree) your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” -the serpent Satan
Satan deceived Eve and Adam by telling them what is not true (a false belief) and partly true (by evidence). The crafty serpent squirmed to tempt Eve and Adam standing before the tree, before the fruit, before himself- Satan disguised as a snake. “You will be like God,” he said and that is a lie because God is God alone. “You will know good and evil," he said this too and it is the truth for when Eve and Adam failed God and sinned, they were cast out from the Garden of Eden and instantly they knew what evil was.
You’re Such a Liar! Lying Destroys.
Your parents point their fingers at you and swing it side to side right before your eyes like that of a hand of a moving meter and firmly warns, “don’t you lie”. “When you lie, you lie to God.”
When attending a Catholic school, we hear masses in our own school’s Catholic parish, a walking distance from our school grounds. Our religion teacher teaches us ‘tips’ to confession. Really, I remember my religion teacher writing on the blackboard enumerating a long list of sins that children commonly commit. And then she faces her now ‘shy’ pupils (chins down, eyebrows arched, eyes up) and tells us to pick our sins from the blackboard, list them down a piece of paper and be secretive about it. “Don’t show it to the person next to you even if he/she is your best friend. Only God knows what you’ve written on paper.” “That’s easy,” I thought and I don’t have to be scared to talk to Father because I got my codigo (a piece of information) clutched securely in a fist. It is easy to read before him and I don’t have to tremble. We go off in a bee-line to the parish, singing hymns, sitting quietly and patiently for each of our turns to the confessional. “Bless me Father for I have sinned. These are my sins…”
But did the teachings about “lying and not to lie” changed us forever as kids? Did you ever say, “I can’t lie to my mother because I love her? I can’t lie to my sister or brother because they would always find out. I am scared to lie to my teacher, she’ll catch me lying and I’ll be punished in the corner.” No, the lessons about lying and not to lie still kept us lying to the people we love, to our superiors, to our friends, to our own children and to ourselves.
Lies & Deception
Who’s lying? We all do.
Politicians. Great political leaders lie a great deal to the world. The people believe in them and fall trapped as victims in their own manifestations to save you, us and the world…really? Really! But there are many admirable leaders too and they are great leaders once, then and now.
The Church and Christian Leaders. Religious instruments of God, have they ever told a lie? Oh yes, a great deal and they sin too. But who are we to judge? The problem is that the truth of God's ways is deviated by man. But those who followed the Truth, God had spared the saintly faithful leaders, His chosen ones. There are compassionate leaders still around, so you can trust them and pray for them to give them more strength and continue with their honest work for the Lord.
Lying Lawyers. Do lawyers lie? (To the lawyers, you know better. So, just *smile*). Here’s a conversation between a grandson and his grandfather:
Grandson: “I want to become a lawyer when I grow up.”
Grandpa: “Sure grandson, you mean you want to be a liar.”
Grandson: “But grandpa, I want to follow in your footsteps and become a clever lawyer like you too.”
Grandpa: “Sure grandson,you will become a liar like me.”
Parents and Children. Parents can lie to their children and the children lie to their parents. I lie to my children for the things they don’t need to know or to make that sound better, “reasoning out” than lying. If our children catches us lying to them all the time, what kind of models are we to them? They’d say, “well, you lied to me mom that’s why I’m lying to you.” If we don’t know when to put a halt about lying in our household, it will be a chaotic life with our kids.
Fake Friends. Your friends lie to you. Yes, they do and these are the kind of friends not worth your trust. They lie in front of your face and behind you. Watch your back and refrain from mingling too much around them. I’m good natured and very friendly, but why do I get lied by friends, despised and betrayed? We think positive now if this happens to you too. Say you are not the problem at all, it’s them. It’s the way they are. So the best thing to do is to stay away.
