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Bring the SEXY back to your relationship!!

Updated on January 15, 2012
Love Note
Love Note

Does having kids means that there cannot be any "sexy" in your relationship? NO! Absolutely not! It just means that you have to work a little harder at bringing it back. We all want/like a bit of attention from our significant other so if we give a little chances are we will get a little back. I can honestly say that after having triplets I was lucky to remember to brush my teeth (gross I know but being busy was an understatement especially when they were young). I would wear whatever I could find at the time and I will be the first to admit that I was not really interested in anything but taking care of my children. This does not mean that I didn't have any love for my husband the problem was that I had very little time for myself. After a couple of years of wearing whatever I could find that would fit. It finally hit me that I needed to start taking care of myself. Doing just that made me feel better about myself and once I brought the "sexy" back for myself it was easy to bring the "sexy" back to the relationship.

If you are struggling with this right now or know someone who is there are several things that can be done to help to get the relationship back on course.


Love notes are so quick and easy to do. You can put a love note just about anywhere where your significant other can find them; on the steering wheel of their car, on the mirror in the bathroom, on the television remote, on the refrigerator door or any other place. When I started to make changes in my marriage I would leave little love notes in my husband's pockets (just remember that when you go through his pockets to do the laundry that YOU wrote the note). A simple love note can change anyone's day so turn that frown upside down and show him/her some love.


Flowers and/or gifts are a great way to get the attention of your significant other. They just show that you are thinking about your significant other and that you care. There is no need to go all out either (unless of course you are in the dog house for some reason) sometimes it's the little things that can mean the most to someone.


Sometimes we get really busy and don't have time to do the little things. Of course we always have our cell phones with us, so sending sexy text messages can be really quick and easy as long as you have text messaging on your plan. Sending something sweet like; "I miss you" or "I'm sorry" or something similar can make anyone's day. When your day is hectic or you are having a bad day sometimes receiving a sweet text message can change your outlook on the day and your relationship.


A date night even if it is only once a month can help to bring the romance back to the relationship. Some time away from the kids with just the two of you is a great way to reconnect even if it is only for an hour or two. I remember our first date night all we did was drive around the city it was wonderful to get away and be alone with just the two of us. So make a reservation at your favorite restaurant or take a long walk together and enjoy each other.


Dress up a bit, this does not mean you have to go all out. A simple change in attire, something that helps to make you feel sexier can go a long way. For me I am and will always be a sweats and t-shirt girl, so when I change to a nice shirt and jeans it is very noticeable. A very simple change in how you present yourself can change the way you feel and can also change the way your significant other looks at you.


Probably the most important are hugs and kisses, sometimes we can forget in our hectic schedule how important these are. I am not necessarily talking about a long drawn out hug or kiss (those can be great as well) just a hug that is a little tighter or a kiss that is a little longer something that is more than a simple hug or kiss hello or goodbye and sends a special message.

Sometimes it takes these very minor changes or adjustments to change the shape of your relationship. We all need reminders of how much we are loved and needed and taking some extra steps can help to bring the sexy back to any relationship.


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