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A Date with Disaster?

Updated on April 21, 2016
Stella Kaye profile image

Stella has written a selection of articles on dating and relationship issues that include sound advice for online daters,

Dating dilemmas


How to avoid dating disasters

Whether you are going on your first ever date or have become available again after a period of time has elapsed since a previous relationship ended, it can be a daunting prospect for both sexes to play the dating game.

Dating through a close friend’s recommendation is usually a great idea as this gives you some peace of mind. Double dating is also a good way to get to know someone new.

There is plenty of helpful advice available in the form of the Internet. Whatever type of person you are looking for, an online search will put you in touch with those who are compatible and thus be most likely for you to form a meaningful relationship with - be it for a casual fling or a long term commitment. Every Internet dating site has their own individual set of rules and guidelines which will help you immensely in your search for a new partner.

No one need be lonely nowadays; it is only a short step away to find that special someone who can make all the difference to your world. Are you desperately lonely when Valentine’s Day is fast approaching? Do you snuggle up on the sofa with a box of chocolates or a bottle of wine to console yourself?

There is no need. You can find someone suitable and you can meet them safely if you adhere to some sensible rules.

Always tell a close friend or confidant where you are going and when you will be back.

Never meet a first date in an isolated area; ideally your first meeting should be in a public place during the daytime where there are lots of people around such as a coffee bar or shopping mall. There will be a vast selection of venues to choose from and something to suit your individual taste and that of your prospective date.

Don’t get carried away with alcohol consumption so you lose your inhibitions and do silly things associated with over indulgence. Be well aware that unscrupulous people do occasionally try to spike drinks.

Dating online can be a godsend for people who lead busy lives and are unable to forge new relationships any other way due to location problems or lifestyle restrictions but be wary that people are not often who they say they are. If you want to be extra wary arrange for a friend to accompany you on the first date and suggest that your date brings someone along too. Why not meet up at the house of a friend on neutral territory so that neither one of you feels awkward?

Don’t wear too many valuables on a first date and choose appropriate dress that is impressive but not over the top.

Do a bit of research and check out your prospective date on facebook to see if they really are who they say they are. Most folk nowadays have some sort of online footprint however obscure and even a phone number can be Googled and valuable information gleaned.

Here are two worldwide dating sites that will help you in your search; both are free. Many sites specifically match you up with the most compatible people on their books and this will go a long way towards helping you get the company you prefer and feel safe in the knowledge that you have made the right choice.


Plenty of fish

Maintaining a common sense approach will ensure you are as informed as you can be about your new date. Check out that the information they have given you about themselves adds up.

You will have to be wary for the first few dates until you are comfortable in their presence and then it is up to you to decide when you feel they are completely trustworthy. Of course it is not always easy to gauge when this point will arrive and every new relationship requires a slightly different approach but being on your guard until you know your new date better will do no harm.

Get wise to scammers who will be out to fool everyone and never ever part with any financial or personal details. There are also a particular breed of scammers from abroad who will think nothing of marrying you for your passport and your money only to disappear from your life, Single older women fall for this one time after time, but seriously, ladies, if he is thirty to forty years younger than you, do you really think he wants you for you? Be realistic about your prospects so you stand a better chance of finding someone to suit.

© 2015 Stella Kaye


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    • Stella Kaye profile image

      Stella Kaye 2 years ago from UK

      Thanks for your comment; I'm pleased you found my article useful and agree with the above.

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 2 years ago

      Voted up and useful!

      Too often people also forget that dating is supposed to be FUN!

      If two people don't enjoy each other's company/have a good time most likely there will not be a second date.

      Relax and be yourself!

      Stressing out or putting pressure on yourself to make a date "the one" can drive you crazy. Remember no one is asking you to decide on whether to cut the red wire or the blue wire! It's just a date!

      If there is no chemistry then focus your attention on the activity of the date. Enjoy the play, concert, movie, game, meal, or whatever it is.