Co-workers. Does work lie to you? Perhaps and yes (from colleagues, superiors, management, even the person you think is your best friend at work). If you choose to use the right path and it is not happening for you, think again. The higher ups always feel they have the right and always think that they are right. We, the one below can’t complain too much about that. Just do your work. Your own peer would lie too to get rid of you for jealousy on your better performance than them.There are a ‘few’ so-called managers who lie to make them look good and you’ll likewise be in trouble because of them. Are they a perfect role model to you and me? The answer is “I don’t think so.” Imagine how peaceful could your little workplace be if everyone is respectful with each other, no lying, no passing on the blame, know when to accept faults/mistakes and know when to apologize. Superiors who handle their staff well are great leaders and they will in return gain great followers supporting each other.
Customers and Customer Service. Do customers lie? Do customer services lie? Yes they do, often to take advantage of what they want, keeping their mula, and saving “Eeyore” (if you know what I mean). But, “customers are always right” you’ve been oriented by those words, hearing about it over and over. It’s on the business air. You as a customer, do you lie? I don’t. Occasionally, I am the one getting lied on by customer service, poor customer service. With my experience in customer service, you need to portray the company in the best way you could and you cannot take any lies or insults from bad customer service because you don’t do that yourself.You are the flag-bearer. The company is you. Your outstanding deliverance, commitment and heartfelt engagement with your customers will reflect back at you. Customers love and would put their time to acknowledge you if you make them happy. So even if the mistake was from the customer and was deemed so, you don’t tell them that, neither making up lies to put the customer in a humiliating situation. Never do that, it will be the end of you. We are trained to love our customers and even accept the situation that the fault could seem to be coming from us (even if not). Apology, reassurance and making up to the situation are the best solutions to retain your customer’s patronage (and your job). Don’t make up stories and never lie to a customer. Remember my aunt’s advice below- “Make up a general reason that wouldn’t become a lie.”
Are you becoming a liar? Can you spot the signs on yourself?
Examine yourself in front of a mirror and be truthful as you can be. Lying to yourself won't help.
- When you are caught lying, do respond with another lie?
- Can you look the person asking you questions straight in the eye? Or do you avoid eye contact? Do you focus your gaze up or down or away from the person rolling your eyes?
- Do you find yourself talking and it didn't make sense to you, but you keep going. (A liar comes up with stories and reasons one after the other creating inconsistency.)
- Are you feeling defensive? Do you curl up your arms or legs, back up a little to keep distance, unconsciously reaching for objects you don't need?
- Are you replying in evasive answers or statements and become accusive with your looks and repetitive in your questions?
- Do you become silent if the other person knows and got you right that you just lied?
- Do you become suddenly reserved and rigid just like a dog caught for doing something bad?
- Do you sweat excessively on your palms or forehead when facing questions or interrogations?
- Do you find yourself switching the topic when addressed a situation about a lie?
- Can you hear your heartbeat pumping out off your chest that you can hardly sit or become uneasy?
The Lie Detector
Do you believe in the accuracy of lie detectors?
My aunt advised once: "If you feel you have to lie, say it in general form, then, it wouldn't be a lie."
Big lies. Little white lies.
Dad to 16 yr. old daughter: "I thought you said you'll follow me to church, but I didn't see you there. Did you go to church today?"
General response: "Dad, I wasn't able to. I 'will try' next time."
Lie: “I know, dad. I had a stomach ache. I didn’t wanna go.”
Secret reason: Gone out to a friend’s movie and shopping invitation.
General reason: “I wasn’t able to” is a safe answer. “I will try next time” does not give any promises. If she fails going to church by next time, she won't feel any guilt because she had said "will try".
Daughter to mom: (Coming home from school) “Mom, were you crying?” (Obvious to her that you are having goldfish eyes)
General response: “Yeah, something just made me sad. And don’t ask any more questions.” (With a smile)
Lie: “I just read a while ago a sad hub about losing a pet and it made me cry.” (Which could have been true from another day you’ve read that article), but…
Secret reason: Being upset with your partner.
Younger brother to older sister: “Did you use my cologne? I know you touched it again because I made an invisible scratch mark on the bottle and now it’s below the line.”
General response: “Thought a guy’s cologne smells good.”
Lie: “No. I didn’t. Colognes evaporate too like perfumes.” (Obviously, the smell of cologne is still floating in the room.)
Secret reason: Used the cologne because there was no perfume available.
Man to woman: (Driving home past 3 in the morning) “Hi hon, just dropped off Rambo and just got off the highway too to call you that I’m on my way home now.”
Woman to man: “Why can’t you call me a little earlier than just a few minutes to home? I left you messages and called you and you can’t even reply? Why wait till you get off the highway to call me?”
Lie: “I didn’t hear my phone."
Thirteen minutes and man arrived home.
Woman to man: “The moment you’ve checked your phone, you could have called me right away. You have to let me wait until past 3. You picked up my call once but I could only hear you and a woman’s voice and you never spoke to me then, hung up. Two more calls to you but no answer.”
2nd Lie: Silence. (Woman reads man’s face and there was only silence.) No reply from him any further.
General response (supposed to be): “It was too loud in the bar, but sorry, I didn’t even try to text you back. Also, there were friends I’ve given a ride to in the car and I just didn’t get the chance to ring you.”
Reason to doubt: Was it only Rambo in the car or a single female friend or 2 or 3 friends?
Husband to wife: “I’m buying a car after I pass my driving.”
Wife to hubby: “Really? Finally, we’ll be having our own car!”
Years passed, postponements, no driver’s licence, therefore, no car.
Wife to hubby: “Where’s that promise you made to buy a car.”
General response: “I’m buying a car, but we don’t really need it now. We live in downtown.”
Lie: “I promise I will buy a car after I pass my driving.”
Secret reason: Downtown parking is too expensive, can’t afford it. And there is still no driver’s licence. (Blah blah blah blah blah)
Girlfriend to boyfriend: (at home watching a movie together) “Did you just fart? That’s so disgusting!”
General response: (reaction) “Hahahahaha!”
Lie: “No. The dog did.”
Secret reason: Needed the bathroom but don’t want to miss some parts of the movie.
Mom to daughter: “You have to tidy up your room, sweetheart.”
General response: “Mom, I know. I’ll do it when I have the time.”
Lie: “Mom, I will, later.”
Secret reason: Getting to be lazy again.
Daughter to mom: (text message sent) “Mom, I took money from you. Needed $4 and I’ll give you the change and pay you back later.”
Mom to daughter: “What for? Did you lose your Metro Pass again or is it for lunch?”
General response and honest truth: “It’s for school mom. It’s “No Uniform Day” and for snack.”
Lie: Daughter didn’t lie. Mom was thankful for her honesty.
Secret reason: None
College daughter to Pa: “I’m sleeping over at Pretty’s place with Beauty.”
Pa to daughter: “Will you just be at your classmate Pretty’s house?”
General response: “We will just be having fun. Her parents are not there.”
Lie: “Yes, I will just be at Pretty’s house.”
Secret reason: The three girls had planned it and went on a blind date on a far drive to a beach late at night. (Did the daughter felt the guilt of lying to her pa when they drove past her place? Oh yes, and prayed hard nothing bad will happen during the long drive.)
Result from lying: The three girls and three boys ended up not being able to go out the next morning because of swelling rashes covering their bodies from the night’s skinny dipping.
Boy to housemaid: “Did you burn my jersey shirt?”
General response: “The iron was too hot, I didn’t realize.”
Lie: “No. I didn’t burn it. I left the iron standing far side and when I got back I saw the burnt spot.”
Secret reason: Have no knowledge that jersey fabric will burn.
Mommy to pet dog: “Hey, did you just mess up the garbage bin? Bad dog.”
General response: Giving you the “puppy look”, moves away and curls up in the corner”.
Lie: “Woof, woof, woof, woof, grrrrr!!!”
Secret reason: “Woof, I’m scavenging for last night’s chicken bone in the garbage while I’m not getting any of your ice cream.”
≈♥≈ ©coffeegginmyrice (Marites Mabugat-Simbajon), 09.21.2012